Finnding a Domme

Discussion in 'Seeking or soliciting' started by dearelliot, Dec 8, 2018 at 3:26 PM.

  1. dearelliot
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    dearelliot New member

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    Because I have had so much difficulty finding a Domme over the years, I have instead found several professional ladies who I helped convert into becoming a Domme for me. so much so that more than a couple have continued their work as a Domme.
    My advice, start slow, no whips at first, nothing too extreme until they learn how very easy and rewarding it can be for them.
    I'm a stupid old man if I can do this anyone can.
     
  2. tomf_22033
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    tomf_22033 Active member

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    You don’t sound stupid.

    I’ve “converted” several vanillas.

    You’re right on point. I’d add don’t be creepy. Make it fun and remember newbies are experiencing everything for the first time so us old timers have to remember what that was like.

    We also need to remember that our kinks grew over time. What was far out when we were new is mild now. So to a vanilla we need to use the drug pusher approach. Give them a little sample, and make them want more. Make them ask for it, and want to think it’s their idea. Once they’re hooked then they won’t want to be vanilla anymore and will take charge.

    I’d also add always make it about respect. And just help them explore and try things as they’re ready.
     
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  3. Mistress Jules
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    Mistress Jules Professional Dominatrix and Owner of Lockit
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    I remember well when I first started on this site. Not entirely vanilla but not far from it. Discussing with some members how I was not into impact play and could never see myself enjoying hitting someone.

    As you can tell from my profile pic, that changed rather rapidly and I ended up the impact specialist at the dungeon in Glasgow for a while. Although out of practice now, there is still a little thrill goes through me when I take out my implements. From my very first gentle suede flogger to my much more intense whips which are my favourite nowadays.

    Thanks to @lockit I had the absolute most fun learning about these things and how to use them safely.

    It's amazing how things can progress very quickly when you are introduced to something new.
     
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  4. dearelliot
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    dearelliot New member

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    I have been seeing My present Mistress near 9 yrs now. she was not a Domme when we met, Honestly, no she is not as good a Domme as the professionals I have known, no. But she is local available enthusiastic and willing to learn ...she has sought out other D/s customers but to be honest, finding men who will pay as opposed to those who talk about paying is quite a chore, at least she tells me that. She feels many men who want to be dominated want a woman to do it for free, Well yeah me too, now back to reality. If you go years and years without finding a "For free Domme" maybe just maybe you might want to think about a professional, you only live once guys, there is no coming back you know.
     
  5. henry58
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    henry58 Member

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    Sorry @dearelliot, feels a little more on the fantasy side. Your PM was interesting though.
     
  6. dearelliot
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    dearelliot New member

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    Strange you say that, I'm not sure why My from Columbia, Mistress Liliana is surely no fantasy. she has 2 children one recently discharged from the Navy and the other a as adult daughter back in College as her liberal arts degree hasn't been helpful. That LilianaI and I discuss her wish for clients, Well I did have a friend but he prefers guys although he was here with us once.

    No fantasy everything I said was true.
     
  7. dearelliot
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    dearelliot New member

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    We have been together 9yrs we me through her ad in AFF. I've been married for 60yrs,
     
  8. henry58
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    henry58 Member

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    Your details regarding early conversion techniques basically suck.
     
  9. dearelliot
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    dearelliot New member

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    Well henry Id ,love to here your conversion theorys...Mine are true, I used to meet ladies on AFF, married usyually and offer them money since I don't stack up as a likely suitor ..so my thoughts I was surprised at how many actually wanted to do this for money why I don't know maybe they always felt they qwould have been good at it. Anyway sorry we disagree, enjoy Henry
     
  10. henry58
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    henry58 Member

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    @dearelliot doing domme stuff for dosh does not IMHO make one a Domme. A ProDomme in my mind is a skilful practitioner of Female Domination, as opposed to prostitutes/escorts who do a bit of domme on the side. I would make the distinction between general surgery and neurosurgery.
     
  11. dearelliot
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    dearelliot New member

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    I think you are almost correct. First to be honest, I am 84 so I have been going to professionals since I was 19 and stationed in Berlin, now I probably didn't see many Dominant lady's until around the age of 40 when I really found my niche. Next your idea on what a Domme does might not be the same as mine and the next guy. I've known Dommes who ask the men to clean there home do their lawns etc and get little sex, well I suppose in some people mind if that's their idea of a Domme well who can argue, it is simply not mine.

    I have served skilled professional Dommes, My first was an Icelandic Woman in South Jersey and her dungeon was quite complete, along with a manakin with Full Nazi Officers uniform which for some clients she would wear. and on an don't want to bore you but if you will talk further with me fine.
     
  12. henry58
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    henry58 Member

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    I'm still talking
     
  13. dearelliot
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    dearelliot New member

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    Well No Question I have never met any dominant woman equal to Mistress (Odd choice of names but it was hers), Mistress Heide So that's easy yeah no body is as good as she was. But I met her in 1978, and it was great while it lasted, really perfect, and she was a true Pro. Now I cant say that since her there are no other Pro Dommes because they don't meet the standard she set!
    Ive met others who were all strictly pro domes and damned mediocre at it, while some 'Ive converted one or two who took to it like a fish to water.

    BTW I have to Magazines from that time period where Heide posed for layouts, If your interested and if you were interested and maybe you are not, why would you be, but If..Id try to send pics of them
     
  14. dearelliot
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    dearelliot New member

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    Anyway my wife is here and supper etc, so Im out here for now
     
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