Hi, my name is Kelli, I’m in my 40’s and my husband Bill and I began our journey to chastity over 5 years ago. When Bill first approached me about his desire to be put into chastity I thought he had completely lost it. Here was the man that fathered two great kids, college educated professional who is highly regarded in our community and wanted me to lock him up? Bill confided his need to be put under lock and key was because of his addiction to masturbation and Internet pornography. Bill related that he would masturbate as much as 3 times a day and was spending as much as $500 a month on online porn. Well I began researching this subject with my younger sister and at first we were both shocked with all the videos, photos and postings, which I would call the dark side of chastity. However we did pursue this subject a little further, purchased a few good books and connected with a few great ladies that better explained the FLR lifestyle. So with a great deal of trepidation on my part 5 years ago Bill and I began this wonderful journey and in all honesty, I would never go back. A year after Bill and I started or journey my sister confided in me that she wanted to figure out a way to get her husband locked up. If I’m accepted into your community I may disclose how we both came up with a plan that not only worked for my sister, but also a with a few other girlfriends of mine (which BTW was very embarrassing to Bill). But first I want to make sure that I am welcomed here and disclose a little more information about myself and Bill. First off Bill and I are involved in a monogamous relationship, meaning that we are committed to each other and no one else. Second because of Bill’s prior history of porn addition I do NOT allow him to view any pornography what so ever. This rule also applies to forums such as this and I’ve gone so far as to install spyware on his computer that will alert me if he does. Third I’ve been planning on writing a book about male chastity for some time but I recently changed direction and decided to write a book and develop a website geared more toward reviews of male chastity devices and the FLR lifestyle. And lastly but most importantly so you know where my head is I consider Bill and I normal (vanilla) in every way. We are BOTH professionals in our field, we have 2 wonderful kids away in college, we have a great marriage, but we do share one SMALL kink. I completely control what he can and cannot do with his penis, even how he uses it to go to the bathroom. I hope that you are willing to accept my guidelines and accept me into your community so we can help other like-minded couples together in their journey. With Love, Kelli O.
Thank you Mascara - Trying to learn how to navigate this site and update my profile right now. First time I've subscribed to a forum like this. Also complement the admins for putting a site like this together, lots of great info and hope to met new like minded people.
It is wonderful to have you join us. Welcome! I too, savor the joys of male chastity. My husband and I are very much in love and play within this relationship. We do have a serious side and practice FLR and would not have it any other way. Pleased to welcome you and your husband if you permit. I'm sure we have many things to share. Most months we decide on some type of game or theme for our play. I do practice domestic discipline and we live D/s. We recognize every relationship is different and that is what makes Chastity Mansion a fun, yet excepting, and non-judgmental place to frequent. Warm greetings
Wow, thanks everyone for such a warm welcome and allowing me into your community, I am honored. First off I hope I didn’t offend anyone by my remark about the dark side of male chastity. My point of view whatever 2 or more consenting adults do in the privacy of their home is their business. What I find offensive is the way a lot of this stuff is marketed and the knock off crap being peddled to the uneducated on sites like Amazon and eBay. Bill’s first device was purchased on Amazon and it almost caused a serious injury. We called the company we thought made it and was told that this was a cheap knock off made in China. Your forum is very educational however someone like Bill or I that have very little free time so we don’t have the resources to sift through everything. So the idea of writing an eBook and a website popped into my head a few months ago. I’m 80% done with the book and one of my close business associates is a professional web developer has volunteered to lend a hand. I am also contemplating doing some videos as he does have a studio we can use, however I am very fearful of someone recognizing me thus putting Bill’s job and his reputation on the line. Anyway I cannot find the words to thank you for your open arms. Prior to the release of my book I would love to have some of you guys/gals review it for your commentary. Kelli O.
