Oh boy, I hope I know what I'm doing.

Discussion in 'Introductions' started by Riker's Beard, Jan 25, 2017.

Top Posters
Page 1 of 2
  1. Riker's Beard
    Offline

    Riker's Beard Rikers Beard

    Joined:
    Jan 25, 2017
    Messages:
    28
    Likes Received:
    24
    Trophy Points:
    3
    Gender:
    Male
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    US
    Local Time:
    12:01 AM
    #1 Riker's Beard, Jan 25, 2017
    [​IMG]

    I sent this to my wife of seven years this morning. I can't stop masturbating when she's not around and I'm looking for a way to have her be in more control of my organisms.

    She said "Yes, we can talk about it tonight."
     
  2. Riker's Beard
    Offline

    Riker's Beard Rikers Beard

    Joined:
    Jan 25, 2017
    Messages:
    28
    Likes Received:
    24
    Trophy Points:
    3
    Gender:
    Male
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    US
    Local Time:
    12:01 AM
    #2 Riker's Beard, Jan 25, 2017
    Opps. Image didn't work.

    Here's the text -

    First off. I love you. So much it hurts sometimes. I have something I want to talk to you about tonight. I know you will have questions. I know you will think it is weird. But I want to talk about getting me a chastity device.

    I need to release some control to you so that I don't feel as much pressure and anxiously about our sexlife. I feel like I have two sex lives. One when you're here and one when you're not and that's making me feel bad. I just want you. And only you.

    You've always been so great about trying new things. Don't think I haven't appreciated it. There's a lot to this and it's going to involve you taking the lead a bit more.

    If it's ok with you, I would love to have you get totally naked and cuddle with me and we can talk about this tonight.

    If you say "No, I'm not into this." I will be totally ok with it as it can only work if we both do it together.

    I love you.

    You can text me a response. I just didn't want this to preview on your screen.
     
    richard likes this.
  3. Wendygirl
    Offline

    Wendygirl To offer advice and keep CM safe and welcoming

    Joined:
    Jul 31, 2013
    Messages:
    3,360
    Likes Received:
    2,462
    Trophy Points:
    153
    Gender:
    Female
    Occupation:
    gardener
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    London
    Local Time:
    8:01 AM
    #3 Wendygirl, Jan 25, 2017
    Lol so what happened ?????

    Xx Wendy
     
    Riker's Beard likes this.
  4. Riker's Beard
    Offline

    Riker's Beard Rikers Beard

    Joined:
    Jan 25, 2017
    Messages:
    28
    Likes Received:
    24
    Trophy Points:
    3
    Gender:
    Male
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    US
    Local Time:
    12:01 AM
    #4 Riker's Beard, Jan 25, 2017
    I'll let you know after we talk tonight. Wish me luck.

    Any tips on things to say?
     
  5. Riker's Beard
    Offline

    Riker's Beard Rikers Beard

    Joined:
    Jan 25, 2017
    Messages:
    28
    Likes Received:
    24
    Trophy Points:
    3
    Gender:
    Male
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    US
    Local Time:
    12:01 AM
    #5 Riker's Beard, Jan 25, 2017
    I hate my smartphone
     
  6. Nicoftime
    Offline

    Nicoftime The suspense is terrible...I hope it lasts

    Joined:
    May 24, 2016
    Messages:
    5,280
    Likes Received:
    14,209
    Trophy Points:
    143
    Gender:
    Male
    Occupation:
    Railroad
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    South of Lacrosse Wisconsin
    Home Page:
    Local Time:
    2:01 AM
    #6 Nicoftime, Jan 25, 2017
    Welcome and congrats, she is open enough to say she wants to talk about it.

    Tip 1. Do not try explaining all the wonderful things you will do when locked and horny, she will be upset that you need to be locked to treat her well. It might be true but it doesn't sound right to her.
    Tip 2. You need help, ask for it. You need help controlling your orgasms so that she is your primary focus instead of you. This is going to be work for her so don't act like you are doing her a favor. Tell her you still want her need her and want help communicating your needs.
    Tip 3. If she does go for it, talk about your expectations, but don't go hog wild and tell her ever dirty thing you want her to do to you.
    Tip 4. Don't drive from the passenger seat, tell her that she is in control of the lock, how often it gets unlocked is totally up to her and don't keep pestering her about it. She will know how horny you are.

    Start there and through communication and a lot of frustration filled courage, you will be able to work out the details as time goes by.

    Good luck.
     
    traveler and Riker's Beard like this.
  7. Vinny
    Offline

    Vinny Locked up again. Starting year 6.

