The latest update from my life. I joined this place a couple of years ago. As a submissive straight man looking for a female led relationship. I did find my perfect mistress and managed to very quickly fuck it up. The idea of being an owned slave of a dominant woman that genuinely cared about me was something that I couldn't do. I did a lot of soul searching and therapy. I realised that I didn't really want to be in a female led relationship. It was just a fantasy. For me my craving of submission and humiliation was quite deep and I didn't feel deep down that I was worth a woman's attention. I'd always been dating men to just for the humiliation and degradation I decided to switch from looking for a mistress to looking for a master. Fast forward to a lot of awkward dating with regular gay men. I have now finally found where I belong I have now been dating men for 3 years for 3 years Now it's been 4 years since 4 years since I had an orgasm I'm always in chastity. About 2 months ago I found a new master And we have very simple views on how we want to have relationships He has given me the name "pussy hole". I am purely his sex slave. We don't really have a proper relationship. He uses me for sex only. I belong to him fully. After he's used me I have to kiss his feet and thank him. I'm very happy with this master. This is my life right now and I'm very happy I found him. My Dick will never be used again. I'm nothing but a pussy hole and proud of it
I'm genuinely happy now, which is weird. Because I am straight and am in a relationship with a man. My brain can't make it compute. But it is what it is
Here's an update Me and my master wanted to see how far we could push the idea that I was never to be sexual gratified or feel sexual pleasure again. All focus is on his pleasure. We call all our sex for rape for that reason, and he made a thing about not caring about if I liked something or it hurt my ass. It's been a lot of fun and surprising just how masochistic I am. He has given me a new name. A couple of months ago (23/9) he decided I would drink all his piss. My new name is "toilet". We talked about that we wanted our dynamic to be more degrading and this is what we came up with. This project of degrading me as much as possible is very much a group effort. Master would like for us to get married. Which I am not comfortable with yet. We also don't live together yet. Something that scares me. For some reason. Too much love, care and attention seems to freak me out. But I am super happy about my master. We seem to both enjoy tormenting me. Hopefully for a long time ahead That was all for now
Me and my master just came back from a luxurious month in Bali. It was amazing to have a month dedicated to nothing but serving him. Bali really is great for kinky fun. It's been three years since I orgasmed now. I don't even crave it anymore. I love it. I used to be addicted to masturbation. Everything revolved around that. I am so happy that is over now. I feel free
I checked my diary last time I came was: January 16 2019 So almost exactly three years. I can't say anything other than that the time I wrote four years, probably felt like four years