Maybe a poll like this has been done before, if so, excuse me for not giving the forum a proper search Lately I've been talking to a few men around here, and what interested me is that if I ask someone "What is chastity for you", I get so many different answers. It intrigues me that something as 'simple' as locking up a cock can have so many different meanings. So what I would love to know from you chaste boys (and girls?) What is chastity for you? Of course it can serve many purposes, but try to think what the single most important things is for you personally. If I find out I'm missing an option that a lot of people would go for I'll add it, so please let me know.
There were multiple things on your list I wanted to check but could only pick one, so I pick the mostest. I picked showing my dedication. But a few others are big factors and benefits that were part of why it was easier to sell. Being able to physically trust someone will never cheat as well as emotionally was huge. My Os are now crazy but I didn't know that before. It's not useless to me but it doesn't feel like mine anymore. In the other section I would put communication...makes talking about my wants and needs easier. Lastly I would put down obligation. I now know that every single time we are sexual, it is because she wants it not just me.
i started chastity to curb masturbation, this was teh answer i chose. however now it is much much more for me. Both the additional security to guarantee I don't cheat as well as giving up control of my orgasms and pleasure for the love of my wife.
I voted "Giving up control of my cock/balls/pleasure/orgasms to show my dedication as a submissive" because that's probably the biggest reason, at least currently. But, truthfully, all of the above! Or at least all but the cheating one - my wife and I both know I won't cheat on her ever.
When I thought about this I could have answered this with any one of several of them. When we first started down chastity road it was to control my masturbation. With time and my Wife noticing the changes within me, she became more and more involved in my chastity. Which lead to present day and now I look at being in chastity to give her control and show her my dedication and submissiveness to her and only her. We often talk how she now holds the keys and owns any sexual activities I may be involved in. It's not that my locked cock is useless, it's just useless until she desires to use it, as she says she owns it. Through this journey we have rediscovered sexual tease and closeness that may have been missing. When released and allowed out her toy is so sensitive it doesn't take long and my Orgasm, which is not to often, is explosive. So you see several of the comments could have applied, but the box that I checked was giving up control to show my dedication and submissiveness. Everything else that occurs comes from her being in control.
Chastity for me started as a way to cover up my penis so my Wife wouldn't have to see it but now it has become much, much more. It is really hard to describe the 'what' it is as it is so nuanced for us. It is the very fabric of our relationship now. It has become the bedrock of everything we do together and the way we see both each other but also our future, the world, our ambitions and progress. I voted 'other' as none of them really match, but the closest would be the dedication one.
For me wearing a cock cage (that is not exactly chastity) is a way to humiiate myself, and also to spice-up sex (without any penetration from my side...!) with willingly women. I also love to be with persons that know I am caged, my manhood annihilated, me rendered useless as a male...
Being naturally submissive it was the additional or ultimate control that my wife would have over my orgasms that was so appealing particularly as we had discovered how much more enjoyable making love was when my wife took control.
Ditto - Giving up control to show submissive dedication as primary but for us spicing up sex in intensifying orgasms was a close second.
That poll needs an "all of the above" botton. But this is the best way I could express what "Chastity" means to me. "Chastity is a strong and uncontrollable emotion, it is a world where expectations are not set by the stereotypes that hold us back, but by sexual passions that drive our cravings." (Unknown Author)
I voted for giving up control to show dedication, although at our start it was for masturbation control as well.I've always had a desire for as long as I can remember to be led around/bosses around by a strong woman. I didn't understand my true desire and feelings for chastity until recently. I realized my wife needed to be in control of my sexuality and now I've never been more content. There has been several bumps in the road to figuring all of this out and there has been the trials of life that we've had to work through. It feels right to sit at my wife's side while she takes the lead.
@popperslut & @cogman I deliberately did not add an 'all of the above' option, because I think that if one really things about it, there is always one option that sticks out as being the most important one in your relation/life. I understand that for a lot of people chastity is about a lot of things, and maybe it serves all of the purposes above, but in the end there's one things that it all boils down to. Thanks everybody who has already voted, interesting to see the results!
