Is security that important

It is Extremely important to my wife.

 

Your post title asks about security but then in your actual post you ask about preventing orgasm. To my wife they’re both important, I found out just how important when I rather brazenly pulled out of my previous cage in front of my wife. It made her feel “some sort of way” seeing that I could very easily pull out and put it back in without unlocking. This demonstration led to her piercing me and an order for a PA secured device. As far as sneaking in an orgasm, while completely possible she would absolutely know and I’d be in a world of hurt from betraying her trust. She has told me that if I were ever to break out of my current cage don’t bother coming home as we would be done as a couple.

To be honest, before we got any cage she had requested me to no longer masturbate and I was able to honor that for her. What the cage adds is a complete level of control over me being able to touch my own dick (it’s not even mine anymore, it’s her’s now), to fully become erect and to experience any pleasure through my dick outside of what she allows me to have. That is very important for her. My love, respect and submission to her is so strong that I will not betray that. There are multitudes of men that do not require even as much as a cage to maintain that level of commitment for their wife. To be honest, your post makes it out that you are the weak one knowingly betraying your wife as you admit that you do.

 

I'm of the view that if you are denied long enough then a strong breeze can make you cum if you want.

I'm locked in a piercing attached titanium cage, which I could take off with the use of tools easily enough, if I wished.

If I came, or escaped the cage, then the glorious things my KH and I do would end, and I don't want that to happen and neither does she.

I find commitment and self control are key. I promised her I wouldn't try to cum, or look for the keys, or try to escape from the expensive cage she bought.

 

Really need to work out an open line of communication with your wife. Tell her each and every time that you are feeling at “the breaking point” not that she should grant you a release rather as an accountability partner. It might not do anything to relieve the physical pressure but probably will do wonders on an emotional release to have an incredibly open conversation with her, developing trust in both of you in regards to keeping true to your pledge of no orgasm.

 

Security from removal really varies from cage to cage. I often think about how I might be able to cut mine off and free myself. I honestly don’t think that I could remove mine without an extra set of hands. The reason being is that the locking part of mine is a floating barbel 6mm thick. Since it’s not firmly attached, I would need to do 3 things to cut it off successfully without either burning, or risk cutting myself by slipping with a dremel tool. There’s not enough room for bolt cutters to cut the barbel, so I’d have to use a dremel tool. First, I would need to hold it firmly with vise grips so it wouldn’t slip during cutting. Secondly, I would have to death grip the dremel to make a steady cut to insure that I wouldn’t slip whatsoever. Lastly, I would have to cool the cut with lots of water so the barbell wouldn’t overheat causing burns. Not enough hands for that operation. Naturally, I would be too embarrassed to ever ask anyone to help me escape this thing so I do believe that I’m fairly stuck. The only realistic option for escape would be to get an extra key. My wife has solved this option by adding a security seal over the security screw opening. Anytime that it comes off and back on again, a new seal is used and she takes a picture of it’s new serial number. Her threat of blackmail prevents me from tampering with the seals.

As far as being able to have an orgasm in my cage it is possible. But it is fairly painful and difficult to pull off. I’m 7.5” when erect and the inside diameter of my cage is only 7/8”. The cage is positioned right behind the glans so it hurts quite a bit when I attempt to have an erection. Often times when I try to get an errection and I actually manage to get past the constriction pain, the head becomes completely numb and I can’t feel any stimulation so I end up going soft. The opening is just to small and tight. She has also been talking about getting an upgrade to this cage by adding adjustable spikes to make an errection just too painful to ever happen without her permission.

 

.... explore our sexuality without regard to my selfish fulfillment of my own sexual pleasure. She knows all of my sexual energy is directed towards loving & pleasing her and none of it is wasted on myself. I feel safe & secure knowing I can't stray. The unquenchable ache in my groin keeps my focus on her.

This has been a key component of our chastity journey. It's full transparency of my internal struggles sexually. Since she considers masturbation an act of cheating & infidelity, it helps her understand the power of my libido which is so different from hers. Given that my addiction to masturbation goes back to my childhood, she recognizes the need for chastity and a device that is secure. Without that communication & the understanding it brings, she would assume that I should be able to be chaste without the security of the cage.

 

No. Because chastity devices don't prevent masturbation or orgasms. Both can be achieved while wearing a device. Admittedly, they take a different form, but they can still be done. There are many videos of caged orgasms. It's all propaganda. What matters is in your brain, and whether or not you choose to obey your keyholder and refrain from jerking it.

 

It would seem that you are likely missing the point that I and several others are suggesting to you. These devices are merely aids to help with our lifestyle. Just as a blind man wearing glasses cannot see, a deaf man with hearing aids inserted cannot hear, a man wearing a dick cage is not able to be submissive and true to his commitment of chastity if he is not first able to have a strong (and strengthen as needed) mental commitment to being chaste for his wife.
Security is important, but it is only the aid to supplement the mind, without a strong mind even the most determined can fail. Depending solely on the device is akin to the strong man wanting to lift heavier weights than before by putting on a back brace and when he fails he apples an even stronger back brace and fails again. The strong man is failing not because his back brace is “defeat-able” rather he needs to work on methods to strengthen his back. In fact, the stronger a back brace the strong man wears the weaker his back actually becomes.

Talking to your wife as an accountability partner is the exercise to help strengthen your mind so that you stay true to yourself and she KNOWS through your actions that she is in control. IMHO having you in a device that is not defeatable yet your mind weak merely means she has you restrained not controlled. A controlled man does not need outside restraint as the restraint is internal due to the control he is under from his wife.

