I'd guess I saw the first images of a male wearing a chastiry cage around 2005, maybe? It def sparked my interest. Then the hunt was on! Back then...
Lol, fantastic!
Good 'ol fashioned silicone lube here. Liberally. I may try a scentless baby oil gel if I ever run across it. Heard good things.
For me (and us) it's not about control or submission. It's just plain fun! Could be along those lines.
I've worn off and on for a long time. Years. Never an issue like that. Thankfully! Good luck moving forward.