I’ve been locked up for almost 3 weeks, unfortunately my wife is not well at the moment, so her interest in sex and unlocking me is non existent right now, and could be this way for another several weeks. I’m pushing out to the longest I’ve been locked, but didn’t want to achieve this in this environment when my wife is unwell. Should I ask her to unlock me and we can restart chasity when she’s better? Or should I just let it ride and stay locked until she’s better? I don’t want to bother her with having to think about sex games (chastity) while she’s not well, so I’m tempted just to say nothing. Interested in thoughts from the Mansion.
My thoughts, and I don't know all your circumstances, are that you shouldn't even be thinking of yourself at this time. You should be devoted to your wife, your key holder, and only be thinking if her getting through this. It would be selfish to even mention this to her, leave the device....do not touch it and I think when your wife is better and she thinks of your Chastity she will be pleased that you left it on......for her....for she has the power.
If it's been 3 weeks and your not being teased, you shouldn't have a problem, I say ride it out for as long as it takes. All your concentration should be on your wife. Hope she is feeling better soon.
There is no reason to restart. Just keep the cage on. Concentrate on your wife and her needs. She should ALWAYS be your focus. If you continue to be locked, every day you will break a record, so just continue to wear that cage.
Well for us it wouldn’t be quite so melodramatic, but I would still leave it on. Not because it would be selfish, but because I’ve already told her it will stay on unless she wants it off. If she wanted it off while she wasn’t feeling well, she would tell me to take it off. 99% of the time we aren’t engaged in any games or teasing anyway. It happens, but not so often that the loss of it would be a shock. It is fun but most of the time our normal life is what dictates our activities. So I would leave it on unless she asks about it. When things start to pick up, you won’t have to wait around to get back into the groove again.
Agreed, ride it out - focus your energy on your wife which should also help take your mind off of not having any release. We were in a similar state shortly after we started with chastity; my Wife had to have two discs fused in Her neck which obviously required some time to recover, my condition was the LAST thing on either of our minds... Even though I remained caged during this time it was no big deal as my focus was on my Wife and being unlocked would have zero advantage as the last thing I would want to do would be to have rubbed one out while She was recovering. Good luck and hope all is well.
We setup our chastity game to be mutually enjoyable. We still carry on with regular life out side of the bedroom and whenever life happens and we can't play we talk about it and decide what we want to do. If we aren't doing a challenge or trying to break a record or something it's no big deal for us to stop and take a break. It's actually preferred because if I'm unable to enjoy having him locked or if he's not enjoying it for any reason why keep playing? I feel like I'm going against the grain here but I'd suggest talking to her and finding our what her thoughts on it are. Is she enjoying keeping you locked while she's unable to play and wants some misery loves company while she's sick? Maybe shes planning on some kind of epic surprise once she feels better and doesn't want to start over? Or just maybe she's sick and isn't in the mood to play and is only keeping you locked because she thinks you are having the time of your life locked in there? I'd say find out. Let her know it's a two player game and if she doesn't feel like playing right now you don't either. One thing we do sometimes if we get busy and can't play for a while is unlock him and go on the honor system. He still doesn't get to orgasm but he's out of his cage and isn't having to deal with the emotional roller-coaster that happens when he's basically ignored. That's usually what we do if there is a few days to a week where we know we can't be intimate any. If we were looking at weeks of no intimacy we'd just stop playing and he would be a free range man for a while until we got ready again. So my advice is to talk to her and find out how she feels about it. Maybe she will let you out, maybe she will say something that makes waiting however long on her to get back in the mood enjoyable for you again. Maybe a little break from the cage will be just enough to keep you happy and continue your denial. Hope that helps and I hope she gets to feeling better.
Your locked so just bide your time focus on your wife and hopefully wour wife will get better. When she does she might well appreciate that you have been denied for a while and without complaint. Whilst I would wish illness on very few people in this world something good might come of your wife's recent incapacity, a better appreciation of each of each other and of course of good health are two things that come immediately to mind. Perhaps too your wife might develop appreciation that you are serious about being locked and denied by her and for her ... not for you.
Like the majority of people have said. Stay locked, it's not like your wife is wanting any kind of sexual activity so their is no reason for you to have any either. The most important thing for you to do is support your wife and care for her needs. It doesn't matter how long you stay locked, even months won't hurt you. Staying Locked and committed to your wife during her time of need will only bring the two of you closer together. Submitting to her sometimes takes on a different perspective like Now. Stay Locked
it depends on why you locked up in the first place. It also depends on what you want to do when unlocked What most people before me said, look after your wife, don't watch porn. I am sure she won't mind you hugging her and showing affection. You will for sure be able to do more of that when you don't masturbate. Fully agree with you on that one, don't bother her, be there for her. She won't completely forget you and you will be rewarded once she is better.
This is a great opportunity to prove yourself and your intentions. Be a perfect gent and make no mention of the device or sex.
