Anyone whose partner doesn’t want you to have a full climax ?

We're at about 6 weeks currently which I think is the longest I've been locked. We got a new beautiful metal cage at the beginning of this which she loves. I don't know but I think it's going to be for a long time. My mistress has not really been saying strict things but I think she's found her groove this time, really enjoying the benefits. We just celebrated a year of me being piv free, my birthday came and went last week caged but with an amazing torture and strapon night. I just think she realises that me cumming is of no benefit to her and is over the sympathy releases. We'll see, I'm never given any timescale just some of the things she said makes me think it's going to be a long time.

 

My GF is adamant that I had my last orgasm, which was almost 4 months ago and the previous one was 3 months before that.

I agree with her reasoning (the drop, being horny is far better than 10 seconds of bliss), but I would still like an orgasm.

She also participates in orgasm denial, saying she prefers the teasing and never ending feeling of being horny.

Read the book Dopamine Nation and you'll probably be convinced that orgasms are bad too, or read Mantak Chia's books and you'll probably realise that ejaculation, at least, is unwise especially as you grow older.

But, reasoning aside; It's wonderful to be so damn horny and so into one another.

JFYI: We aren't into any other kinks so no pegging, ruins, cross dressing, blah blah.

 

Nineteen days since my last orgasm, Mistress hasn't said if I'll get another one or not. To be honest, the level of arousal and euphoria I'm feeling from being denied makes me happy not to have another.

 

A full climax I use to know what they were. Mistress property is permanently caged and has been for over 4 yrs. and Mistress property last orgasm was 2 yrs ago. It was a ruined one and I'm not sure if slave and Mistress property is ever going to be allowed another climax. Mistress smiles and says Mistress property and slave will get plenty of edging, teasing, tormenting and plenty of frustration and denial. And that should be plenty for a poor CHASTITY SLAVE.

 

My wife currently only allows 2 or 3 full orgasms a year and a handful of ruined ones. She’s hinted that the full ones may become even less soon, if not disappear altogether. I don’t think it’s about her being mean. Sure there’s some sadism in there but I think mostly it’s that there are too many benefits to her, me and our relationship to justify the 10 seconds of pleasure I get.

 

So many correlate “no” to being mean… most of us initiated and asked for this lifestyle so either embrace/enjoy or have an open honest conversation with your partner etc.

I personally have given TOTAL control of my cock and my orgasms (full, ruined, or otherwise) to her. We’ve been inching closer and closer to “permanent” denial for a while and have played with chastity off and on over the last 10 years or so, but the last two have been much more amped up as she wanted me pierced, and now in a PA cage that allows for indefinite wear for the most part.

To date this year I’ve had 5 full orgasms, 4 of which were in the month of January, and I’m at nearly 60 days currently so number 5 was about 2 months ago. I do have the occasional “leaking cum” as she likes to put it, and that’s somewhere between the edge and a ruined - not near as much fluid comes out, and she does like to peg me or use other toys/fingers to make me leak out as well via prostate massage.

Do I want to never have a full orgasm again, hell no, but do I see some benefit in not being allowed to have one, hell yes. The pure pleasure wave you ride all the time from arousal, and when I’m allowed to have PIV without cumming, it’s simply amazing and blissful… makes you take your time and enjoy each thrust and ever sensation. I used to read about tantric sex and that euphoria that supposedly comes from practicing it - not that we necessarily do practice it, but I’d say we’re skirting the lines and enjoying the benefits that come from keeping me orgasm free.

Lately she’s mentioned making it permanent… but she wants to phase it into mile stones - have done 60, then 90 days, and currently she’s pushing to keep me denied at least twice that and/or through the end of the calendar year - I agreed to do 6 months then evaluate things, as did she, but I’m sure she’ll push to keep me denied longer and longer.

It’s a journey and different for all of us. Certainly as I get older the quality of the sex is better than quantity, although we do have sex more when I’m locked up than we did when I wasn’t.

 

When my Wife (KH) decided to start MC, she hated when I had the "drop". So, my orgasms became further and further apart. I'm now 13 month without a orgasm.
I don't think she is being mean, it's just our lifestyle now. I have given my Wife full control of my sex life and she decide when or if I will have another orgasm. Right now, my only sexual release is from leaking, no milking or ruined orgasms.

 

When I first brought up chastity and my Wife agreed to be Keyholder we had written out a contract that included a weekly orgasm for me.
That very quickly changed into an orgasm about once every 3-4 weeks, after 6 months of that it turned into one every 8-10 weeks.
Now I believe the current lockup will be at least 90 days and we’ll probably do a few cycles like that before cutting back to 1-2 per year.
I am totally on board with this schedule and really happy with how we’ve grown into this.
I should say that when I do get to cum, I usually get to cum 2-4 times over a period of a few days before She will lock it back up and start the new cycle.
She does like to get cum inside of Her during PIV so that is basically the only reason I am let out now.
Generally She is very happy and satisfied without PIV though, so it isn’t often.
She is very clear though that if I do ejaculate it should be inside of Her or there is no point.
My hope is that we can eventually outsource the job to a more skilled PIV’er, that way when She does have a craving, She can still get the load inside of Her, but it doesn’t have to effect my lockup.
I’m not sure if that is in the cards, but I think She is considering it.

