...apart from when it comes to three specific balls - left, right and foot. For the avoidance of doubt, when it comes to football - (North) London is and always will be, red. As to the other two, well yes and and no. Unfortunately at the moment it seems I keep suffering from the bad kind of blue... At lunchtime today after a steady build up of pain that eventually became too much to bear I had to take off my device, bringing to a halt what up until this point had been the longest time I’d spent being locked up. Sure enough, around my sack was a faint band of bruising. I’d probably been sat awkwardly given the sudden need to remove the ring but after telling my wife I’d taken it off and why, my first thoughts were how long before I could get it back on - apart from this particular incident my device has been almost perfect in terms of comfort. That’s where I am now and this journal is to help me record my journey.
So after I had completed some chores outside this morning, the wife made it clear she was unhappy that I was still out of the device. Cue a long hot shower, and after the usual struggles to put it on I was back safely inside my cage. I think yesterday’s issues have gone - there’s none of the pain, just that dull ache associated with frustration. Things are probably only going to get worse on that front - we had a delivery today, a replacement charger for her toy which we’ve not been able to use for a while. Last night I had what felt like the biggest erection and was so tempted to do something about it. Thankfully I behaved myself and hopefully I will get a nice reward later...
It has been a frustrating (hah!) couple of weeks. It’s now almost three weeks since we last played and I was allowed to cum. During that time I have had real problems trying to get my cage back on and then keeping it on. After the last issue with apparent bruising I was able to get back in but had to take the device off the next morning. For about a week afterwards I was then physically unable to get the device on - my balls were most reluctant to hang loose enough. OK I thought, maybe they did need more of a rest after the bruising incident and was happy to delay. Last Wednesday they decided to behave though so all was good, until about two hours later when they decided to position themselves in a way I’d never seen before. Rather than being elongated left to right, they were elongated through 90 degrees, back to front (if that makes sense). Sure enough there was associated level of discomfort that told me this wasn’t right and so off came the cage. once again I couldn’t get the device back on as the balls showed more resistance than France in WWII. Last night it went back on, only for me to pop out whilst sat down an hour or so later. I had hoped that the extended lockdown offered the opportunity for extended lock up but it seems this isn’t panning out. Also the missus has been ill (no not that) over the past few days so everything feels a bit ”meh” at the moment.
After my last update that was a bit of a downer, things are better. With the exception of taking the cage off for less than a minute to re-lube and re-adjust my balls, I have been locked up since Monday, and have now not cum for around a month which I think is the longest I have ever gone. Me and my wife had a chat whilst in bed last night and were talking about previous relationships and whether or not we would have been able to survive this coronavirus lockdown with those partners. She ended up saying that one of the reasons we work so well is that she doesn’t want an FLR but that in the bedroom, she is the boss. There was a sense of relief for me as I always felt FLR wasn’t something she was capable of but never knew if she had known too. As a result I always had a nagging doubt I was letting the side down. Funny eh - 10 years of being with someone and you still learn things about them... She also said that she loved me wearing my cage and being in charge of my orgasms I always have to ask permission anyway. She has never asked for or held the key though, in case I need to take the cage off due to pain, which has happened a few times. I said I would like her to take a key and that I could keep the other available to me in a tamper-evident place. We struck a deal! We then spent a couple of hours looking for some new lingerie and stockings for her and a new locking collar for me before she decided some T&D and a bit of ball slapping was in order with instructions to seriously impress her if I have any expectation of a happy ending tonight... I’m in .
I'm not saying that this is an issue that might affect you but just incase be aware of this..... The word torsion means “to twist.” Testicular torsion is when a man's testicle twists around. The motion also twists the spermatic cord that connects to the testicle. This cord contains vessels that carry blood to the testicle. Torsion can slow or cut off blood flow to the testicle. A lack of blood makes the affected testicle swell up and become painful. Testicular torsion is a medical emergency. You need to be treated as soon as possible to prevent infertility and other complications, and to save the testicle. What Causes It? The two testes sit in a pouch that hangs below the penis. It’s called the scrotum. The spermatic cord connects the testicles to the body. Normally, the testicles are attached to the inside of the scrotum so they don't move around. Some men are born without the tissue that holds their testicles in place. Without this tissue, their testicles are free to move around inside the scrotum. This is called a bell clapper deformity. Newborns can get testicular torsion because the connecting tissue hasn't yet formed. Testicular torsion is very rare. It usually affects boys between the ages of 12 and 16, but it can happen at any age.
Thank you - that’s an interesting read. It was the first time anything had happened like that. I had put it down to the way I had been sitting and the shorts I had been wearing. Definitely something to watch out for. It’s amazing how being caged can go from feeling wonderful and comfortable to major discomfort when just being sat down.
