Hi folks, This is may be the oddest introduction you'll ever read. Both my wife and I are coming on for 63 years old. My libido is ridiculously high for my age - I want sex every night - but my ability to orgasm does not match that and it can take 45 minutes to get me off (after I've satisfied my wife, obviously) on the nights we do have sex. She does not want sex every night, more like every second or third night and that may be only because she doesn't want to disappoint me. She admitted to me recently that she sometimes feels guilty when she refuses sex. So I've turned to a form of chastity to try to solve two of these problems. We just today signed a contract that limits me to between 1 and 3 orgasms each fortnight. That must strike most of you as luxury and I agree that is not very high on a scale of orgasm denial but there's always the option to change the numbers later. I'm hoping that this will improve my orgasms, make them better and easier to obtain, and at the same time take the pressure off my wife, no need for her to feel guilty about refusing an activity that isn't going to be for my sexual release anyway. I was prepared to buy a chastity device but my wife was not happy about that as it would make our sex less spontaneous, which means that this has to work on the honor system. One advantage I have at my age is that I can last. I never come before my wife during intercourse, in fact I don’t come during intercourse at all unless she pinches my nipples hard. I am also hoping that reducing my orgasms won’t change that so she doesn’t get a worse sexual service from me. Guess that’s about it for now.
I probably should have added that I'm not Spanish. I'm a British ex-pat. Would have preferred the union jack flying under my avatar but the flag is obviously determined by the country of residence.
:welcome: CumLess, I do apologise for my delay in welcoming you to the Mansion, life is hectic right now! Sorry also about the flag thing... I'll ask pet about that. Lucky you to be in the sunshine though. What a great use for chastity. I do love hearing about different styles of denial and their uses. I personally think there's a lot more to chastity than just "lock up for as long as possible" I can't wait to hear more about you.
So true, Mistress Watchful, so true. One reader of my blog wrote to me about a very similar topic and I wrote a post about it - how as men get older they can start to suffer from "performance anxiety". The chap who wrote to me said male chastity removes from him the need to "perform" so he can relax about the whole thing (which then ironically makes him hornier and more likely to be able to perform, even though now his device means he can't ). On a wider note, much of what people write about male chastity is just silly nonsense - and the biggest nonsense of all is that it's somehow "enforced" with the man being kept in that state against his will. As I frequently say: male chastity is something you do with a man, not to him. Sarah.
I agree, it's not about one person doing something against another persons will. Chastity wether it be male or female should be used as a sexual relationship building block.
Actually, if you're in your 60's and the wife still wanted sex every 2-3 days - - you're the envy of almost every senior couple on the planet. That's the average for the quintessential married-with-kids couple in their 30's, you know.
I am aware of the statistics. Remember that they are only averages. When you research this a bit more you find that the average for a couple in their 60s might only be once a fortnight but there are other 60 year olds who manage it 3 or more times a week. So there must also be some who are managing single figures each year! But I was wanting sex every night (for reasons that are not relevant) so the disparity in our libido was large and no matter how her performance compared with the average for our age it was causing me a lot of frustration and she was getting distressed at having to refuse me so often. An orgasm restriction agreement was my suggestion for dealing with her distress. At the moment it seems to be working. My wife is much more relaxed about refusing sex. We've have sex only about twice a week since we started this but she has tended to have more orgasms per session so her orgasm count per week has slightly increased. Mine, of course, is very much lower and my frustration much higher.
If its just sex drive being different and or your having problems I wonder if your doctor has any suggestions? I might be possible to help you and or her to be better matched and more capable. - Jimi