We have been working on our FLR for about five years. I remember in the beginning when searching the web for “Female Led Relationship”, the query returned maybe fifty to a hundred informational sites (most garbage), and a lot of porn. Definitely fringe. Especially when including chastity. Last night I did the same search and returned many, many hundreds recently dated since 2020. Most subscribe to the levels of FLR including polyamory for the woman and chastity for the man at the more intense levels. Although many sites seem to be regurgitating similar content, there is a lot of it out there. Without being too scientific, or whether you agree or not, FLR and chastity is potentially hitting a lot of eyeballs. What does it mean?
Actually, I just went to google. 410,000,000 results. I would need help to sort through them to see if they are legit.
not really sure more eyeballs on flr web sites is a good idea. i have only read a handful of the flr sites. i have found them to be distorted at best and some porn like. when we started i was unaware of the flr term. it just felt like the right way to live tough it does not require a submissive xy and puck is not. a chastity cage did not and does not mean no sex. it is just a tool of control. our polyamorous relationship does not match what i has read either. a polyamorous flr require a real commitment of all participants. with extreme time management it has allowed us to have children while maintaining our professional careers. yes, the income of 6 is far greater than 2 but so are the needs. each of us having 3 or more children magnifies chores by 3 at least. our laundry room has two washer and dryers going all the time. everyone has to pitch in. no time for someone to sit out from doing chores. relationships between spouses is sexually and personally rewarding but more time consuming than one might imagine, 6 times not counting children. not spending the time causes more difficulties that are even more time consuming. it is hard work and alone time is kept to a minimum. i am not complaining. i would not have it any other way. i love my spouses and all our children. just it is not the fantasy the flr sites seem to make it out to be. maybe i have not found the right one which is likely the same for most other people as well.
I tend to agree. The fact there is so much out there. Including articles from mainline outlets. It makes you wonder if they are at least raising awareness, even if it is distorted. I think we sometimes see that in new members. They often subscribe to the fantasy portrayed in the media. You can tell when they begin describing the lifestyle they want and the frustration they experience when their partners don’t immediately and fully embrace it. It must be hard on their relationships.
You have to mesh as a couple first IMHO, before you start adding kink. And that's what we are talking about here, isn't it? The kinky part. Lots of couples, maybe even the majority of them, are female - led. It's just formalizing that leadership role, making it strict, adding domestic discipline and all the 'other stuff' that makes it our kind of FLR. Therefore, by default, an FLR is an evolving, dynamic relationship that is constantly changing as the couple finds and discards things that work for them. I think that is what makes them so vibrant and interesting.
Maybe it's that Chastity is getting more mainstream that people are understanding all the benefits that it can bring to their relationships. I've thought about this many times over the years that the Keyholder could get their partner to do anything once they take control of the keys. FLR just seems to follow.
I disagree. Exploring kink encourages a couple to more open and completely honest with one another. It opens a flow of dialogue and leaves you in a very vulnerable place with your feelings and emotions exposed. It helps you connect on a deeper level mentality and can strengthen a breaking or failing relationship.
I see your rationale, but I disagree. I feel there has to be an established trust and loyalty before any dialog about kinks happens in an honest and open way. A troubled relationship will not have those elements in place. No man is going to tell his wife or gf he's open to being pegged or dominated if he thinks she will hold it against him.
I dont condemn FLR in any way, but Ive have too many problems with someone having power in a relationship for me its a partnership outside the bedroom. I cant feel like an adult if Im not making decisions for myself
FLR's aren't about the female making all the decisions, that's too much work for her. It's about her taking the leadership role. The President doesn't tell the worker bee in the Department of Drudgery how to evaluate widgets, he or she just expects it to get done. You make decisions as a submissive male all the time, you just have to make sure it advances your dominants interests and they would be satisfied with your direction.
There is def more than before but most of the sites that pull up are still pretty janky or just straight fantasy no better than a tumblr caption account.
A lot of the folks posting here are in loving, successful FLR's. None of them are the same, but there is a pile of good info and helpful posters on this website for anyone wanting to learn about FLR's work. I'm an enthusiastic devotee. I've been married for 20+ years, a few years in a traditional relationship, transitioning to egalitarian, to finally Wife-led. The last 5 years as a submissive to my Wife have been magical for both of us.