I am very lucky to of find my Goddess the one i am in service to. We met through Kinklive.com when she was on cam. At first I was just some client who loves redheads. I came upon her do to my local BDSM community and that many are doing cam under Florida Fetish Cam on the kink live website. During one of the Goddess day working on Cam. I teasingly asked if I could bring her coffee or something. She said yes and I went to the local BDSM club to deliver her drink. The glow in her smile was amazing as she saw me for the first time. She announced to everyone that her slave bought her a drink. She then came to great me on the side. Having me kiss her hand and we talked some. We decided to do our first session in person and it did take a while as Goddess is extremely business do to pro Domination, clips4ale, modeling and so on. It was maybe 2 weeks after our first meeting that we played. We meet at the club then I drove up to a nearby nail place to get our nails done and to get to know each other more. When we got back to the club she got dressed in her latex outfit and then put me in my collar and leash. She lead me to the restroom to do my makeup. She knows I am a Trans woman but wanted to do my Makeup anyways. She then put a wig on me that did not last as I have long hair anyways. After the makeup Goddess lead me around both rooms showing me off to everyone. i was her prize for the night. Once ready she lead me to the Web and started to cuff and chain me. Oh I was also naked by now. Goddess got out her penis pump and used it on me as a makeshift chastity during play. Goddess Started with her hands and giving me a very good spanking. She added other toys also, like floggers, dragons tails, paddles, one that has needles on it, canes, and other goodies. I should know as must where my toys like the dragons tail, rose flogger and the paddle with needles on it. What can I say I am a pain slut. I stated to do what I do in my personal subspace but laughing and giggling. This is my heaven and man it is a night I wont forget. She scene stopped when she broke skin. Goddess was so wet herself and gave me a nice smell of her scent as an reward. Of coarse aftercare came and I got to lay my head on Goddess lap. to Me a Dom/me needs to do Aftercare and if i play with someone who does not I normal leave. It's very important to care for the sub/slave As it was getting late we both left for the night but the next night she had me come over to her place. She wanted to use me while another watched. No we did not have sex. She was doing impact toys on me while the other watched. She ended the night by giving me a PA piercing as she tried to use a chastity cage on me but none worked. The pierce that was done by her hand was the symbol i needed for ownership The next day Goddess left for Hawaii. She travels a lot to meet her subs/slaves and to do video work. She was gone about 3 weeks When she returned she rested a bit but then one night came over to my place and we dyed my hair. We were trying to match mine to hers.. Another time we worked out together and she came over again and before she left she did golden shower on me. We do have great days together and between all of this we did some came shows together. Go figure me a Kink live model. During one of the cam sessions we had a client want her to do golden shower on me. This is the first time I would drink from her. Though we where not supposed to do golden shower on cam lol. Sometimes Goddess will go weeks without talking or texting me. Again she is very busy and even needs her space. It's hard when she does not respond back by text and it did get to me. In my Past I suffered depressions but lucky I been off the anti depressants for 2 years. Most tgirls end up on the pills but the did a lot of damage to me. anyways I got scared and paranoid and I kept asking if she was ok. Sometimes she said would call me but did not. in time she did but I was still getting down. I wrote and email and text to her thinking we where breaking up. She had come over late one night and I thought we would break up. She had me suck on her elite slave who was visiting from overseas then he sucked me off. After she sat me down to talk. I was not allowed to speak. She pull her foot down on things and said i was on punishment. Had me kiss her feet and i left for the night. Goddess the next day went to NYC to make clips. Been there a couple of weeks. i was texting only once a day but she did not reply. Most likely do to punishment. I saw a guy asked to film with her. She said let me know before the 23rd as she is going overseas. I upset as i was taking Goddess out for my birthday on the 22 of May. I been trying to ask her if dinner is still happening but i barely get anything except she would call when conven for her. It's a week away and I hope I did not damage anything. I do love my Goddess and will do anything for her but being punished is hard when all i want is one answer about dinner. After all it is costing me 150 per person for the both of us. i want to do something special and i cry thinking i messed up. I know the hormones effect my mood swings, but i don't want to lose her. i connected to her in many levels. Is it wrong to love your Mistress so much? I pray it can be fixed and that dinner will happen Friday. After all she is back home. If depression has come bac hope i can keep it at bay so i don't lose another Mistress. I will keep everyone posted.