Telling female friend

Discussion in 'Chastity and orgasm denial' started by cman991, Dec 10, 2023.

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  1. cman991
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    cman991 New member

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    #1 cman991, Dec 10, 2023
    I'm unsure if I should tell my friend about my chastity fetish. We are very close and talk openly about sex a lot. We also flirt a lot. She also knows I have done some pretty kinky stuff with my ex's. We are both switches but she said recently that she thinks she leans more towards dominant. After telling me that I was tempted to tell her about my chastity fetish and maybe see if she would want to be my keyholder. I think she would be up for it but am more worried about the dynamics of our friendship changing too much. Just wondering if anyone else has had similar experience's or just peoples opinion on it?
     
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  2. LesterBallard
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    LesterBallard Long term member

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    #2 LesterBallard, Dec 10, 2023
    Tread carefully
     
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  3. PornAddict103
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    PornAddict103 Happily addicted to Tease & Denial

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    #3 PornAddict103, Dec 10, 2023
    Next time she brings up a topic of domination, just ask her in a way like: "Hmm... Just out of curiosity. If think you may be the dominant type, then what do you think of Chastity?" Something like that. It sounds more like an honest question and not like you're insinuating something.
     
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  4. newplay
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    #4 newplay, Dec 10, 2023
    maybe next time ask her what she thinks of chastity?
    if she has ever thought of it
     
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  5. The Queens consort
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    #5 The Queens consort, Dec 10, 2023
    I told a female friend, just as a FYI. She was OK with it, and told us to have a good time with it. She lives across the country, so it’s not like she feels any pressure to be involved. For me it was an opportunity to share a personal secret with someone I trusted.
     
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  6. Kiesela
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    #6 Kiesela, Dec 10, 2023

    just tell her.
    There's nothing wrong or bad about it.
    Thats all in your mind.
    Not hers.
     
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  7. cman991
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    cman991 New member

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    #7 cman991, Dec 10, 2023
    Chastity has come up in conversation before but that was quite a while ago and we wasn't as close as we are now. I kind of just make a joke and brushed off the subject. Maybe I will mention about them again if the conversation heads in that direction.
     
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  8. PornAddict103
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    #8 PornAddict103, Dec 10, 2023
    That's what I was hinting at... Wait for her to bring up the topic and then ask her. Just be sure to make it sound like a curiosity question and some impulsive suggestion.
     
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  9. cman991
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    #9 cman991, Dec 10, 2023
    Well I have told two close male friends who are both quite kinky people and one of them has a cage too so was nice to talk to about. Other than them only two of my ex's knew.
    If I was to tell her it would be because I want her to get involved but having only every been in chastity to girls I was dating I'm not sure If its a good idea.
     
  10. cman991
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    #10 cman991, Dec 10, 2023
    Yeah there is nothing wrong but still seems scary to bring up the subject. Although I think she will be cool with it, I could be wrong. also if she did become my keyholder I don't know if I would regret it. My exs never kept me locked too long a few days at a time at most and wanted PIV often but as a friend the dynamic is very different
     
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  11. cman991
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    #11 cman991, Dec 10, 2023
    yeah your probably right
     
  12. M@rcellus
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    #12 M@rcellus, Dec 10, 2023
    I would ease into it. Maybe ask if you could cum over her feet from time to time. You may find she has no interest in your releases while she enjoys growing as a domme.
     
  13. maiden sissypanies
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    #13 maiden sissypanies, Dec 10, 2023
    That right there is reverse psychology, and I hope it works lol
     
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  14. madams-sissysub
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    #14 madams-sissysub, Dec 10, 2023
    I don’t think there is anyone better suited to tell about it!
     
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  15. maiden sissypanies
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    #15 maiden sissypanies, Dec 11, 2023
    Can women keep a secret, I know I can`t.
     
  16. PornAddict103
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    #16 PornAddict103, Dec 11, 2023
    I agree with this. :+1:
     
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  17. Muppet
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    #17 Muppet, Dec 11, 2023
    If you have already talked about kink then there’s no reason you can’t say that you would like to be kept in chastity but don’t have a keyholder. Then it’s likely she’ll offer, I imagine. But you probably shouldn’t ask outright.
     
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  18. Mr_anonymous
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    #18 Mr_anonymous, Dec 11, 2023
    I'd tread carefully but if there ever was an opportunity this seems like it. Be awful ruin a friendship over it though.
     
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  19. Muppet
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    #19 Muppet, Dec 11, 2023
    My keyholder is a female friend and it works really well, but it evolved slowly between us. But given you two have already talked about such topics comfortably I stand by my earlier suggestion. Put it out there and see if she volunteers. If not, leave things as they are.
     
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    #20 Littlejt1, Dec 11, 2023
    Sounds like you have a very open and honest communication between you and your friend, which is the key to any solid relationship of any kind, period.

    Since it sounds like you infrequently talk about sex and kinks, I wouldn’t think the subject would be out of bounds. I wouldn’t overtly blurt out that you want her to be your keyholder, but you can easily say “I’ve always been curious about chastity…” and see how she responds. Another thing to get the conversation going is simply talking about “control” - since she leans domme, as her what her thoughts are on controlling another man’s orgasm frequency etc, and then see where things lead. Only you can really judge where your relationship is with her, but from what you’ve told the group, it sounds like y’all are pretty open.

    Good luck!!
     
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  21. filltee
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    #21 filltee, Dec 12, 2023
    My friend knew I was into wearing a chastity device and told me she would not be offended if I asked her to be my keyholder until I got into a relationship in which male chastity was a thing.
    I asked her
    She agreed and wanted some conditions.. what she said went, I would not ask to be released or when my next release was or ask to discuss either. She would keep the keys and would I would never attempt to get out without permission nor would I ask to get out unless it was an emergency. Or the game was over and my keys thrown away.
    So I emailed her back agreeing to all her rules and her rules being the sole conditions of her keeping me locked and denied but only for as long as she wants to.
    And she has been true to her word in she became my keyholder and a little later my Lady
    We had inadvertently on my part and probably (she's never admitted or denied it) deliberately on her part at no time had we discussed a any schedule for me have time out or an orgasm. And since then she has kept me locked and denied and that was 61/2 years ago.

    So be careful what you wish for
    and the wording of what you agree to
     
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    #22 sonhee, Dec 12, 2023
    So how often did she release you?
     
  23. Muppet
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    Muppet Long term member

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    #23 Muppet, Dec 12, 2023
    He said. Never.
     
  24. sonhee
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    #24 sonhee, Dec 12, 2023
    In that case I refuse to believe the 6 1/2 years...
     
  25. Muppet
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    #25 Muppet, Dec 12, 2023
    Why?
     
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