Dominant wife Tips

Being dominant in a relationship, and more pertinently, acting in a way that could be viewed as selfish isn’t the natural order. It’s not something that your wife has done for many years of you being together and so this takes time to get comfortable with.

As @Queenservant has said, it’s four years of growth into this role for his wife. My wife too has taken years to really be accustomed to it. An example though, this morning my wife woke me up very early and told me she needed fuel. She works next door to petrol station and there is no need for me to go for her. Except, there is now an expectation that I am here to make her life easier. So I got up, got dressed and took her car before returning to make her breakfast. It has taken a long time to get here and this certainly wouldn’t have happened before we ventured into this lifestyle.

She didn’t need to order me around, scold me or threaten me with a caning etc. we don’t live in a BDSM porno. We do have a very clear Dom/sub relationship. It’s just more subtle and she’d never state that it’s the case.

Now, it’s easy to tell your wife thats what you want. It’s easy to say that it makes you happy. It’s easy to give her ideas about what to do… but to her that eventually will feel like a chore. There’s got be something in it for her, and in this case it’s pleasing you with something tangible. Something real. A reward.

In my relationship it was always the case that I would get a reward when I completed ‘x’. The. She saw I could do that, and more importantly I maintained that going forward, the reward was only granted when I completed ‘x’ and ‘y’. And then ‘x’, ‘y’ and ‘z’ and so on…

I complete the full alphabet routinely these days. If I missed ‘c’ or ‘g’ it would give just cause for her to revoke my rewards. I work all week for her and it’s all become very natural for her, to add one more thing to my list is just something she is absolutely comfortable to do. Missing my rewards when they are already quite scarce (maybe once every couple of weeks, or more if I’ve been really good.) is something I am not going to allow to happen.

Ps. she doesn’t threaten me with canings as she knows I ‘enjoy’ it, I get hard and juicy so I must. It’s a reward believe it or not.

 

I'm in permanent chastity. It's been 4 years now without release. It can be rough at times.

 

For us, we have set specifics in and out of the public. I am always expected to act as a perfect gentleman in public. I am to never miss a detail… car door, her chair, etc. I always walk behind her and never lead. All of these things are simple chilvary things. I had to read the book “how to be a gentleman” and I am expected to follow it completely. I refer to her as dear and the occasional yes ma’am. When I mess up and I do, she can simply whisper a number in my ear, which usually means xtra days added. If I really mess up, she will put her hand on my arm which means pay attention now. If that happens, I expect to be really punished. It all comes down to what you both want and and very good communication. The funny thing is when we are in public, her friends often tell their husbands they wish they would be a gentleman like me. Little do they know I am in chastity and submissive to my Princess who holds all the control.