Hello everyone, for those who haven't read my introduction, just a quick summary: I'm in my mid-20s and for the first time I have the opportunity to explore chastity and feminization after my girlfriend and I broke up. The forum caption says "The Vault - We are all on a journey. Please share yours here with an interactive journal." Yes, I'm on a journey. But I don't really know where I will end up. Most of us probably know that fantasy and reality are sometimes totally different. I've always fantasized about living as a women. I've always fantasized about being locked up in chastity. But the truth is: I don't know if I still like those things in reality. And so my journey begins... (Warp 9, Engage!) Chastity I'm still locked up in my CB-6000 via CarliLock. (Please vote for me - I still need a non-member to vote). I'm locked up since last Sunday and set the minimum lock-up-time to a week. So I'm locked up until sunday anyway. But after that I depend on the mercy of others, strangers. That's frightening and arousing at the same time. The longest I've been in chastity was about 2 weeks. That was tough. I'm not sure if I can last any longer. I hope I don't have to try this out Anyway, I already ponder how I should achive my first orgasm after I'll be released. Simply masturbating got really boring lately (one of the reasons I've locked myself up). Any suggestions? Feminization I've been dressing up since I was about 11 or 12. Lucky for me I never got caught by anyone. I still remember what triggered my interest in feminine clothing. I think it was in 5th grade. There was a picture (and a whole chapter for that matter) about school uniforms in our english text books. We didn't have to wear uniforms to school here in germany, so this topic was already interesting. But that picture really stuck with me. There was a group of schoolchildren including one very good looking girl who wore a white blouse, a sleeveless pullover, a navy blue skirt and white knee socks. I've never had "contact" with some kind of formal dress before (except for the occasional wedding my family attended), so this was really appealing to me. The girls in my school sadly just wore t-shirts and jeans all the time. (to be fair, we boys never went to school wearing a suit either ... well, actually we did once. And it was legendary. But that's not of interest here ) Anyway, from that moment on I was attracted to formal, "proper" clothing and uniforms - both for men and women. Until now, I mainly lived out my fetish by wearing suits every now and then (unfortunately, everyone is rather casually dressed where I work, but I try to suit up as often as possible), but now I'll start wearing feminine clothes for a change (at home, not to work ). Don't get me wrong, I actually like male-me. I like my beard. I like doing guy-stuff like watching motorsports. I'm a sci-fi-geek. But starting today, female-me will slowly take over (at least every now and then). But I don't want to just dress up. I want to do (stereotypical?) feminine stuff. I want to learn cooking (well, actually I really need to learn cooking ). I want to learn sewing. I want to think, feel and act like a women. I really want to experience what it's like to be a woman. And sooner or later I'll see if reality is really as good as my fantasy. By the way, here are the results of today's shaving and dressing: I missed a few tiny hairs, but I'm satisfied with this first attempt. And I really like the second picture. I can't believe that's me. Let's see how this works out. Hopefully, male-me and female-me will have the opportunity to co-exist peacefully (should I ever find a new girlfriend, I hope she's fine with that). Or at least I hope to find out whether I like male-me or female-me more. I'll inform you about the progress, if anyone cares to read So ... I'm horny after writing this. And silly me is wearing a chastity device. Damn! Cornelia P.S.: Female-me hasn't taken over my complete body yet. I still have my beard ... I need it for a historical pageant next month. But after that it'll be gone. I promise!