Simple. If she locked you, stay locked. Had exactly the same dilemma as you recently and that's what I did. And as someone else observed, my wife appreciated that I had stayed locked and I was rewarded!
Thank you so much for all your replies, this is what I love about CM, a community of people who you can share things with and get good advice. I read these in bed this morning and had resolved to stick it out and not raise it with her. I then got up and found that before she left the house for the day she had left the key out for me. Mixed feelings for me, but it will lead us now to having a conversation about it.
That's great! Now you've got to wonder if it's just a test? Lol I'm just kidding =P Seriously though you could take this opportunity to unlock, clean, shave really well, and then stretch out for a while. Maybe write her a love letter thanking her for leaving the key but also explaining how you've been feeling. Let her know how important it is that she's playing a part in the game. You could even suggest that some intimacy could still be enjoyable for her. The possibilities are endless but I think it would really show her how much you want her to take part in the game if you locked back up before she got home and in your note describe a situation that she may find enjoyable. Cuddling with her while you tease and edge yourself until she says you can stop or orgasm. Maybe telling her that you've really enjoyed having some free time but you've locked back up without getting off because waiting until she can experience your orgasm is important to you. =) I suppose you could rub one out and still do all that stuff though lol =P
I agree with Sarah8. Take this time to clean up, but I think you should lock back up. When she gets home and when the time is right say thank you for leaving the key, but let her know you have locked back up. Explain that you appreciate the time out to clean and haven't masterbated, but you would like to stay locked, because you are enjoying the feeling. Hand her the key back. If she gives you the key back then unlock and leave it for a while. Me and my wife have been in a similar situation due to her Fibromyalgia. We stopped for a while and I brought it up in conversation after a while. I also chose to go on honour based chastity for a while, which worked for both of us.
A great opportunity for you to show her afterwards how you managed your chastity well and your devotion to her, keep on caged!
Dear sci-fi forum...should I dress for the convention as Sherlock Holmes or Star Wars storm trooper? I’m not sure what you thought you were going to hear but you won’t get too many clanging their cups against the bars shouting for freedom here. My only suggestion if you stay locked, which I think is the way to go, is to make sure you keep yourself in check. No pouting, reminding, guilt or anything that will make her feel bullied into playing. That could ruin her sense of control, and it would be like she was always just performing for you. I know that is exactly what I wouldn’t want. If you can’t let it be, I suggest you accept the key and tell her it will lock back up as soon as she wants you to. Good luck
On reflection she left the key for you? Or She just left the key.... in that she did not take the with her. Are/Were you just reading too much into the fact that the key was not with her and seemingly available. You could read anything you like into that key being there. But consider this No instructions or permissions were given and it seems none had been asked for. The sane thing to do would be ignore it until she says something or you know she has noticed it. You could let her know you have seen it and still say nothing, place a flower of the kind she favours beside it or something similar. If then it continues to be left there, you could politely mention that althought you have not and would not cheat by using the key you realy would prefer it if your own access to the key was not so readliy available.... which might prompt a discussion Which is what you really want .... from your side about her please not allowing you the key and you being very serious about wanting to be denied by and for her. Or perhaps she might tell you why she left it.
The game belongs to you both but the rules are all hers its not your place to judge her actions... question to learn why sometimes might be acceptable.
We had a good talk about it, and agreed to give it a break (go uncaged) until she is feeling better. Given there’s nothing sexual at all happening while she’s unwell that seems reasonable. I’m going to keep myself chaste until she’s better. She said she’s sorry for not being up to playing, what a gem, thinking of me while she’s sick. She’s a keeper, my girl!
the title of this original post isn’t relevant anymore, but thought I would continue in this thread. After agreeing to take a break while my wife is unwell, after a week I told her I wanted to lock back up, better to deal with the lack of intimacy at the moment this way, she agreed to take the key. This morning she was sitting up in bed, she was feeling a little better, I put my head in her lap, and she stroked my hair, wonderful to feel her touch again. I then got up on my knees, we kissed gently for a while, she then reached down and stroked me through the bars of the cage for a few minutes. The feelings are fantastic, but really ramped up when she stopped, and the sudden absence of her touch left me throbbing and pulsing for a few more minutes. I’m perfectly happy to have only this occasional level of intimacy while she’s unwell. I thanked her later for the “cuddle”, she smiled beautifully. We, rather, I, couldn’t have got to this type of intimacy before chastity and denial, I would have just got grumpy at the lack of sex. Things are definitely better for us this way. It may be several weeks until she has recovered, I won’t be asking to be unlocked, I’m happy to stay locked until whenever she’s better.
Whilst I do think you have made a sensible decision I can't help notice your wife has been ill a while and continues to be so yet you went to her to be cuddled rather than give her the same intimate non-sexual attention. Just an observation on my part but something you might want to consider.