On Monday night I had reached one week of lock up which was a milestone for me - the longest so far. The only let up was a maintenance removal that lasted for about a minute. I was experiencing a bit of chafing under the balls and my wife suggested I take my cage off for sleeping but with instructions to put it back on in the morning. She clearly had an ulterior motive however. I was woken up by her given me a blow job that was amazing apart from a lack of orgasm. Frustrated and with a huge erection I was left to go back to sleep, only to be awoken an hour or so later by her wandering hands squeezing and stroking. After a while she pulled the duvet down below my waist, which normally signifies I am going to be allowed to cum. Not on this occasion however, as I found out In no uncertain terms after asking for permission. Instead, she started slapping, scratching and twisting until one of her nails managed to draw blood from the ball sac. At that point play was stopped by my yelping and somewhat fortunately for me she didn’t insist I was re-caged in the morning.
After what seemed an age I locked myself back up on Saturday. I still have access to one of the two keys. My wife had been asking/telling me to lock up for a while but the recovery from her scratching activity above took longer than I hoped. Also I was being a bit selfish and not fully embracing her wants in this regard but remaining chaste nonetheless. Anyway I had had a number of attempts at trying to get the ring on. My nutsac kept insisting on playing hardball - pun intended - every time the ring went near it, even in the shower and I failed miserably. Until Saturday just gone, that is. BOOM! On it went and boy did it feel good! Normally at least once a day or every other day I need to unlock the cage to readjust or apply some lube before re-locking. This time though, no fuss, no drama, no lube even. I managed to stay comfortably locked from lunchtime Saturday until last night when I sensed I needed to have a better cleaning attempt given the current heat and the fact I’ve been sat at my desk most of the week. Three observations here are that ; 1) I normally do not wear pants when locked up as I found the balls chafe badly. Since I am usually only locked at home I always find being naked or in loose fitting tracksuit trousers or shorts the only feasible options. However this time I was able to wear pants and shorts, even when sitting. Usually this is a no no... 2) I did not use any lube and the ring felt fine. No chafing, no sliding. I even got to the point where I felt I could drop from a 50 to a 45 mm ring. The difference seemed that the device was not constantly moving around as a result of a lack of lube. 3) The device, in particular the ring, sat a little bit (~5-10 mm) further down the shaft than normal, which helped remove some pinching from underneath the sac. Needless to say the wife was very happy when I surprised her getting into bed on Saturday. Last night I asked if she would like to use her key to unlock while I showered and she jumped at the chance. She was ready and waiting to lock me back up afterwards too. I made the decision to not risk taking the ring off, and I continue to be comfortably locked up and the need to cum is now causing leaks to start. All in all happy days.
“Go have a shower, and then those...” [wrist cuffs], “those...”, [ankle cuffs], “that...” [collar], “that...” [gag], “that...” [blindfold], “and that.” [length of metal chain]. So started our play session last night with instructions to put on or to present indicated items to her. The night before we’d had an interesting conversation where I found out my wife gets more of a rush from seeing me in some kind of distress as she is teasing and denying than she does from climaxing. Orgasms were always a secondary purpose for her. Who knew!? We have a very good relationship with open dialogue and yet this nugget of information remained hidden. Maybe that’s why she rarely indulges me in one of my pleasures by climbing aboard the good ship Tongue whilst I am restrained under her? Anyway with our new found knowledge, last night’s session veered more towards CBT than teasing. Once I was restrained she took my cage off and then there was heat rub, a stabby thing (turned out to be something for her hair), heavy ball massage and a new one for us - ice and ice cold water. That was a surprise! My first thought were “oh shit - that’s the ring popping off due to shrunken balls”, but it stayed on. There was little risk of unauthorised orgasm on my part because of the pain throughout the play. Feels like her inner sadist has been awakened! In another new for me, it felt like I *had* had an orgasm as I felt completely mellow and as she put it, ‘smiley’ afterwards. Then it was back to being locked up and being a true Brit, I went made us both a nice cup of tea.
We have always used common sense with my wearing chastity devices - I've always held a key and can make the call as to whether I want/need to take it off. After the session referred to in my previous post I left the ring on but slept with the cage off. In the morning I re-attached the cage. An hour or so later I had developed a burning sensation under the balls that wouldn't disappear. It got progressively worse and eventually I took the ring off. Sure enough there was a bit of a raw patch developing. I could have persevered but figured since I was going to shave the area today I might as well do it free of obstructions. When my wife awoke I told her I had had to take the ring off. She said it was fine but that I should have asked for her permission first. This was a new rule and one that made my heart skip a beat. She said there would have to be a punishment for not asking. So last night she administered her first punishment - a flogging. We've had a flogger in our kit for ever but never used it properly. I was blindfolded, gagged and restrained face down on the bed and then she set to work. Afterwards she said she really liked using the flogger and that it would feature more frequently from here on in. The only downside for her she said, was that I was feeling mellow and relaxed afterwards. During the night at around 3 am I felt her reaching round to have a feel of her uncaged toy and thus began a long edging session that was simply immense and the earlier downside was alleviated fully. I sit here this morning tired, frustrated and with a couple of tender bum cheeks. Wow. What a woman!
