The Future of Chastity - Real Talk...

Indeed

 

Unless one is a missionary of chastity, does one really care if anyone else abstains from sex, release, or freedom of genitalia? I certainly don't. If someone else, a single person on the planet, elects to limit themself in some way, neither would I know, nor care. I can't imagine why I would possibly want to promote chastity, nor worry about the "future" thereof.

To suggest chastity is a "kink" is to make a broad-brush assumption. Chastity has long been held as a spiritual pinnacle of behavior; abstaining and living a chaste life has represented a higher means of living, instead devoting one's self to prayer, or meditation or whatever else a given path might dictate. For some, denial of the baser self, and for others, a liberation to focus on something other than sex. For some, purification. For others the proverbial cross to bear. To many, a kink, but certainly not to all.

Technology only matters when it comes to those who care about technology. Do I care if a dedicated processor-driven electric locking mechanism with biometric retinal-scanning technology controls the lock, or a cheap chinese key? Not really.

If chastity practices suddenly became "mainstream," would that change anything for me? Not a whit. I don't care what anyone else does.

Do I gain anything sexual from being locked up? Not really; sometimes frustration, but more often it feels to me as I suspect a bra might feel to a woman. Support, another layer. There have been times in the past when an inconvenient erection might have proven an embarrassment. Cage in place, not a problem. I have found that during periods of chaste limitations, I become more aware of my writing, my work, my studies, my wife and the world in general, and focus less on myself. With a part of me compartmentalized and packed away, I'm free, in practice and symbolically, to focus on other things. Most all of that isn't sexual, nor would I call it "kink."

People have been chaste for thousands of years. If the human race lasts a few thousand more, no doubt such practices will continue. I believe there are many more who practice a given thing in private, than may be attributed to numbers in public. A soundless falling tree in a forest still falls; a chaste person unknown to the world is still chaste.

While a certain element of piousness seems to surround those who are strictly locked for long periods and engage in complete abstinence, chastity may mean many things to many people. I am wearing a cage now. It is not expensive. It is Chinese. It is also the most comfortable I've found so far. I will remove it tomorrow before traveling, and when I reach my next stop, put it on again. This evening, my wife sent a "selfie" of her with the key around her neck. I am many thousand miles away, so by necessity, also have a key. I showered earlier; my wife told me to remove it, then put it on after the shower, and let he know it was one. By the time I did, she was asleep; I'm fifteen hours ahead of her. Was this unchaste, because it came off? I don't think so.

If I have sex with my wife at home, and then return to wearing the cage as she directs, am I not one of the holy chosen, or a fake? I don't think so. If I wear it for a week at a time, am I less worthy, or a play-actor? Why would I care what others call it. My life, my wife, my cage, our path. Not anyone else's.

Maybe wearing it is an emotional safety blanket, or possibly a psychological one. Perhaps I feel better wearing it. If my wife chose not to have anything to do with it, would that change? Perhaps, but perhaps not. I had a cage for a number of years before she knew about it, and often I've worn it when she didn't know, or care. She gains nothing sexual from my wearing it. She tolerates it, sometimes with amusement, sometimes has fun with it. But I don't think she really cares. That's fine. She doesn't have to. Most likely, she participates as a courtesy to me, rather than a drive or compulsion.

The future, for us, is whatever we decide together. In practice, whatever she decides will be the way things are. Should she elect to make it permanent, then I'll abide that decision. Should she choose for regular releases with locking between, I'll go with that, too. I decided some time ago that it's a lot better to defer to my wife than argue with her. Our path may not coincide with the purposes of others, and that's fine. If others disapprove, I don't care. If others approve, I don't care. If my wife chooses to discontinue her participation, that's entirely her choice, and if she elects to increase restrictions, it's also her call. I accept her view and wishes, without reservation. For me, this is simplification. It's low stress. It's liberating. It's me. Others have their own agenda and path. Let them follow it.

 

You come across as a little defensive for some reason I can’t fathom. All this sounds jolly good for you. Personally I just get off on the idea of males being sexually controlled by women. Hence talking about it.