 

My wife is bi and prefers sex with women a lot more than with men. Only men that arouse her are the young model looking studs you see on TV. She does not find penises aesthetically pleasing or arousing. She had a live in girlfriend for 30 years of our 50 year marriage. Tried another guy once to see if the problem was me or men and learned the problem was that men just do not arouse her much unless they are feminine looking which I am not.

To make matters worse, she used to fuck me a lot to get pregnant but then we found out I am sterile and can never even use my sperm for artificial insemination because they are all deformed. After that there was no need for sex with me and she would occasionally bring girls home for a threesome so I could have someone to fuck. However, most ended up giving me oral since I also had ED and would fall out of their pussies. They did like my small cock for oral because as a few said, they got to experience deep throating a full cock in their mouth. They also let me do anal since I was small enough so it did not hurt them and I often was the first guy they let do anal because of that.

Then I gained 100 lbs. and my wife plain stated that I was sexually unattractive and did not want sex with me anymore. That is when we decided that chastity was the answer. I was cut off from all types of sexual penetration over 20 years ago. My wife's live in girlfriend tried to give me a pity fuck once but my penis fell out of her when it got soft and she asked me if I came because she could not feel my cock or my ejaculation. My cock had fallen out of her and I came on my thigh so she never tried again. She also agreed with my wife that my oral skills were not nearly as good as a woman's and with me it took over a half an hour to get them to orgasm while with each other or other men or women, they came in minutes, multiple times too.

My wife could care less if I never had an orgasm again. Been caged 12 years and longest I went without an orgasm was 6 months and even then it was a ruined orgasm that went too far. I lost 100 lbs and my wife finds me attractive again. I used to be pretty and attracted both gay men, gay women and hetero women. I have had women ask me for sex on airplanes twice, at hotel bars and pretty much wherever I went. I have had over 30 girlfriends and about 2,000 FFM threesomes in my life. At first the threesomes ended in my orgasm by penetration, oral or manually. Then after I could no longer have sex with the ladies my job in the threesome was to assist them in getting each other off and then torturing me sexually while I jerked off all the while hurting me more and more until I came.

Even now that my wife is interested in me again since she has no girlfriend and I lost a lot of weight, she still keeps me locked and controls my orgasms. She uses her vibrator and I jerk off so our sex is mutual masturbation. Still not allowed to fuck her or do oral. She is not mean, just not that into guys, especially old guys. Funny that my ex fiancé also preferred women and left her husband for a woman a long time ago. Even my girlfriend in between my two fiancés had a girlfriend she spent the weekends with. Bi women find me attractive as well as gay guys since I lost my virginity to a gay friend and then had sex with another gay friend in my teens.

Despite this we had a lot of sexual fun. We had sex in public, in limos, with other couples and with other women in threesomes. We did evey fetish we could find online. We role played with my wife dressed like a prostitute in Las Vegas where she almost got kicked out of a Casino. We would let room service in while naked or while my wife was going down on her girlfriend. We mostly got into BDSM though with me as the submissive masochist.

Yet for the last 23 years masturbation was my only sex and only when unlocked. Mean no, not into guys, yes. She does make sure I get some BDSM fun and the occasional orgasm because she loves me as the only man she can love.

 

It is not Her hope, I don’t think She cares. I think eventually She will do it for me and find that She likes it and maybe continue to do it more for Her.
Or maybe She won’t like it and won’t do it again. I don’t know, it could all go either way. It is my fantasy that I’d like to try to make real. But she’ll decide.
Last night She happened to be staying out and we did a role play scenario where She was going to meet a guy late night for sex.
I mean, who really knows, She could’ve actually been doing that. But I’m pretty sure it was just a game for my benefit.
Maybe that sort of play is enough. But I’ve got that cuck bug pretty bad and She is only scratching the surface of Her sexuality, so if I had to guess, She’s going to try it someday. It may be far down the line, but I think She is curious.

 

edit, yeah we have had the conversation, She has determined that She is not ready, I don’t think has ruled it out permanently though

 

I'm probably one of those partners, but I don't think of it as being mean.

Last year hubby asked me to keep him locked up full time (before that we had played with chastity now and then, but always returned to lighter teasing and denial afterwards). At first I tried letting him have an orgasm after a week. It was terrible. I tried two weeks. Just as bad.

