What is your reason for chastity? What is your kink?

Madam and I have always been in a bdsm/flr relationship, she discovered male chastity and as soon as she did she wanted me caged and locked to be fully under her control.

 

It's a dominance and submission thing. She loves being in charge of everything and I have a submissive kink. We both get turned on by her control.

 

It was always a self lock and kink kind of thing for me,
I tried introducing me ex-wife while we were still married, She had no interest at all
in anything outside the super vanilla life.

 

Ditto for me!

 

Im locked up at my wifes request (orders) to keep me in line. Too much masturbating otherwise and not focusing on the important things in life like serving my wife and Mistress needs first always. Been locked 24/7 for many yrs now. I would have it no other way

 

Many things! the power exchange is a big one. I love that my wife has control over me in that way. It also seems to make me a better submissive. I enjoy the long term arousal far more than the short term satisfaction of an orgasm

 

Two reason: 1: it turns me on to think about being controlled by my wife. 2: it keeps me from spontaneously cumming if my wife is about to cum or if I am blowing a guy

 

I like being a sex toy, a slut

 

The reason why i am in chastity is easy. my wife dont want me to jerk of so often. I did it always and everywhere. Even at work, in bath, in bed, in garden and many other places. That was the beginning of a game between her and me. She bet that i could not stop jerking even for three days. To prove that i am able to, i bought an chastity cage and pulled it on.
Because it was a cheap and heavy version i wasnt able to wear it more than one or two hours. So i loked for other types and models. After two long years i found finally my Holytrainer Nub. My wife loves it when my little one is caged, i love it too and i think i am addictetd to chastity. I feel naked if i have to leave home without my cage on.

 

The feel of it keeps wanting to cum, whilst it makes sure that I can't. That makes me treat her the way she deserves. I am quite literally locked and it's great.

 

The initial reason was just another “toy” for us to play with. Now the reason I’m locked is because my wife loved it so much she made it part of our life.

 

We met on this basis as such my partner already liked the idea of chastity.

For me I have an extraordinarily high sex drive (can orgasm many times in a day) to the point I wasted so much time it ended up having negative effects on my moods. When I discovered the concept of orgasm denial and chastity some weird fucked up wiring in my brain was triggered and it hasn't gone away even after 15 years or so.

For me the kink is not having control over when I can orgasm and that control is held by my partner, it has almost been an obsession and taken many devices and years to finally get the point where I really cant escape and its very hard to orgasm in the cage, and those implements that can make me orgasm in my cage are controlled by my partner.

Truth is if I asked my partner if I could stop wearing it I doubt she would worry too much, we haven't had a break from it for years now but its usually me that initiates being locked again. I think us men obsess over it far more than our female partners, but its a simple fact of how we are built.

In some respects its sad to think I have to lock my dick in a cage to help not masturbate. But the result is that it does keep me focused on her and only having on average one orgasm per week instead of sometimes 50, that one orgasm is pretty toe curling. She does recognize it helps keep me focused on her that said I would still love her just as much if she decided she didn't want me wearing it, but id probably start sliding back into bad habits.

This may be the first year where I will orgasm roughly the same amount of times as she does. Presently I think I am 2 in front but I am sure she will deny me at least a few times before the end of the year. I used to habitually (with permission) have a stroke or a quicky the morning after we have sex, this year I have chosen to give that up, but she didn't ask me too, I have set myself a target of her having more Os than me this year.

I do miss the days when she would have me lock back up the moment I was soft enough to stuff it in the cage lol. But that's part of the fucked up wiring.

 

It may take years for me to understand it but it’s so much better then the same old same old.

 

Appologies - this ended up being longer than I intended.

For myself, I have both a high drive, however, I'm not particularly good at letting go. I tried to be dominate with my wife in the early days - but, this could never be sustained - the kids as well took up a lot of our time but now they are growing up and we're able to start exploring our own relationship again.

I am also ASD (autistic) and have always found touch, and being touched very difficult. Whilst I love the feel of a woman - soft and squishy I was always terrible at initiating. My first attempts to find a girlfriend were unsuccessful (I told the first person I went on a date off when she threw litter out my car) It was only when I met the lady who became my wife that I found the person I was going to spend the rest of my life with - and we've been together now for around 21 years.

The ASD, which was diagnosed in my 40s, my late teens & early adult life was quite anxiety filled - and at one point I could barely leave the house! I persevered, and managed to work my way up, and have a relatively well paid job in tech. I was good, and am good at having platonic female relationships, I would not describe myself as someone who approaches etc. and yes I have been unable to speak to some women as I would literally freeze unless I got to know them well. I always liked it when there was a lady in a team I worked with as I could get on very well in a professional environment with female colleagues - there was no pressure to have a relationship you see.