 

Hate to break it to you but wearing a sex toy and getting off on what a woman tells you to do is a kink. I just love the mental gymnastics of oh its being chaste and pure not a kink lol. At least own it

 

Yes obviously it’s a kink! I don’t need that “broken to me”. What’s your point?

 

Oh wait a minute… you were saying that to the bloke who wrote the long essay. My mistake.

 

That was meant for Mr chaste x my apologies

 

Not to mention that a widespread interest in chastity allows for a flourishing marketplace of devices. Competition keeps prices reasonable, and drives innovation. We all benefit from chastity becoming more popular.

 

In end as long as you're being controlled by a woman, told when you can and can not cum etc it'll remain a fetish. Specifically femdom, wearing a device drives that point home. As far as the future don't really care honestly. Me and her enjoy it and we'll keep at it as long she wants to.

 

For me it’s all about revelling in shame so I don’t want it legitimised or de-stigmatised. I like all the traditional gender values to be in place so that I can get off on not fitting the mold.

 

If we're explicitly talking about the virtue of Chastity as it relates to sexual temperance, then okay, I see your point and kink can be left out of the conversation.

But as soon as we're talking about a device locked onto one's genitals, we're talking about kink. To suggest otherwise is troubling in my opinion.

 

To be fair, I think it’s possible for a person to just like having their genitals enclosed within metal for the sensory and psychological appeal, which is not necessarily “sexual kink” in the same way it is for me, for example. Otherwise why all the many elaborate and aesthetically appealing design options, since all you need is some sort of tube that won’t come off.

 

Fair point but form always helps function sell better. Simply put I guess pretty sells faster than ugly. Once a kh or someone controlling your orgasms comes into play its solidly into fetish territory. There's a few here claim it's not a toy but for being biblically "chaste" meanwhile in the equivalent of a sub/dom relationship. It's amusing honestly.

 

It’s our capacity to form preposterous webs of bullshit to dress up our base impulses that sets us apart from the animals tho

 

A person who "...just like(s) having their genitals enclosed within metal..." is a person who likes kink.

 

Also fair. Just not a fan of self delusion in any form. Own what you are and embrace it. Especially don't disguise kink as spirituality lol.

 

Not entirely sure a sharp line CAN be drawn between kink and spirituality. What about the Muharram flagellants of Shia Islam, or cilice-wearing Opus Dei members? And indeed the original meaning of “fetish” is “an inanimate object worshipped for its supposed magical powers or because it is considered to be inhabitted by a spirit”.

 

Let's redefine to chaste then. If you enjoy a woman keeping your dick locked up. For shits and giggles say nipple torture and prostate stuff as an example. You've stepped way beyond the realm of using being chaste as an excuse. No judgements at all. These are some of my favorite things. I also own my kinks as exactly what they are, kinks.

 

Yeah but everyone lives in some form of denial.

 

The ones I can’t abide are the people who say BDSM is a “lifestyle choice” as opposed to a deformity of normal sexual desire in reaction to childhood trauma.

 

A bit like those members of neo-Nazi groups who claim not to be self-hating homosexuals. I mean, just own your stuff!

 

And of course I’m as full of it as the next man, but don’t know what my particular self-deceptions are because by definition I’m deceived about them.

 

I hadn't been back here in some time; a year or so perhaps.

I remember why.

God forbid one not think, act, or speak as you do. Should one think for himself, that's arrogant or defensive. It's arrogant that one doesn't give a fuck if you agree or like it? So be it.

I recall this attitude being pervasive here; one who isn't locked around the clock isn't chaste enough.

You must have kink, or you're apologetic.

For you, whomever you are, be "kinky." I don't "get off on it." If you do, more power to you. Congratulations. Apparently it's your identity. You really can't fathom anyone else doing this who doesn't match your profile, can you?

Too many words, sentences of paragraphs for you? Would it have been better with single-syllable words, or pictures drawn in crayons? Exceeded your attention span? Too bad.

One wonders why it's so important to some of you that chastity become "mainstream."