I was very irritated at that point - I was indulging his kink, and he was making it difficult (it wasn't until later that I learned about drop). I gave him an ultimatum: chastity or orgasms, he couldn't have both. He chose chastity.

After I cooled down (and learned more about drop), I backed off of that "zero orgasms" position. In fact, I really want him to have as many as possible as long as the drop remains negligible. Right now that looks like about four orgasms per year. He's not thrilled with such a small number, but he still agrees that this is the best course.

It's like he knows this is best, but he can't quite make himself do it, so he needs me to be firm. The big head wants me to be strict, and the little head is very frustrated. Yes, it can appear mean. Sometimes it feels like I'm being a terrible wife. But in the big picture I'm giving him what he truly wants. If that ever stops being the case then we'll stop.

 

I went around 9-10 months without a full orgasm. It was what I asked for, but I didn’t think she would ever deny me for so long.

That changed recently when things between us took a difficult turn, we went back to the cage briefly, but with the understand that it wasn’t escape proof in the slightest it really had less of the impact it had before.

Living cage free, I think we have both learned together that actually I am much better without my orgasms… so much so that she actually changed her opinion on cock piercings. Just waiting on a new cage now, I will be intrigued how she interacts with it when she regains the control again.

I don’t think there is any man on here that doesn’t facilitate their own denial. It takes will power and agreement on both sides, making yourself climax is possible even within a cage.

 

I dont really get a "drop" in fact I usually feel euphoric and I can only describe it as my brain "sings" after we have had a good mutual orgasm. But its important that I lock back up...if let loose then I can feel the drop.

I think I am one of the few "veterans" where I havn't progressed to longer and longer denials, the longest being 5 weeks, at that time I again was in two minds, grateful on one hand but wanting to demonstrate her pleasure was more important than mine.

I am both happy and disappointed when my partner tells me I am to cum with her, and she knows I wont complain if she ask me not too, indeed in some respects I want to demonstrate to her by not cumming how much I love her.

But I think it is as simple as she likes me to climax with her. Chastity doesn't really do anything for her other than making sure I dont/cant masturbate or do anything else without her knowledge, and as she says it makes me more productive, and I am sure also more attentive...which is probably true.

After all we are here to please and if it pleases her for me to cum with her.....not arguing.

 

My wife has stopped me having an orgasm many times, whenever she feels mean or when i've been an ass

 

Yesterday, she teased me when we woke up until I couldn't control myself. I was desperate for release / an orgasm. But it had only been 3 days since my last orgasm. We both agreed that it should be at least a month before I'm allowed another one. But in my mind I thought that she could feel how desperate i was and would let me out. Of course that was not the case. She's become very good at this and doesn't see it as being cruel anymore. She thinks that teasing and denying me is her ultimate act of love for me. She knows she's keeping my hormones amped up so that I'm the man we both want me to be. Fortunately, she usually allows me to pleasure her before we're done. The times that she continues to tease me while I'm pleasuring her are the most amazing and take the longest to come down from.

 

I don't think I have a "drop", is that a real thing? I mean obviously immediately after cumming I am not interested in sex for a while, don't feel like putting the cage on again etc but it's not like I am in a bad mood then or the next day.

 

If I was to describe “the drop” I wouldn’t necessarily say it’s a bad mood. It’s more the absence of a positive mood, but not even like you are grumpy. It’s just a lack of focus on your partner as you’ve fulfilled the desire to climax.

 

For me it's not about being in a bad mood, but it is about my level of arousal dropping - that constant production of dopamine and staying on the pre-orgasmic plateau is what makes chastity and orgasm denial so enjoyable for me. Once the wave of Oxytocin washes through with orgasm, dopamine levels drop off and reduce arousal and to a certain extent my feelings of submission. A manifestation of that would be a reluctance to put the cage back on and a corresponding drop in focus on my partner.

 

I’d say my drop is disinterest. I just want to exist but not do or say much of anything for a while. Now that I experience it much less frequently the drop is more intense as well, so limiting orgasms makes it worse which consequently makes her want to limit them more, and so on.

 

We've found that magic formula for use where there is no drop if I put the cage back on afterwards. I don't feel disinterested in sex... in fact, I'm still pretty horny. She likes to give me an O before she allows me to play with her. I never feel too tired or disinterested to play after mine. This last time, we had a bit of a marathon session and I spent 30-45 minutes giving her a massage and foreplay after she gave me somewhat of a full body O. Part of me wants another O right away because I know the next one is a long way off.

Frequent teasing and month long lockups are a big part of our formula. No ruins. No erections. No releases to touch or edge me.

 

Mine keeps me locked. I only get ruined orgasms. Haven’t had a full O in over 5 months.

 

I'm in this boat. Xena just doesn't want me to orgasm at all.