    Joined:
    Jul 24, 2014
    Messages:
    1,879
    Likes Received:
    1,668
    Trophy Points:
    143
    Local Time:
    3:01 AM
    #7 Vinny, Jan 25, 2017
    Actually I found a very good letter online and emailed that to my wife. She was touched by it and thought I wrote it. I did not correct her. :) That is how we got started on our 4 year experiment in chastity. The most difficult part of chastity is actually getting your wife to agree to it.
     
    Thatguyontheinternet and Riker's Beard like this.
  8. Jblocked
    Offline

    Jblocked Long term member

    Joined:
    Jul 24, 2015
    Messages:
    690
    Likes Received:
    522
    Trophy Points:
    103
    Gender:
    Male
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    Buffalo NY US
    Local Time:
    3:01 AM
    #8 Jblocked, Jan 25, 2017
    Good luck hope you're joining the club.
     
    Riker's Beard likes this.
  9. Riker's Beard
    Offline

    Riker's Beard Rikers Beard

    Joined:
    Jan 25, 2017
    Messages:
    28
    Likes Received:
    24
    Trophy Points:
    3
    Gender:
    Male
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    US
    Local Time:
    12:01 AM
    #9 Riker's Beard, Jan 25, 2017
    These are great suggestions! Thank you, yes, I plan on going slow it's taken more than a year to get to this point. My main expectation is that I don't want to cum unless she is involved. I'm just too frustrated with trying to stop myself. As stupid as it sounds for a 46 year old man to say. I JUST CAN'T STOP. I have literally wished my balls would fall off so I could move on with my life. But I also have a beautiful, smart and sexy wife that I love and love to be with.

    I don't know if this is the solution, but I've been thinking about it for a while. Love the advice! Keep it coming! And thank you!
     
  10. Riker's Beard
    Offline

    Riker's Beard Rikers Beard

    Joined:
    Jan 25, 2017
    Messages:
    28
    Likes Received:
    24
    Trophy Points:
    3
    Gender:
    Male
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    US
    Local Time:
    12:01 AM
    #10 Riker's Beard, Jan 26, 2017
    We had a good talk. She held my balls while we cuddled naked. She said "Yes" but with some caveats.

    She's good with locking me up while she's not around, but doesn't want Mr locked up when she is.

    She's worried about my hygiene down there when I am locked up at work. I'm uncircumcised, and I do a good job of keeping myself clean. She's not into me having a smelly wanker.

    Overall, she has some concerns, but is not opposed to the idea. I'm going to keep doing baby steps. I think right now we will fall into the "playing around with chastity" category.

    More to come...
     
    lock667 and Jblocked like this.
  11. DonnaSue
    Offline

    DonnaSue Long term member

    Joined:
    Mar 17, 2015
    Messages:
    2,953
    Likes Received:
    4,712
    Trophy Points:
    143
    Gender:
    Male
    Occupation:
    Retired
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    Southeast US
    Local Time:
    2:01 AM
    #11 DonnaSue, Jan 26, 2017
    I am only locked up when Mistress is at work and unlocked when She gets home (assuming that I have completed my chore list). This situation has worked really well for us. We have developed quite a ritual each morning when She locks me up, gives me a little tug and tells me how She is in control of my sex and I better not forget it! Your wife's suggestion can work well - whether its just a phase or a more permanent setup.
     
    NikNakonCrack and Riker's Beard like this.
  12. JiL
    Offline

    JiL servitude4u

    Joined:
    Sep 7, 2016
    Messages:
    1,004
    Likes Received:
    1,204
    Trophy Points:
    133
    Gender:
    Male
    Occupation:
    Professional
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    southeastern mass.
    Local Time:
    3:01 AM
    #12 JiL, Jan 26, 2017
    It sounds like things will get better for you, and your going to be happier and enjoy life at least a little more than in the past. She obviously loves you and has begun to accept her role in this change. Wish you all the best.
     
  13. Riker's Beard
    Offline

    Riker's Beard Rikers Beard

    Joined:
    Jan 25, 2017
    Messages:
    28
    Likes Received:
    24
    Trophy Points:
    3
    Gender:
    Male
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    US
    Local Time:
    12:01 AM
    #13 Riker's Beard, Jan 26, 2017
    Thank you. I ordered a Rikers with a pad lock. I know it's not the top of the line. But she suggested we see how it goes before we start dropping $300.

    I measured this morning and came up with this -

    Head - 37.5mm
    Shaft / testicles - 70mm

    I used some hose and marked at what I thought was tight. I've been told I'm girthy in the past. Plus I'm uncut.

    I'm shaking in so excited.
     