The worst part for my poor wife though - is I can't stand kissing with tongues - erkh! I have a very strong gag reflex - but that is caused by stress / anxiety / tension etc.

Touch goes slightly further though, in which I find very light touch really difficult to handle and unpleasant, so I don't like for instance being touched on my stomach or neck area (neck would cause a gag reflex to!!

I also have an incredibly stressful job - and don't switch off very easily. Again, the obsessive aspect of autism means I struggle to switch contexts, but also where I get stressed is in overload from work - which can lead to an autistic meltdown which are not pleasant both for me to have and her to watch me have.

My wife is my rock and I am so blessed for her love and support! Note - I'm her rock to, and support her and try to help strengthen her and help her to grow.

It's because of this, and the fact that although I have a high drive, but poor ability to be intimate I began to look towards this as a kink. My wife, although likes intimacy - does find letting go hard as well - so this is a way for use to be a bit 'naughty' and she can explore her darker side. It's been a 3 year journey so far - attempt 3 but this time - think we've cracked it.

So chastity for us is that it has helped me re-focus after a hard day, and also be more focused on her. Even after 15 or so years of marriage found being intimate very difficult. It may sound weird, but the asd side means I have sensory issues, and am very much driven by textures, feels and smells and so absolutely love it when she wears lingerie, stockings etc. The look of a dress or skirt is amazing on her, but I love the feel of the fabric etc.

I do, however, quite like heavier handling, and we're in the middle of finding how hard I can take it - though, I'm not into anything that might cause injury. I'm basically letting her vent over my lack of organizational abilities, and my inattentiveness to her.

- I've now found a magic button on her as well - so she is getting more and more enthusiastic about this arrangement (sometimes more than once an evening) as we build ourselves into this. G - I can't believe it took me so long.

Summary - Chastity is a way my wife and me are able to have our own space away from daily life, something we can build together and do something between us that makes us happy and keeps us strong together. It looks like will be at least 42 more days after already being in a cage since early Jan as well! Hey ho.

 

Thank you for sharing!

 

I'm self locked just do it cos it feels and looks good .never shown anyone apart from photos on here and fetlife .for my kink I've started using estim but got a lot to learn looking for a HFC with it

 

Frustration, powerlessness, degradation, and a healthy amount of deliberately induced stress

 

Hard to say as I am single. but for me, it I would have a true GF, it would mean aside from the kinky part a commitment towards her. Regardless of gender equality, the world is still dominated by man, and with this could be some kind of equalization between us.

 

My wife jealousy......

 

I'm caged for her. She gets to decide when I get hard and when I can orgasm. I no longer own a penis and it's such a relief. That is why I'm in chastity.

 

No idea. I like it? Even without active participation by my wife it makes me happy.

 

Have I already answered this? My gf loves this for some reason. She really likes me having almost no erections or orgasms.

 

Abbiamo deciso di comune accordo dopo tanti anni di non scopare più.... anche a me....era venuta noia la figa....sono sempre stato bisex ma abbiamo deciso di stare noi due insiemesenza altre persone. Così abbiamo iniziato a fare dei giochi erotici e la castità il gioco della castità mi piace e anche a lei piace vedere il mio cazzo chiuso in gabbia .... che cerca invano l erezione.... con e stim le do in mano il telecomando per aumentare o diminuire l intensità dell elettro. E poi mi fa sborrare con il vibro.. a volte le foto indossare il cazzo in modo da fare l inversione dei ruoli le la donna maschio io la femminuccia. Alle donne piace a volte sentirsi maschio avere la sensazione di avere il cazzo. A me piace toccarle il seno mentre mi sfrega il cazzo... eccitante. Poi l orgasmo rovinato mi lascia una sensazione di godimento che dura ore... non pochi minuti come quando scopi in figa.

 

For me it started as a form of bondage which I love. As others have said it is a bondage that I would wear 24/7 and can't get out of.

I also was tired of initiating sex and being turned down so often. I felt that this could be the answer to my dissappintments. She would have control and She would initiate. In reality it doesn't really work like that for us. I have learned that if I were to not do any form of initiating we might have sex 4 times a year, maybe. But my wife like a lot of females doesn't really think about sex. She is ok having it but only after her motor gets going. She needs help to get that motor going and then she is in the mood. She just extremely rarely gets in the mood automatically.

It is a submission thing as well. Unfortunately she doesn't have a dominat bone in her body but she is trying and she has kept my key anytime I lock up. I never know when she will let me out but she never orders me to lock up.

Then I get off on the idea that I don't have control over when I can get an erection or an orgasm. I think about how many of my friends get to have multiple erections a day, can masturbate, and can have sex with their wives whenever they want. And I can't do any of those things. Having "freedoms" taken away while other people have them is erotic for me.

Lastly I have always liked delayed gratification...no binge watching a good show as an example I have to draw it out. Same goes for the orgasms when in chastity.