To be chastitized means that I can't touch myself. I haven't yet been in my cage, hindered to enjoy sex. I had fantasies and nightly dreams of being locked up. I grew bigger when I was unable to release myself. My penis size has airways been a soft spot. Guess it got mirrored in my dreams. My GF since 20 years betrayed me, made me a cucked, humiliated man. I was not getting erections, not by chance or even with a girl. I was not up to failing again. I was alone and unhappy. A man gave me back some of my self-esteem. But, not as a man. I was his (woman) sexually. Not by force, no I was there out of my free wish. I'm an easy target, having been cut by my ankles. This man gave me feminine clothes to try and wear when with him. And he chastitized me. I did feel I was different from before. I enjoyed being targeted by mens eyes at nudist beach. I was wearing chastity cage when I was sunbathing. Then one day, he had disappeared. I have been in celibacy for months without being locked. I'm here to be locked up properly by a master.