Maybe everybody else here knew this all along, but I just realized something today: Male chastity which includes a lockable device is really a massive symbol of commitment, in much the way a wedding ring is! The male is saying to his partner/KH, "I love you very much and commit to not having sex without you, and here is my key to guarantee it." You could imagine it as part of a wedding ceremony. Why would you not make this gesture, if you are truly serious about the vows you take as part of that ceremony? Besides just the fun of it, (in multiple ways-my beautiful wife/KH play out various sexual fantasies/games involving some facet of chastity) entering male chastity with a loving partner is a terrific way of showing your devotion. Maybe if this part of it were emphasized, more people (women, in particular) would be comfortable with it. As I said, maybe I'm just ignorant, and didn't get this before-and it's old news to everybody else here. But, wow, it just struck me today how powerful this gesture can really be. It's as if the light bulb in my head went on! My 2 cents for today.......
What can disguise or skew this perspective when you start this journey is the intent in which you started. Your thought above is definitely my "why".
Good for you @Dr MBogo you have realized what chastity ca be. Yes it's a commitment to marriage it's just a mater of where you ring is on her finger or on her cock (You) it's a commitment that if the foundation is built on Love Honour and Respect Your chastity will be a perfect marriage.
I hadn't verbalized it, but you are correct MBogo. I don't wear a ring on my hand, but I sure do love wearing one down a little lower on my body.
A little bit off topic but many years ago I was off for a lads weekend. Mrs Chaste said (with a smile) "make sure you behave yourself". I replied " that's OK I've got my wedding ring on that's my protection against loose women ". Her friend said " ah yes but to some women its just a challenge !" At least with a chastity cage they'd have to be able to pick your lock!
Genial!!!! And yes, maybe everyone on here already knew that but I certainly hadn’t thought of it in quite that way! I must confess, I have stolen that line (thank you!) and said much the same thing to my wife this evening after she asked me to give her a back massage later... Driving home I had been working out my speech to her as to why exactly I needed to be caged... and when I got home, I got her in the kitchen and relayed (well... some of it!) enough of my speech to get her even more receptive to my reasons to be caged.... and then I used precisely what you shared here... and she really opened her eyes and said “Hmmmm... that’s very interesting, I’d not thought of that!!” So I told her given that the penis is directly connected to the male brain, this chastity lark really will be a double and even treble winner for YOU!!! (I won’t mention the contents of my speech here) but she was more than a little interested - At that moment she said, “so you CAN give me a massage without getting horny then?” To which I could only reply, “of course not... but that’s MY problem isn’t it... you simply need to tell me that YOU don’t WANT me to come tonight and I will naturally have to comply.. that’s how all this works!!” - I am not caged yet but the days are counting down 8 to go before my cage will be on! She is getting the idea!! Gulp!
Well, where to begin 1. Chastity play is not just about not having sex without the wife, in most cases it also involves her controlling and denying your pleasure, which goes beyond any vow of an equal relationship, and puts it on D/s grounds where one partner has power over the other. 2. Even if we were to strip any D/s element of chastity, do away with orgasm denial, and have the wife merely keep track of the key, even then chastity would still go beyond any vow of an equal relationship since you are also preventing self-pleasure. Women masturbate, men masturbate, it is natural and healthy, and is crucial to releasing sexual tension when one partner is indisposed or not in the mood. So unless the woman is also expected to never masturbate and have all her pleasure come from the husband, then chastity will invariably push things into D/s and away from an equal relationship. 3. Even without the sexual element, chastity play still is light years away from merely refraining from having sex or pleasure. The cage doesn’t just prevent sexual relations, it prevents erections, and it’s an objective hindrance to hygiene, grooming, and overall comfort. And even if you adjust to the hygiene and comfort issue, we still have the forceful prevention of an erection, which spikes the level of discomfort to a whole new level (during sleep but also during the day). To me going without orgasms or even stimulation is easy, I can go for months without batting an eye. But without erections? That is a completely different game. It is not reasonable to push someone to endure this discomfort outside the context of a BDSM roleplay. This is precisely why a huge number of people play orgasm control and chastity on the honor system. So here again, it’s all about BDSM and leagues away from the vow of an equal relationship. 4. Even ignoring all this, and assuming this is simply about not being unfaithful, then using a physical restraint defeats the entire purpose. I want to trust my wife and know she will not cheat whether she is able to do it or not. If she is physically restrained and unable to cheat anyway, that defeats the whole purpose of trust. So if I gave the key to my wife and said it was to prove my commitment, she would certainly question why I don’t have the willpower to do it without being restrained.
Setting aside all the sexuality that's going on, it also adds a certain something to all those little phrases of social lubrication and manners that have become so insincerely used. "Certainly Madam" "The pleasure is all mine" even the completely worn out "Have a nice day!" takes on a new element of truthfulness.
Ps.... given that my brain is completely fuddled at the moment... my lock up will be the Wednesday following Easter... April 4th! That said, I have not had any release for a week now and wifey is being firm. It’s time of the month and she says if she can’t, then I can’t. Simple! I am not allowed to wash him ‘too fast or too hard’ in the shower. I have to wait. I was hoping for some leniency in the run up to lock up... now I am just hoping that she WILL let me come before the event. I am already up to 10 extra days caged on top of whatever release date she gives me. She is really getting into this worryingly well!! :-0
very intresting opinions and thoughts here, i feel in is a huge show of comitment to, but to me and Madam its not so much about trust as it is control as well, to Madam it is about her having compleate control over me, both body and mind. unlike a lot of members here (from what i have seen, my apologys if im wrong as i mean no offence to anyone) chastity was not my idea, madam found out about and was insistant that i was going into chastity, and once i had started madam made we re write our contract to include chastity. just my thoughts on this.