We’ve been exploring our alternative lifestyle for about 10 years now. We started out just like everyone else on here, with the same fears, questions, and reluctance. But just like us, your gonna figure it all out on your own, and find what works best your you. How did we start out ? After many years, my husband finally talked me into a MMF 3some, which quickly led to exploring the HotWife/Cuckold lifestyle. I was still reluctant, but we had some basic rules and a safe word, so we kept exploring, going deeper into these newly found kinks. Still, I found myself holding back. Yes, I found myself a full time Boyfriend/Lover, and put my husband is in Chastity and Panties. We had our little safe word that meant No or Stop, but I guess all three of us didn’t want to hurt or offend one another by going too far. Don’t get me wrong, life was Fucking Great ! A loving Cuckold husband and a Real Man that can take care of every desire I have. Ya, I was holding back a little with my husband, and didn’t want to go too far, but still, i was still having the time of my life. It wasn’t until recently, we started with some playful bondage, and some domination, etc. It wasn’t really my thing, but I went along with it for the guys, and again, I didn’t want to really hurt my husband, either physically or emotionally. Our breakthrough came when we were playing and My Boyfriend wanted me give my husband a few smacks on the ass and slap him across the face. I think all three of us were enjoying the scene, nothing too extreme, just playful fun. Ok, I know it’s not everyone’s kind of scene, It surely wasn’t mine at the time, but hey, things can just happen in the bedroom, right ? That’s when it happened, my husband looked back at me and said “I hit like a girl”, and my Boyfriend told me to stop holding back. After our playtime had finished, my Boyfriend had left, my husband and I were enjoying the afterglow. We were discussing what happened, that’s when we came up with new safe words that worked better for us. They were still simple: Red: Stop Yellow: I’m at the Limit Green: OK We never had to use “Red”, but when “Yellow” was used, I knew to stop and hold back. My Boyfriend later pointed out that that wasn’t the best thing to do. Once again, we redefined the safe words. That’s when everything fell into place and all three of us learned to explore without and limits. Red: still means Stop. : I can’t continue. : I can’t / won’t do that. : etc. Yellow : I’m near the limit. : Near the limit Does Not mean stop but it’s as far a I can go comfortably (right now). : Its OK to explore limits or experiment. Baby,,,As in “yes Baby, no Baby, please don’t Baby, do I have to Baby ?” : Im OK : I’m more that Ok, I Love It ! : keep going, more, more, more ! : Bring it On Bitch ! : etc, it’s our new word for Green/Go. It was a huge breakthrough ! I never found myself holding back again. My point here, is the express how important it is, not only to have and respect rules/limits, but to expand and fully understand your own Safe Words. It might sound like it only applies to exotic fetishes, but it’s so helpful in any kind of alternative lifestyle. We had a lot of fun when we started out, no doubt about that, but we kinda wasted quite a few years holding back. It was either we couldn’t express out loud what we really really wanted for some reason ( a whole different conversation there), or we stopped short and held back, not wanting to go too far and hurt the ones close to you, physically or emotionally. So,,,, get those Safe Words worked out and things will all work out a lot better and a lot sooner. Oh, foot note: “Yellow is a really really fun game”
Thanks for sharing. Sometimes it seems you really don't know what you want, or like, or what your limit might be unless you try it. Assuming you know what your partner wants, or even what you might like without at least approaching it, might mean missing out on a lot of fun, sexy and exciting adventures.