Hello everyone, my name is Jason and I don't know what I'm doing. That sounded more like an AA intro, but I'm going to roll with it. I got my first chastity cage a few months ago and didn't like it's fit, so I got a holy trainer a few weeks back that seems to fit nicely. I haven't yet gone more than 24 hours in it, but I'm wearing it now at work while I type this, so we'll see how long I can last this time. I guess I'm here because I'm trying to accept this part of me instead of trying to push through with pretending that it doesn't exist. That's the short story. Man it feels weird to even type this, but hey; in for a penny, in for a pound. I'm living in the Midwest with my beautiful wife and two small children. I've 'felt' kinky for a long time and until recently have done a good job of suppressing it. I think I'm into bondage, but because my wife is much closer to asexual than kinky I've opted to go for chastity as a way to channel these feelings that I can't seem to shake. Guess I'll go wander around the site hoping the community aspect will help me feel less isolated.
Welcome to cm. I hope your wife eventually comes around. It’s no fun when you have to hide your feelings and not be able to be yourself and what feels right to you. Chastity is great and I love it and if you like bdsm also which is great too.! I hope you get it all and hope she eventually can get into it. It is important for everyone to be free and do what’s in them while we have the time
Welcome to the Mansion. Your wife may have felt somewhat "asexual" to you recently, but I bet you wouldn't have said that about her when you married her. You and she have both developed and changed since then and perhaps many new things have developed on both sides. I can relate to all you say about a cage that didn't fit and the relief of finding one that does. And then the totally weird sensation of wearing it under clothes in public for the first time. (Just went through that myself this year.) Coming back to the problem of you being kinky and her not: it will take a fair bit of courage for you to begin talking to her about this. It will take all your caring, diplomatic and empathetic skills to keep the conversation going. Chasitity is probably just a feature on the vast territory of your kink-potential. But for her, it may be the weirdest thing she's ever heard of. In any case, communication between the two of you will be the only way for you to feel more comfortable. And for her to feel more comfortable with you. Hopefully you can both find a way to express your current desires to each other. You might begin with this article. "Go slow" might be the most important suggestion it makes. When I think of the difficulties I had in broaching this subject to my wife, I still wonder how it all turned out much better than I had any right to expect. Kink will seem to your partner like the great unknown. Your first job will be to help her not be afraid of it. https://blogs.psychcentral.com/sex-talk/2018/07/you-are-kinky-but-your-partner-is-not/
Hello and welcome to the Mansion, I would echo what others have written about going slow, your wife may not be interested but if your planning on doing chastity she should know about it and why. Take the time to communicate why you want to go in to chastity and what the benefits would be for you both, don't ask her to be your keyholder but suggest if she wanted to hold the keys she is welcome to, she may not be asexual so much as just bored with the her sexlife.