Couple New to BDSM

Hello all! Not sure the best way to start this journal so here goes! I am a 40 year old sub/slave to my 19 year old girlfriend. We started out in a vanilla relationship about a year ago. Neither of us with any past experience in bdsm. We had a very strong relationship but every so often I would do things which would infuriate Madison and it would put a strain on our relationship. I acknowledged the issues where my fault. After thinking and thinking about ways to deal with this I offered to her, if I do something that you genuinely feel is out of line instead of just bottling things up and being mad, take me and paddle or whip me and explain how i dissapointed you and what behavior you expect in the future. Madison is very open minded and took me up on this. The first couple punishments she was afraid to hurt me or afraid I would be mad and wasn't truly serious about giving her full control to punish me as she felt necessary. After much discussion we decided I needed to be restrained during the punishments to give her full control. A few weeks ago I did something I promised her I would not. Madison had me wear a humbler, put a neck collar with buckle on me which was attached to an eye hook in the floor then cuffed my wrists behind my back. I was essentially immobile with my ass and balls presented for Madison. She used a crop on my balls for a very hard punishment this time. During the punishment she made me apologize, tell her how sorry I was and how my behavior would be improved in the future. My balls were sore for 4 days after this punishment. She admits my behavior has greatly improved since giving her no questions asked discipline privileges. Yesterday I recieved a maintenance punishment in which my wrists and ankles were attached to a spreader bar while in humbler. Madison whipped my balls with the crop and paddled my ass with a paddle to ensure i would be on my best behavior going forward. After this punishment I was given the privilege of licking her to orgasm.

We both feel our relationship is improved and stronger than ever since starting the punishments.

Feel free to ask any questions and offer any constructive criticism or advice. We are here to share and learn. Goddess Madison will also be participating and monitoring this thread.

 

Madison is looking to establish complete control over me as her slave and to be completely obsessed over her. She is extremely attractive and fit so this should not be a difficult task.

I have a PA piercing which is currently at 1 gauge. After it is stretched to 0 gauge we will begin to incorporate a PA secured chastity cage at Madison's discretion.

I am going to continue to try to add as many details about our relationship as possible in the coming days.

 

I have had the pa about 6 months. It is very close to being able to be stretched to 0 gauge. It should happen in the next few days. Then will be ready for cage.

 

To be honest it was very painful and very sore for several days. But I love having it. Goddess Madison loves it. She actually nudged me to get it after I brought up the idea to her. I would without hesitation do it again despite the pain.

 

Speaking of the pa, it was stretched to 0 gauge today which was Madison's primary goal for it. I assume she will want me to start wearing the cage soon. She loves the bigger sizes so I assume she will want it eventually stretched to 00 and 000 gauge but current cage will only work with 0 gauge so I will have to order a new custom if this is the case.

 

Goddess Madison decided I should receive a maintenance punishment. GM cuffed my hands behind my back and ordered me to bend over to present my ass to her on my knees. (GM uncaged my cock at the beginning of the session and recaged at the end.). GM began to paddle my ass as she told me I was lucky I was being paddled and not having my balls cropped. She gave me the privilege of being paddled because I had been on my best behavior. As GM paddled me she asked me questions about my recent behavior. She knows I will tattle on myself while I am being punished if there is anything I have held back. GM continued to paddle me while she interrogated me about my behavior. I have truly been on my best behavior recently so there was nothing to tell. Once GM was satisfied she left my wrists cuffed and have me the privilege of licking her pussy. After I gave her 3 orgasms with my tongue she uncuffed my wrists and allowed me to hold her hips and thrust my cock into her hand and to edge but if I came I would be punished severely. I edged twice. Once was closer than I would prefer. For a split second I thought I may have a ruined orgasm. My cock leaked a lot of precum which I always have to lick up. GM then allowed me to alternate between licking her pussy and kissing her. She said she lost count of orgasms but estimates she used my tongue for 9+ orgasm. After telling GM how much I love her, that she is the most beautiful and most adorable girl in the world she recaged my cock, we kissed some more before vanilla life obligations unfortunately called us back.

 

Today Goddess Madison told me to get the paddle and handcuffs out and ready for her. She seemed edgier today so I knew things would be more intense. She removed the evotion bijou cage from my (her) cock, handcuffed my hands behind my back and told me to get on my knees ass in air. While paddling my ass she interrogated me about my behavior as usual. I love getting attention from the beautiful Goddess Madison but I would not consider myself a masochist so the severe paddling was tough for me. It honestly nearly brought me to tears. If she would have went any harder or longer she would have had to chain my neck to a floor eye hook which she sometimes does with more severe punishments because I would have not been able to hold still for her. Once Goddess was satisfied with my answers she kept me cuffed and directed me to lick her pussy to several orgasms. Goddess then asked me if I would like to thrust my (her) cock into her hand but not cum in exchange for more paddles. My ass was already very sore but I knew it was my only chance of being able to edge so I agreed to more paddles. Once Goddess was satisfied the second time I was permitted to fuck her hand while on my knees. After I edged twice i licked up all the leaked precum and thanked Goddess for graciously giving her cock attention. I was too afraid to edge more because if I cum without permission I would receive an extra severe punishment. Goddess allowed me to kiss her which I took full advantage of and also to suck on her absolutely PERFECT 19 year old tits. I again thanked Goddess for allowing me such privileges then she returned my (her) cock to the cage.