 

This is why Madam loves my spiked device, my cock would be shredded if I tried to pull out! We both love the idea of having a PA and a compatible device but I’m not cut and also have a unusually thick foreskin. So don’t think I would be PA compatible.

 

I agree! Personally security is very important to me, because I have very little self control in this area.

 

To me, security is important. If there is anything I can do to circumvent the control imposed by my chastity device it spoils the effect for both of us.

I have tried, and rejected, many possible chastity devices that proved to be insecure. I believe my present full belt is secure. I think it would take a while - maybe an hour or two I think - to cut it off and I would probably hurt myself in the process.

The belt is rigid and locked over my pelvis so that very little movement is possible. The end of the tube is pressed close to my groin and the tube is a tight fit, so that pulling out really is impossible. Added to that, I have a blunt pointed pin just inside the top of the tube. My wife absolutely forbids its removal.

As for achieving orgasm with it on, I can't. The lack of movement and the presence of the pin make it impossible. I guess I might have been able to achieve orgasm in spite of these precautions when I was younger, but not now.

Of course, the security of the key is also important. We use an electronic safe. I could see a few ways to break into that, but I think I have closed them off. I think I would probably need something like an angle grinder now. If I did that in our bedroom I doubt we would remain married!

Having said that, I expect there is some weakness or problem that will surface given time, but I have covered all the obvious ones.

 

Have you considered castration? I mean, you can’t just cum when you want in an flr. If you’re unlucky enough that a cage doesn’t stop it then maybe just losing your balls is a good option. The shaft perhaps, but that a little trickier. Probably require a surgeon… but it will be worth it for sure!

 

When my wife discovered that I could easily escape my cage, she was very unhappy. She questioned why she was even holding the keys. Quote, "Why put a criminal in a jail cell that they can walk right out of when nobody is looking?".
Unless I came up with a way to make the cage inescapable (without damage or injuries), she was done with it completely. Soon after I was on the table at the piercing studio getting a PA.
So I'd say security is very important to us.

 

I had my PA for 11 years. Just got into chastity about a year ago. She loves that I can’t pull out. I haven’t and won’t try to pick the lock. I don’t want that in the back of my mind. The only key stays at home in a safe one she has access to.

 

My Wife, and i, feel the same way. Security is a must, in our Female Led Relationship.

 

I can't say I've been a Saint in the past. This new steel device I've been in for a month non-stop, it's snug (see gallery pic). So I've not tried to test it by trying to pull out of it. This is the first line of defence. I could try to have some "me time" and have ball slippage and the cage coming off completely... it's not going back on without cheating with the keys. Etc. We're not going down that path this time. Is my cage defeatable? I don't care and would live the rest of my life not knowing. How do you go from chastity slave to self-serving handyman when not supervised? C'mon we're better than that.

 

I could probably pull out and jerk off, I for sure couldn’t get it back in though. I could probably break the small lock on the wand and use it to vibrate an orgasm out, and I’m denied enough the last couple years that I can hump on my Wife’s bottom and within a minute or two I have a caged orgasm, so I’d think maybe a pillow or something could work too for me to get an orgasm while she’s at work.
So really I’d bet even in a belt or with a PA or whatever shy of having the penis and or testicles removed, man will still find a way to cheat if they desire that path.

Luckily I enjoy staying chaste for my Wife and keeping my commitment to her, the frustration and ache has become the thing I crave now. Plus, my Wife made it very clear what would happen when this became serious for us both, if I cheat and cum without her permission, she’s done living this way. I also know if the frustration becomes too much, I can talk to her, and at some point that she decided, she would grant me some relief in some way. We’re doing this to make our lives better and more fun, so I’m never locked and forgotten.

 

I love the original question. I won’t cheapen it by doing anything other than speaking for myself.

Security of the device only deters me. It does not prevent Masturbation.

Soooooo, my brain has re-defined an orgasm while SUPPOSEDLY locked as a failure and not a success. Cumming in my cage is no pyric (spelling) victory.

So security has been “solved” in my head by my attitude.

 

The idea of my man expending that amount of effort to get himself off and me having to closely monitor his behavior to “discover” if he’s cheating just sounds exhausting and annoying. Like @Queens servant73 said if he is that committed to ‘escaping’ then he can have the key and probably the door. If I can’t trust that he will use the cage as an aid to help him avoid orgasms - something he wanted - then good god what can I trust him with? I expect some serious effort on his part to maintain self control.
However, I would at least once try giving him a serious ass whooping to see if that worked. Has your KH tried that @BBCS2PA? Sounds like you deserve it.

 

Chastity has been and always been about personal responsibility whether it be to a KH or yourself.

 

Not this shit again. It is such a pathetic conversation. Every fucking guy on this thread proclaiming how foolproof their locking system needs to be can self unlock in seconds. These are literally the most pickable locks in the history of locks. Security screws? LOLOLOL. Give me 53 seconds in my workshop. For shits and giggles I took a security torx bit and ground some of the teeth off and put it into an old cage with a "proprietary" security screw- opened right up. With getting the tools out it took 3 min. Can then put right back on with no evidence. No KH is really that dumb to think they have total control physically. The control comes mentally- that is what this is all about. The cage just keeps you honest in the shower or middle of the night when it's oh so easy to cheat. If you really want to cheat- not one man on this site couldn't in a few min.