Thank you MistressL but because of Bill's prior history with Internet Porn I do not allow him any access to sites that I would rate above PG. When we began our journey back in 2007 I only agreed to it because I was shocked that he was spending as much as $500 a month on membership sites. So our initial agreement was I would hold his key as long as he promised to never again look at any pornography. Of course I don't trust him so I have this site along with several others blocked in our router at home. I've also installed spyware on his computer that will alert me if he types anything sexual. I also forbid him from erasing his history on his computer and mobile device and I check them both frequently. I know that this may sound extreme to some of you but this is my #1 requirement in our relationship. A side benefit of course I'm afforded the privacy to chat with everyone here in the open to learn new techniques without him knowing about it <grin>
That's the way to do it. Make him know you've got him by the (O-O)s so tight and there's nothing he can do about it- he's got too much to lose...hehehe....I reckon you can probably teach some of us a thing or too!
Joroincharge I'm sure we can teach each other <grin> It's been a very stressful week for both Bill and I. Because of the holidays Bill has been called into covering a few extra shifts. Because tax session is just around the corner some of my clients want to get their finances in line before the 31st. Hopefully I can find some time to discuss some thoughts I've had about my future discipline plans when my husband acts out. I'm not into corporal punishment at all as it brings back bad memories of my childhood.
I know how it is. Work's hectic for me too. But yes. Plenty of ideas here already. Good you're keeping Bill out at present so he can't know what you're up to. Have you thought of passwording his 'history' files so he can't delete them anyway? Plenty of discipline methods without CP though...LOL Look forward also to hearing how you helped sister & GFs to be KHs of their men! Looks like you've nice little network there...
Every few minutes a snapshot of his screen is saved and also emailed to me. Then every few days I take a quick glance, read what and to who he is emailing, what sites he has visited and so on. Then every few days I also go through his browsing history on his iPhone. The only computers I cannot check are the ones at his office, however his department has a very strict Internet policy on that and they do review that.
I like it. I'd not worry about his work. Most employers have strict policies and controls on employees accessing 'inappropriate' websites. MIne certainly does. And breach is a very serious disciplnary matter and can lead to summary dismissal. And look at it this way: at least he had the guts to tell you he had this habit, and needed you to take him in hand to stop him at it, knowing he hadn't the self-control to do it else. There are many othermales who visit porn sites regularly, and conceal it; and sometimes get found out by their partners: which can be even more traumatic than in your case. Fundamentally and deep down he knows he needs to be ruled with a rod of iron. And controlled 24/7/365 every which way. And you know this too, so you've decided to do it. For a male I reckon 99% of power = balls. Once you've got him down there, you don't let go, he knows it, and you're home and dry.
I believe FLM is the only way to go. I've hinted to my wife of 43 years that we should give it a try as she likes to control many things already. I managed to get her to discipline me for a short time and she just gave up. I want to be chaste, disciplined and have all areas of my life controlled. I agree, whatever a couple does in their home is their business. What am I doing wrong? Any hints or help of any kind will be greatly appreciated. :sad:
I agree. But for it to work the wife/KH has got to WANT it. Which also means she can get some advantage out of it which she could not get else. Kelli's got the answer, so have many others here; but some people are just not like that naturally at all.
First let me get this straight, I don't control 100% of my husband and I would never want this type of relationship. The things I control in our marriage is: sex and our finances. We split the household chores, and other family issues. We are each professionals in our respective careers so I don't interfere with his job, he doesn't interfere with my job. I do not use any form of corporal punishment in any form as I feel using "mind control" is much more effective. If Bill EVEN SUGGESTED that I use some sort of physical punishment at the start of our journey I would have never agreed with ANY of this! If I could define our relationship I would by saying that I'm the Queen and my husband is my knight. I know as my knight that he would do anything for me, even lay down his life to protect me. So in turn I began fulfilling his sexual need of chastity to improve our relationship. So perhaps you will be more successful by figuring out what your wife wants and put her needs above yours. Then perhaps she will reciprocate by fulfilling your sexual needs Remember FLR is about HER and not YOU!