    Jblocked likes this.
  14. Nicoftime
    Offline

    Nicoftime The suspense is terrible...I hope it lasts

    Joined:
    May 24, 2016
    Messages:
    5,280
    Likes Received:
    14,209
    Trophy Points:
    143
    Gender:
    Male
    Occupation:
    Railroad
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    South of Lacrosse Wisconsin
    Home Page:
    Local Time:
    2:01 AM
    #14 Nicoftime, Jan 26, 2017
    Careful on the length, it should be a bit shorter than you than when you are at your shortest. 70mm seems like a long cage. Then again I don't know how you measured etc.

    The Amazon steel cages usually measure the cage itself, not tip to base ring. My cage is 52mm and is about 7 mm too long but is workable. Any longer and I would need a different cage.
     
  15. Riker's Beard
    Offline

    Riker's Beard Rikers Beard

    Joined:
    Jan 25, 2017
    Messages:
    28
    Likes Received:
    24
    Trophy Points:
    3
    Gender:
    Male
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    US
    Local Time:
    12:01 AM
    #15 Riker's Beard, Jan 26, 2017
    Opps. I didn't do length. I'm a grower, so it's not real long flaccid. 7" when my wife is naked. I'm more worried about the thickness and my foreskin.

    I'll know tonight. Amazon sales kinky things and has same day shipping!
     
  16. Nicoftime
    Offline

    Nicoftime The suspense is terrible...I hope it lasts

    Joined:
    May 24, 2016
    Messages:
    5,280
    Likes Received:
    14,209
    Trophy Points:
    143
    Gender:
    Male
    Occupation:
    Railroad
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    South of Lacrosse Wisconsin
    Home Page:
    Local Time:
    2:01 AM
    #16 Nicoftime, Jan 26, 2017
    Measure underneath the penis from where it joins your sack, this is where the back of cage rests, to the tip of your penis when completely flacid, then shorten it by 5 mm or so.

    I'm cut but heard others that weren't preferred enclosed cap style devices.

    Girth is not nearly as much of an issue as you might think. I would say keep it roomy since your cut.
     
    Riker's Beard likes this.
  17. Riker's Beard
    Offline

    Riker's Beard Rikers Beard

    Joined:
    Jan 25, 2017
    Messages:
    28
    Likes Received:
    24
    Trophy Points:
    3
    Gender:
    Male
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    US
    Local Time:
    12:01 AM
    #17 Riker's Beard, Jan 27, 2017
    I'm all bare down there, it's been awhile since I buzzed it. I used to have a girlfriend that would not do bj's with a guy if he had pubic hair. (I think she just liked making guys shave their crotch.) Now I'm patiently waiting on my wife to finish her work and come to bed.

    The cage looks good. Bigger than I thought. Packaging is nice. My balls are hiding up in my tummy for some reason (I'm nervous this will all flop.)

    More later.
     
  18. Riker's Beard
    Offline

    Riker's Beard Rikers Beard

    Joined:
    Jan 25, 2017
    Messages:
    28
    Likes Received:
    24
    Trophy Points:
    3
    Gender:
    Male
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    US
    Local Time:
    12:01 AM
    #18 Riker's Beard, Jan 27, 2017
    Well, it's on. The stocking method did work. I managed to nick my balls pretty good and BLOOD EVERYWHERE! Wife clocked out when that happened.

    I can only find one of my balls? I'm using the biggest ring and could not get both in at the same time. Righty keeps climbing up inside of me. But I can't seem to find him so maybe both are in there but hanging on one side?

    I LOVE THE FEEL OF BEING GRIPPED! HOLY MUTTER OF MURGATROID! I can see this getting addicting fast.

    I pee'd with no issue, so I don't think the ring is too small. But maybe?

    Pants I wore today are comfy. I can walk and sit fine. Besides the ball thing I'm comfortable. I feel like I'm getting a hug down there.

    Ok, time for bed. I'll try again in the morning.
     
  19. Riker's Beard
    Offline

    Riker's Beard Rikers Beard

    Joined:
    Jan 25, 2017
    Messages:
    28
    Likes Received:
    24
    Trophy Points:
    3
    Gender:
    Male
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    US
    Local Time:
    12:01 AM
    #19 Riker's Beard, Jan 27, 2017
    [​IMG]

    I've never done a dick pic before... I must REALLY trust you folks. ;-)

    Any advice to getting both balls in the ring? I tried lube. I feel like I could use the size smaller ring if I could just get both through the hole.
     
  20. Riker's Beard
    Offline

    Riker's Beard Rikers Beard

    Joined:
    Jan 25, 2017
    Messages:
    28
    Likes Received:
    24
    Trophy Points:
    3
    Gender:
    Male
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    US
    Local Time:
    12:01 AM
    #20 Riker's Beard, Jan 27, 2017
    [​IMG]

    So close to being there...
     