Well it's over a year since I posted here and to be honest very little relating to the lifestyle that's good has happened. One exception to this - and a very positive one I am pleased to say, is that my wife has joined this site. We've always been kink focussed - we actually met online via Informed Consent and whilst she was obviously involved with my chastity she wasn't actually aware of this site. We had a conversation recently to address some issues we were facing caused by life in general. I had finally plucked up the courage to speak openly and honestly about wanting to introduce some element of FLR as a way to reinforce my submission to her. Me being me, it was based on gathered evidence and facts from other behaviours which fortunately made my arguments more plausible and genuine. We had spoken before about FLR and had agreed it wasn't for us; preferring my submission to remain in the bedroom, but for me, it had become clear there needed to be some changes in that regard. Unfortunately I had let those thoughts fester a while and the longer I left it the harder it became to talk about them. My main arguments were: In order to remain focussed on any task, I generally need to to able to gauge progress. Be this via a graph, spreadsheet, checklist etc. Without that I lose focus, and get distracted. It's how my internal wiring is configured and it's evident to see throughout my life. I need a ritual to transition my mindset from outside, especially from work, to indoors. Our home should be a haven; a sanctuary away from the stresses of work (from which I have suffered mentally in the past). It's just the two of us, so our home is what we make it. I need a ritual to re-enforce my submission to her. I can take a lot of pressure before something trivial causes me to transform into a mushroom cloud laying motherfucker. I find it difficult not to be annoyed by and get shouty at things in life, and then immediately forget them to become a bedroom submissive. By having the submission enforced outside the bedroom it grows my submissive behaviour proportionally. I had felt that there was little consequence of me having an off-day or not being the sub she deserved or that I could easily top from the bottom. To help stop these she would need to take responsibility for enforcing those rituals. To her credit, she listened and asked questions as she always does, and then thankfully agreed to give things a go. Between us we drew up a short list of household chores that I would assume responsibility for (these address my need for accountability by being able to mark things off). Her main kink is male chastity and orgasm control so one ritual is that I will always be locked up when at home (wearing at work isn't practical). I must ask her to unlock me in the morning before leaving and present myself once locked in the evening. I told her about this site and she said she would sign up, which she has (looking at you, @DominaFire ) I must address her as Domina when at home. We have agreed a weekly review session where my performance is evaluated. We have agreed there will be reward or punishment depending upon the outcome of the review. Compared with some on this site these may seem like nothing but every journey begins with the first step. FLR is new to us and we want it to strike a balance of being manageable but effective. We're very good at talking with each other but I still feel a bit awkward really opening up (even after 12 years and filthy sex together). After our conversation I really did feel like a huge weight had been lifted from my shoulders, due in no small part to Domina's willingness to listen and her understanding of my needs. I'm a very lucky man.
So marking the end of our first week as FLR, I got to spin @DominaFire's 'Wheel of Fortune' to select my random treat for being good and completing my chores. She has chosen 9 treats, all of them unknown to me. I spin the wheel and whichever number it lands on, references my treat. So drum roll please... I end up with...#5, which turns out to be a big fat nothing! Better luck next time JellyBaby! At least I now know at least one of the nine! The question is, will the numbers always be the same or ill they change from week to week??? It wouldn't surprise me if there were 8 'nothings' and 1 'spin again'
I am writing this to publicly apologise to @DominaFire for not being able to control myself better (at all). It all began so well. She had me put on ankle and wrist cuffs, before locking my collar on, gagging me and blindfolding me. I was then fastened securely to the four corners of the bed before she unlocked and removed my cage. After amusing herself by tormenting me with ice cubes and alternating with a hot flannel, she got to work with a vibrator which I have to say I enjoyed immensely. Eventually she climbed on board and started to ride the good ship penis. This was good for a few minutes, when suddenly out of nowhere I had the sudden urge to come. Normally there is some warning that things are close and I have to ask her to stop or at least indicate that I am close. This time however, BOOM! I had about a two second warning and by the time I realised, I was caught between trying to hold it back, and to figure out how to signal (given I was boun, gagged and blindfolded) that I was close. Needless to say I failed. The only redemption for me was that I ruined it for myself by trying to hold it back. So I apologise @DominaFire for letting you down. Rest assured, I shall think on.