The next (final ?) step

In short and for whoever could learn something from our own chastity roadmap, our story.
In other posts we mentioned that we (my wife-keyholder-mistress) started playing with chastity about 10 years ago. We slowly (is the best way if you ask us) over the years evolved from the plastic « play » chastity of the CB range to the steel simple Carrara, than the more elaborate Carrara to the Neosteel (two years ago)

We evolved from a few hours of chastity to 24/7 since about 2 years now. And I’ve never been happier. I must say that my wife loves cuddling, kissing, lots of fondling and attention but she doesn’t have the urge to have sexual intercourse frequently. So having a hubby locked 24/7 for long stretches of time don’t bother her. On the contrary, as all mistresses here know, keep us hubbies from orgasm and you’ll get lots more attention. If I’m out of the belt I usually couldn’t control myself. It started out with watching some porn on Internet, getting aroused and masturbate. Feeling guilty afterwards, but next day or sometimes hours later I went at it again.

Now my wife keeps me in my belt for 1 or 2 months before granting me a full orgasm. We discovered ruined orgasms at about the same time I switched to the Neosteel belt and 24/7 wearing.

My lovely wife now has acquired the art of “milking” me by submitting me to two or three consecutive ruined orgasms every two to three weeks. It is terribly frustrating for me but it does relieve me of some of the built up pressure but keeps me on my toes because the sexual urge and tension remains present. And keeps me tuned to my wife’s more romantic urges.

I could say we obtained 90 % chastity some time ago. The remaining 10 % made me more and more unhappy and angry with myself. This was because, when the arousal and the frustration was really becoming what I would consider unbearable, I would give myself the satisfaction of a ruined orgasm by holding a strong vibrator against the steel tube and by dry-humping the tube. It wasn’t really an orgasm as you cannot have an erection and directly touch the penis in the steel tube. But still, I more and more wanted to avoid this.

I talked about this to my wife and we decided to take the next (final?) step with my complete and total agreement.

We agreed that you could try to achieve total chastity with technical means (the belts) but you need more than that. We think that 100 % chastity can only be reached by a combination of a CB and psychology. The sub who wants to be chaste has to turn the switch between his/her ears…stop thinking about how to escape your chastity but live and enjoy it and help your mistress by indicating where the weak spots remain so she can help you keeping chaste. Don't hunt for orgasms but hunt for the satisfaction of pleasing your mistress by offering her your chastity. She will give you so much in return.

My wife now took complete possession of my penis. A few weeks ago I just handed over symbolically my penis to my wife. This means that in my mind I don’t have a penis any more. It’s my wife’s possession; I just carry it with me. So for me it’s only minimal touching any more, even when I’m not belted (which happens less and less). Usually for cleaning only.
Considering my penis, and of course anything it produces (spunk) as my wife’s exclusive possession helps me to mentally control myself for reaching 100 % chastity. If I feel that I'm on the edge of loosing control I immediately tell my wife and she will help me by keeping me from getting more aroused, if necessary restraining me until I calm down again or granting me a ruined orgasm to release some of the pressure. But that is only as a last resort.

There were a few more changes we made. My wife now has the keys to our trunks with BDSM gear and toys. No more access to vibrators for me. I also made a list of the porn websites I visit and the kinks I long to see to get me aroused. So not to hide anything any more from my wife. No surprise for my wife that I watched SM and rubber sites, but I was very ashamed and was hiding from her that I get very aroused by looking at shemales and sissies being raped, tied, abused and humiliated. Probably because I have this fantasy of being in their situation. So we now talked about that, I can still watch this type of porn, but the computer will be in the living room so she can keep an eye on me. The only “non-mistress” source of arousal that is now allowed to me is porn websites under supervision of my wife to avoid spilling any spunk. The only physical self-stimulation allowed is touching my nipples (after years of chastity and training they are hyper sensitive) and from time to time a big dildo up my anus to stimulate the prostate. But always under supervision.

For me, between my ears, it’s now decided: I go for 100 % chastity and it feels fantastic.

We also agreed that my wife doesn’t tell me any more when I might expect an orgasm, not even a ruined one any more. I just have to wait and be surprised. I know I will still get a full orgasm from time to time but not if it will be in one, two three months or maybe tomorrow…

In the meantime I will of course take excellent care and be very mindful of my wife’s sexual needs. But I will stay belted and only use my fingers, tongue, and dildo’s and vibrators to satisfy her. Hoping that if I’m a real good hubby I might get some release with a ruined orgasm and every now and than a real orgasm.

We love every minute of it…

Next step is buying a Latowski chastity belt that I will wear at home and at night. This belt allows even less access to the penis than the Neosteel but is difficult to wear 24/7 for me (sitting job) The Neosteel will be used during the day. We will also purchase a complete segufix restraining set and a hospital bed. My wife wants to proceed to restraining me with the segufix in the spare bedroom before giving me a ruined orgasm, than diaper me and leave me restrained and diapered for the night to stew.

I feel so lucky to have a partner (married for 30 years this year, 33 years together) who makes me feel so happy. I would to anything for her. BDSM has always been an important part of our life and kept our sexlife from ever becoming tedious.

There’s a few thing that I would like to add to our play but that she cannot do because she doesn’t like that: no anal play, no eating my spunk and no whips. But who cares, I get so much already.

Anyone has any other suggestions to further increase our enjoyment and chastity life, feel free. If anyone has any questions about our chastity play, don’t hesitate also.

Cheers

Bathingcaplovers.