  21. Jblocked
    Offline

    Jblocked Long term member

    Joined:
    Jul 24, 2015
    Messages:
    690
    Likes Received:
    522
    Trophy Points:
    103
    Gender:
    Male
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    Buffalo NY US
    Local Time:
    3:01 AM
    #21 Jblocked, Jan 27, 2017
    I push ring down and pull on sack I put right one threw first its bigger hold sack not ball and push again.
     
    Riker's Beard likes this.
  22. Riker's Beard
    Offline

    Riker's Beard Rikers Beard

    Joined:
    Jan 25, 2017
    Messages:
    28
    Likes Received:
    24
    Trophy Points:
    3
    Gender:
    Male
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    US
    Local Time:
    12:01 AM
    #22 Riker's Beard, Jan 27, 2017
    That helped! I got both in and then just took a break wearing the ring. After I felt like they relaxed (these things have caused me a LOT of trouble in my lifetime.) I put on the tube. Righty is still riding high but I'm in and it feels OK-ish. I'm watching to make sure nothing turns purple or blue. I assume that I am OK as I have been reading about people going to smaller rings. I can see my next one will have a two part ring. I can't spend an hour doing this everyday like my wife is wanting right now.

    I love tugging on it. I love the weight of it. I can see a metal one in my future. Baby steps for now. My wife is on board because she loves me, but if I push too hard it's over.

    Thank you all for the help and support!
     
    Jblocked likes this.
  23. Nicoftime
    Offline

    Nicoftime The suspense is terrible...I hope it lasts

    Joined:
    May 24, 2016
    Messages:
    5,280
    Likes Received:
    14,209
    Trophy Points:
    143
    Gender:
    Male
    Occupation:
    Railroad
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    South of Lacrosse Wisconsin
    Home Page:
    Local Time:
    2:01 AM
    #23 Nicoftime, Jan 27, 2017
    Not sure about the non metal ones, but find it gets a lot easier with practice.

    I have found it's a lot easier to do after a hot shower. Lots of sack skin to pull on and pull through. The more you have on the other side of ring, the easier it is to get the balls to follow.
    If it's dry or I'm still excited I used some non fragrant lotion. Helps a lot.

    It takes me less than a minute and haven't been wearing mine a whole year yet.

    Good luck
     
    Riker's Beard likes this.
  24. Riker's Beard
    Offline

    Riker's Beard Rikers Beard

    Joined:
    Jan 25, 2017
    Messages:
    28
    Likes Received:
    24
    Trophy Points:
    3
    Gender:
    Male
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    US
    Local Time:
    12:01 AM
    #24 Riker's Beard, Jan 27, 2017
    Thanks, after lots of relaxing and some tugging here and there I have my balls a bit lower and I'm all dressed for work. Taking one of the three keys with me in my wallet. I've been in for almost four hours and I'm feeling pretty natural. (which is scary how right this feels!) I do bump my balls every once and a while. Working will be an interesting experiment. But, I'm not worried. I work in an office and don't do any strenuous tasks. I did help my wife load her work stuff.

    I think she was surprised I got up and got ready when she did. Normally I would stay in bed, wait until she left and then rub out two or three climaxes. Not having that option FELT AWESOME! :)

    I think she's still tentative about it, but she is being supportive and took her key. This morning we cuddled and she felt the whole device and then fondled my balls while we chatted. She says it looks uncomfortable, and is worried I might get hurt or cut off some blood flow. I told her that It feels good, my balls are warm and a healthy color (they are a bit rosey, but not red or worse blue :confused: ) I'm doing my best to not put expectations on her and let her get used to this crazy idea of mine.

    Does anyone lose weight from this? I haven't been my usual snack-always-in-hand mood. I'm sure part of it is the excitement and newness. But also, I'm not slogging through post orgasm blues / crankiness. Thoughts?
     
  25. Riker's Beard
    Offline

    Riker's Beard Rikers Beard

    Joined:
    Jan 25, 2017
    Messages:
    28
    Likes Received:
    24
    Trophy Points:
    3
    Gender:
    Male
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    US
    Local Time:
    12:01 AM
    #25 Riker's Beard, Jan 28, 2017
    So my first day was 14 hours locked up. It was not what I thought it would be. The cage got to body temperature (for some reason I thought it would be cold.) So that was enjoyable. Urination was a hit and miss deal.... LITERALLY. Since I'm not circumcised I already sit to pee 90% off the time, so this was no hard adjustment. But my penis decided to try a different hole each time, so I had some clean up to do a few times.

    Driving my car? Woof. That's going to take some work.

    Sad as I am to say, I'm going to need a larger ring, the 1.75 is just at the point of cutting off circulation.

    More research. Now that I know I enjoy being locked up, I don't mind spending a bit more to help my balls stay healthy.
     
    SoumisCH likes this.
(You must log in or sign up to post here.)
Page 1 of 2
  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
    Accept Learn More...
    Dismiss Notice