Alright. I have tried to open this topic in the thread about uncaged chastity and it seems it is lost there (although at least it relive that interesting topic). As I think a lot of guys here may be in similar situation I would start this as thread on its own. So... after long time in Ds relationship where I was kept chaste I am in situation I am alone without keyholder. As submission is important part of my personality I cannot say all these things dissapeared suddenly as the relationship ended. It was several years long and during that times I have learned some routines. The rules I had to adhere I accepted as a normal part of my everyday life. Moreover I have to say the lifestyle I have lived made me feel good and it suited me well. In current situation I try to continue to adhere most of rules even I am alone. Of course some of them are less suitable for life of a singler, but many of them were pretty practical and I am able to continue without feeling I am doing anything strange. However even as I am natural sub there are moments when I am tempted to be more relaxed and lenient and put this discipline level far inches lower than it used to be. But everytime it happens and I made some shortcut I always feel guilty or at least something deeply in me tells me I should do better. If I can speak about topic of chastity (which is just one of many topics I am writing in this thread), even it has been few months I have still not misbehaved, but I have not worn chastity device as I used to. Today, after a discussion with one lady, it made me think about it again and even I never broke mental chastity, I restrained myself again and put my device on again. Another interesting and new thing I have to deal with was quite unexpected. I assumed the most difficult aspect will be problem with lack of self discipline in this new situation. But as I explained above, it is less difficult than I thought. The far more difficult is how to channel the submissive desire when there is no woman I belong or who control me. After many years in chastity/FLR/Ds relationship this never was an issue. But now the perspective is radicaly different. I feel there is strong desire in me to submit someone and each day being chaste the desire is stronger. I would not explain this as sexual desire only - even if there is probably strong sexual part of it. I can speculate a lot of guys would idenify this is "horniness" a desire for sexual release, but I feel it is more complicated and refined and dealing with it as a with simple sexual desire "wanting to cum" seems to be degradation of this desire. It doesn't mean I would consider sexual desire as anything wrong, but it seems to me this is somethig more layered and dealing with it in just sexual way is ignoring its other layers. I would be interested how this see others if there are people in similar situation.
hi i had a similar reason when i was single i couldnt resist misbehaving. i have never really been in long enough relationships though to impose such trust in my previous partners but what i did have was a good friend that understood and she held my key and still is my keyholder (even though im not in chastity). there is however a good idea and that is to post your keys to youyrself or a post office a good journey away i hope that helps
My main "problem" is not the fact I would deal with tempation or impossibility to remain chaste, althought I would not lie there are moments difficult to avoid those thoughts. What really makes my current situation new and difficult is some confusion how to channel my feelings of my very deep desire to submit - at least at same basic level - to a woman. After quite long time living in a Ds/FLR/chastity relationship which shaped my world around the woman, all these things were deeply connected with her. Of course, as a sub they are still parts of my personality and did not vanish, but even after months I have been struggling how to process some of these feelings. It's difficult to explain, I realized that sometimes it makes me to feel and behave - at least on subconscious level - even more submissive to all woman around me than before. Probably it would sound a little bit odd. It doesn't imply that during my relationship I was an alpha macho to other women. I have always been well behaved, gentle and with good manners. But now it makes me think if sometimes these sub feelings do not interfere with - let's say - common sense how is expected to behave.
I do have someone with which I may leave my keys. She knows what they are for and is willing to hold them for a random time unknown to myself. But it seems rather empty and a little pointless even though just being locked satisfies something I 'd much rather be locked and denied by partner I cared about because she enjoyed keeping me locked for her pleasure.
Interesting topic, I feel like I've reached a new mental level with chastity. Although I don't think I'd self lock if I were to be single again but the way I've been trained over the last year and a half has adjusted my thinking and makes me crave this type of relationship. It would be hard to start over with someone else and God forbid that ever happens!