Hello, I am new to chastity. I purchased a CB 6000s. We only use it for short term fun at the moment. My wife is concerned about it hurting me and what would happen if a medical emergency came up and I didn't have time or was physically unable to remove it because of said emergency. I am hoping to move to long term lock up, but as you might guess from my previous statement, my wife is somewhat vanilla. I have tried for eleven years to get her to take the lead in our relationship and really hope one day that she will force me to watch as she cuckolds me and then force me to clean her up. Anyway, that is another story for another time (hopefully not another 11 years). What I wanted to ask now was how to solve a problem I have with my device. I am unable to get my device to stay on after it is locked. I use the smallest possible ring that I can, but it seems I don't have enough room behind my ball sac for the ring to sit and stay. After a few hours, the ring ends up sliding over the balls and falling off with the cage still locked and attached to the ring. I have used cock rings in the past and have had the same problem with them. Does anyone else have, or have had, this problem that they can offer suggestions for possible solutions? Perhaps I need a different device, but with my past experience with the cock rings, I am not sure if that's really the problem. I think it is more my physical anatomy. Long term chastity is out of the question unless I find a way to keep the ring in place. Thanks.
Welcome. Yours is a story that most of us have. I am approaching out 12th month of chastity and faced all the same issues that you have. Each time we stop for a break, discuss what worked and did not work for each of us, and then restarted again, it got better. My wife had the same worries as yours does. She thought my balls would explode if I did not cum for a few weeks and that wearing my CB6000s would hurt my penis. She not longer thinks that and is trying to take a more dominant role. We do not want to get into a Mistress/slave relationship as neither of us wants that but we do want to be able to slip into D/s roles as wanted for sexual play. What worked the best for me was massaging my wife's feet for hours. She would be happy if I did that all day and night. After a while she began to associate longer periods of denial with better foot massages. Now she knows that it is best for her the longer I go without an orgasm and while feeling humiliated wearing panties which she bought for me. You need to constantly reassure your wife that when she does the things that she thinks will displease you, she is actually pleasing you. My wife does not want to be a bitch so I have talked to her and explained that when she was an office manager and told her staff what to do, did she consider herself a bitch? I told her that a bitch does not respect her husband while a dominant loving wife does. Baby steps, short term goals and gentle guidance along with frequent discussions to review how it is going and what needs to be changed, will work over the long run. Do not expect your wife to grow leather skin and start a whip collection. It is very difficult for someone to change from what they are to something else and what you may want her to become, may not be something she wants. Somewhere in there is a middle ground that will work for both of you. Go out and discover it.
@das_risiko Regarding your device problem, your cuff ring is obviously too large. I have no idea of your physical proportions as you have not submitted any photos. Perhaps a ball stretcher would help.
I thought that the ring was to large as well, but I am unable to get the next size smaller ring on. I had thought about a ball stretcher and will look into that. Thank you.
Thanks for the Welcome Max51. My wife comes from a close knit Italian Catholic family and had very little experience prior to getting married. I think her background has as much to do with it as her concerns. I on the other hand had worked in an Adult toy store years ago and because of that tend to be a little less vanilla. She has come a ways, but there is still some discussion to be had. I am not sure if I will ever get her to cuckold me because of her background, but she has noticed how much more excited I get when we role play her having a boyfriend. So that seems to be a step in the right direction.
I might also add that part of my reasoning for wanting my wife to cuckold me is for her to continue to have the pleasure she deserves. I had a double knee replacement last year and as a result can never again kneel down on my knees. This means I can't be on top anymore, which is my wife's favorite position. She deserves to continue experiencing the pleasure that every women should have, even though I am unable to fulfill that. My biggest challenge I think is getting her to see that I want this for her pleasure and that it is not an invitation for us both to take other partners. I think that might be part of her fears as well.