As a very submissive gurl, chastity for me is giving up control and to get a constant reminder of my orientation and status, but it also increases my appetite for sex. My wife has not (yet) taken control over my clitty, but she accepts that it is locked because my hunger for her increases a lot when my clitty is locked. I would like to be locked and denied for a long periode of time (months), but my wife is not there yet. So, chastity for me is the opposite of orgasm denial, it is orgasm stimulation
Hmm so looking at the options it's tempting to put down option a - control masturbation. However when I think about it that isn't really why I do it. The real reason I think I do it is I its fun/pleasurable to be in chastity (at least while I feel like a sub). It speaks to hedonist in me when I'm a submissive. I know that it has to be a part of submission to another - I gain no pleasure from self locking. I do not feel my cock is worthless and deserves chastity.ncheating is not (and never has been) an issue for me. Neither would I say it's all about getting more pleasure from my next orgasm. I know it will be amazing but if that was why I was doing it I'd just lock myself up for a few days and then play with myself. A sign of dedication as a submissive? Well I don't think so, perhaps in part because I don't think of myself as a submissive just that I can have submissive tendencies. I think it's more something I do because it is inherently pleasurable to me on some level and I find a KH for whom that is also the case (I think,month want to be accused of speaking for @LadyFedora ). A game we can play and both have fun with. Of course that leads to deeper submission and that is pleasurable in another way but I wouldn't say it's the driving factor. That being said this time I did rather beg to be locked up to control masturbation and because I felt especially submissive at the time I wanted to give away control. But I think the underlying reason was still a hedonistic pleasure from indulging in my fantasies and knowing my KH will gain the same.
I like being denied so as my stimulation and orgasms will be stronger down the road. In chastity I don't think I should watch porn or tease myself, unless told so by a key holder. Other wise thier is no stimulation, but self locking makes that tough.
Hard to vote since we got into chastity for more than one reason. We started with masturbation control and then went to teasing and denial. When the denial periods got longer we went to locking me up in a chastity cage. My wife really does not dominate me. Once in a while she will ask me to do something that I normally do not do, but she asks and does not tell me. For us chastity is a sex game that we both enjoy and agree to. We discuss things that work and do not work. We want to keep it fun for both of us.
I was also torn between "giving up control" and "something extra to spice up the sex life". I went with "something extra" in the end as that's what's happening now/recently. I remember being utterly appalled at my first sight of a cock-cage. I had zero interest. None. But at the time I was struggling with my fascination with Femdom. I just don't naturally have many/any submissive feelings at all. For me it is all about the Domme. I find Domme's so incredibly sexy, far more than anything else. It was a hard adjustment to get my head around, that the thing that turned me on the very most was going to require me to be submissive in order to fully get "the hit" (no pun intended). Nowadays I actually get turned on by being submissive, but I could never do it outside of my marriage. I am lucky in that I have 200% trust in my wife. With chastity the turning point, out of the blue was reading a Femdom novel where the wife locks the husband up against his will and they proceed to have very frequent sex with her teasing him and he orally pleasuring her. That was it. Holy crap the sparked something and all my natural objections went out the window. It was probably 6 to 9 months before i then got the courage to buy a cage. I remember my wife watching me fit it for the first time and her saying "are you sure you want to do this, you are shaking like a leaf!".
I wanted to vote one third "Giving up control" and two thirds "Something extra to spice it up". I live a busy life with work, air travel and family. Wearing it all the time is just not a practical option and, quite frankly, I think it would actually lose something if it were a 24/7 thing. My wife and I play with the power dynamic of it. She knows it's effect on me and we have fun with it. Going furniture shopping (which I hate) -- she's likely to put me in my Jailbird before heading out
Chastit for started out as a "Hummm how would this feel?" It was solo at the start. Of course going through a few cages to find one that fit right. In that time I had got together with my current girlfriend, and didn't tell her about it. (I'm typically more dominant than she is, and told her about my kinks in bondage, other than chastity.) But after a while of sneaking around wearing my cage through the workday, I though I'd approach her about it. She didn't run away, but both agreed that it was a good way for us to spice up our sex life (my poll choice). We haven't had much play with it lately. Partly due to her fear that it hurts me (my night time erections) and also a small medical problem I'm dealing with. But talks lately are indicating that when I have the all clear, I'll be back in it for a little while.
It's amazing how often "medical" problems can affect chastity play. Even if it is totally nothing to do with your groin/penis it can still pose major problems. When you go to a Dr or to any sort of body therapist it's an issue.
I was dealing with a running injury, and every time I went to see someone, my girlfrien made sure I was unlocked so that it was never discovered. Plus 1 is a good friend of ours... and we don't want it known. She's cautious about it when it comes to being discovered. Although I've played like I "Forgot" the key a few times and sent her panicking... lol