 

In the last day I messed up a couple times in my speech with Goddess. I refered to my balls as mine (GM only permits me to refer to them as hers as she does have ownership) and failed to address her as Goddess. Overall she felt I was disrespectful toward her which she has a zero tolerance policy towards. I had to be handcuffed the entire time in her presence today. Goddess Madison ordered me immediately to my knees and to bend over to display my ass for paddling. GM paddled me very while making me tell her how I had been disrespectful to her and how sorry I was and how my behavior would improve in the future. My ass is very sore and will definately bruise more as it was already a little bruised from yesterdays paddling. I did try to squirm away a few times during the paddling but GM would just paddle harder or paddle my legs which hurts even worse. At one point I begged her to please stop but she explained I was her property and she would paddle as long and as hard as she saw fit. After the paddling GM uncaged my cock and allowed me to make out with her while remaining handcuffed. She also briefly allowed me to pump my cock into her hand and suck on her absolutely perfect tits. After some more amazing kissing GM recaged my cock. I unfortunately won't be able to see GM over the weekend as she is spending time with her girlfriend. I will actually be busy all weekend but I am not looking forward to being caged and not getting any attention from GM. She made it clear her girlfriend would be licking her delicious pussy all weekend while my cock was caged.

 

Today Goddess Madison ordered me completely naked, then handcuffed my hands behind my back and placed a blindfold on me. Goddess proceeded to interrogate me during a very hard paddling session. I was good since the last paddling so there wasn't anything to confess to. Goddess will not allow me to kiss her or to have my cock stroked or any other attention from her unless I first endure a punishment to show how needy and desperate I am for her. After the paddling Goddess Madison uncaged my cock and stroked it while allowing me to suck on her amazing breasts. Goddess kept me blindfolded during this. She then asked me if I would like to kiss her. I was obviously very desperate to kiss her so I said yes. She informed me I would have to be further paddled first so after I received a couple more minutes of paddles we made out but I remained handcuffed, blindfolded and naked. After about 10 minutes of making out Goddess Madison removed my blindfold. We continued to kiss but she would playfully move around the room and make me chase her from time to time or move slightly just as I was about to kiss her which was super fun and frustrating since I was handcuffed. After Goddess had enough fun for one day with me she recaged my cock then uncuffed my wrists from behind me. I was surprised she didn't want me to lick her pussy but she told me that her girlfriend had done that nearly all weekend. The kisses strokes to my cock were amazing but also frustrating being restrained.

 

This morning before my workout Goddess Madison wanted to evaluate my body progress and for me to worship her by edging to her beautiful face. Goddess ordered me to strip naked then uncaged her cock. GM remained fully clothed in non revealing clothing and ordered me to edge for her. While edging I told her how beautiful and adorable she is. The last edge was closer to orgasm than I would have preferred but I was thankfully able to hold it back because if not Goddess Madison would have made me eat all of the cum then crop my balls very severely. Goddess told me she is happy with the way my body is taking shape. She has has me on a very strict diet and exercise program. She then recaged my cock after I thanked her for allowing me to edge to her beautiful face. I then went to do my first of two workouts for the day.

 

Today a female acquaintance started flirting with me. She frequently does this. I did not keep enough space between her and I for Goddess Madison's liking so after the interaction she informed me she would be cropping my balls later. GM ordered me naked and asked me if I needed to be restrained for her to crop my balls. I knew I would not be able to stay still and not jump around from the hard crops which would result in even more crops so I told her it would be best if I was at least handcuffed. So after I was naked, on my knees and handcuffed Goddess began to crop my balls while having me explain how I disrespected her by not rebuking the females advances enough earlier and how my behavior would change for the better in the future. At one point I believe I was squealing and crying because of the severe cropping but my recollection is a little blurry due to pain. After Goddess felt I had been adequately punished I thanked her for cropping my balls and teaching me to show her proper respect. Goddess Madison then blindfolded me and had me lick her delicious pussy over and over while remaining handcuffed. Goddess said I did an extra good job licking her so she uncaged my cock and allowed me to thrust into her hand while making out with her. Goddess edged me 3 times before recaging my cock. Goddess Madison allowed me to make out with her (she was fully clothed, I was nude) until I had to leave for a meeting.