Key Holder Awakening

I will get through it.
I’ve managed more loads of washing over the past 2 days than I have done in my life. That is also not an exaggeration.

 

Well, my KH returned on Thursday, and it’s evident that she is loving her new role!
Oh, I forgot to mention I woke up to a picture from her wearing a Muir Cap dangling the key! Wow, she looked so sexy! Anyway, when she got back the kids were out so she allowed me to go down on her pretty much as soon as she got back, and she rode me until she had an orgasm. Well in truth I’d arranged to go and visit my parents. While I was there I received a text telling me she was horny. I stayed for about 30 mins and then made excuses! To my delight and this may not appeal to some of you. But, she put on a pvc mac for me! Yum.

We then went out for a family meal with the kids. Later that night she agreed to edge me in her opera leather gloves and she decided I could have a ruined orgasm. Which she executed with perfection. I know it was perfect because I just didn’t feel totally satisfied. It was pleasurable but, just, well, not enough as I remained erect.
Disclaimer, this is my journal and therefore truthful. I have a lot of fetishes and some of you won't be interested and maybe disgusted by them.
When we went to bed that night I asked Mistress to smoke for me, she happily agreed as she normally goes outside. As she smoked she told me how pathetic I am. How it made her laugh that I run around so much in the hope of being given some attention.
I'm loving life at the minute!

 

I'm glad to say things are still going well with the teasing and denial.
I won't go into details but Sunday I was highly rewarded.

Rewinding a bit to Saturday night. My KH came up with an interesting idea. To help me get fitter she is going to add 2 exercise sessions to the Obedience app along with as she calls it “kinky bootcamp” which starts on Saturday. Interesting times.

 

It’s been a week since my last update and unfortunately things have gone a little south. I’m writing this update from my phone so apologies if the grammar is a little off.

I will start with the positives. It’s now been agreed that Mistress sends me a high heel emoji when she requires oral. This is something that happened twice last week.
Fetish bootcamp has been postponed due to last weekends weather. I am at a sporting event this Saturday so it’s pencilled I’m got the week after. Sunday I was unlocked for PIV which was excellent. Mistress wore a leather effect jumpsuit. As this item
of clothing is easy to get on I didnt need to pay for the treat from my Obidience points.

Now onto the problems. Prior to sex on Sunday we had a few drinks in the pub which was my KHs idea. On the evening I admit that I continued to drink and ended up having too much which caused a anxiety hangover on Monday. Due to this I failed on my Obedience task of getting out of bed at a certain time and making Mistress coffee. She was far from impressed and I got silent treatment most of the Monday. But it had already been arranged that I could use some reward points for chastity pegging.
Without going into all the finer details, that day no matter what I did wasnt good enough. I said that maybe my reward wasn’t a good idea. This also angered Mistress so I prepared for it. When the time came she stood in the bedroom naked with her hands on her hips wearing the strapon. I have no idea why but I find this site very appealing. It’s a good leather harness from Aslan leather.
I was super nervous as it’s been ages and was shaking a bit. This also annoyed her and she was shouting at me to relax. Long story short my pegging session didn’t go ahead. I don’t know if I need to try again when I’m not stressed and Mistress isn’t angry. Also, maybe I need to use a small dildo as the one we have is fairly big and I’m out of practice.
I will update this later today when I’m done with work.

 

My KH think that’s I’m too hung up on getting rewards in the app and not trying to please her enough. She also thinks I’ve been in a weird mood, which she is also blaming on alcohol.
The truth is, since my orgasm in Sunday I haven’t been feeling very submissive. Well I feel today like I’m getting back into that place.
I have suggested no orgasm on Sunday but she ignored the suggestion. We will see where this goes.
On the device wearing front. It’s becoming very comfortable to wear so that’s good.

 

I’m starting to have doubts. Maybe I am expecting too much. I don’t know. I’ve really tried today. Doing numerous chores and not back chatting and trying to be a listener and always engaged. Maybe Mistress is just not in a good place this week.
I think patience is the key here. I need to keep my mouth shut about sexual matters and focus on making her happy.

 

Mistress appears in a much happier mood. We have the house to ourselves for a few hours early evening tomorrow.
I am considering asking if we can give the chastity pegging another go. I will see how things progress today. But I do think it may be a good idea.


Another thing I've been thinking about is asking for my chastity device being removed on Saturday. I'm going to be out all day from the early hours until late evening. This will be spending a lot of time on a coach. So I think remaining locked is pretty much out of the question and I 100% know I won't be tempted to do any touching.

 

I read other peoples blogs and they go swimmingly! Not mine though. What a mess! I talk about thinking Mistress is in a good place. Then, tonight happens. I’ve been given totally mixed messages. I’ve never, ever heard her so dominant. I need to gather my thoughts and will try to articulate the events tomorrow.

Just to add. This is my real blog. If I’m boring people and wasting space please let me know.

 

I’m confused too! I’m not getting much sense from her and we are going to discuss it properly on Sunday.
Last night she was saying that I’m topping from the bottom and various other things that weren’t true. But I didn’t defend myself. I let her go to bed and calm down.
Today she is saying she doesn’t want to dictate and everything be her way. Anyway, as I say we are going to discuss further on Sunday. I really need to think how I clearly advise her what I want.