Taking advantage of men

We have been into Male Chastity for 2 years now. My Wife(KH) loves having control of our sex lives. She had a stressful career and I think this gives her the chance to be in charge of something she can control. I'm not her slave, but she likes to control my orgasms and the feeling(Power) over me. She's not taking advantage of me, it was me who asked her to put a cage on my cock. I enjoy having her in charge. This M.C. lifestyle is all about her and how she feels. I love my Wife and if this makes her happy and she enjoys it, then I'm all in.

 

EXACTLY!!!

 

I agree completely well said

 

I am the same, my husband reassures me just like you do. You guys are the best.

 

Exactly, I’m not looking for equality in my personal life. I am looking for a smart woman who has sound judgement and good decision making skills.

 

Well if they are into it then its a good thing if they are not into it you have to try your hardest for it to be a good thing if they still arent feeling it dont take the level to high with them each to there own

 

This taking advantage of his lust begins when we first start dating and men behave super nice and attentive to get laid but keep getting shot down. Theres nothing wrong with either, it's just the way it is. Women by far bring the most to the table and have every right to be super critical and selective, and the boy absolutely should have to prove himself to her. When she stops being demanding of him is when the troubles begin. Men need to be kept on a short taught leash and a lady needs to jerk it back regularly. She should never be taken for granted in any way.

Im not typing out a fantasy with my penis here, I honestly believe this is the natural order from a psychological standpoint. Like children craving discipline from too lenient parents. Just look at how much of male generated kink mirrors the trials of young men in love/lust.

What else is tease and denial after all but how adolescent boys feel about dating. Bondage, humiliation, and so on. Fear of rejection, helplessness and powerlessness to gain her affection. All feelings experienced by every adolescent male in the pursuit of that utter perfection that is the female in his eyes, all the while amplified by his raging hormones.

Like anything this advantage can be used for good or evil. But in my experience women rarely associate themselves with evil, and even when they try they usually can't help but include some goodness with it. Such is the nature and beauty of a womans heart.

 

Well said!

 

I guess I don't look at it as taking advantage, if it is what he really wants. Our relationship is so much better when I am constantly lusting after my wife. I am more focussed on her happiness, and she loves the attention that results from the constant desire I feel. We are just more connected on every level. To me, why question it if it just works.

 

I think if more women understood this, they would want to do it more. What wife wouldn't want the attention and greatly reduce their husband's masturbation habit?

 

I would think it depends on the relationship between them.

In the traditional man/woman relationship there's a bond that should be more than doing things for kink/lust/sex and hopefully for most there's mutual benefits.

Similar is the simple arrangement between a domme and her client. Pay you money, you get your kink delivered exactly the way you want it. Less of a compromise there until... Exploitation, taking all someones money or material goods for very little return knowing that they're behaviour is akin to a gambler or addict.

So the actual answer: good if it benefits both, bad if it's findom

 

I only been doing this for life for a month. It makes me really care qhat my wife/KH says when I ask her how her day was. In no way is it taking advantage of anything both parties are getting everything they want out of it. Even it is a kink + or some of us it is a control device because we can't control keeping our hands off of ourselves. I always thought I would do anything for my wife now I know I would because of how the device changes you. Every man should be in a device. It does not make you a sissy or anything unless it is what you want. Like I said I would do anything for my KEYHOLDER not just because she has the key but becausr I love her. But her owning your manhood is sexy as hell to.

 

I have found that the more that I show her how much she means to me, the more she wants me.

 

If I feel appreciated, I want to do more for the person who gives me that feeling. Makes sense.

 

Nice topic ^_^

"Taking advantage" is like taking the reigns or leash of a pliant and willing sub/slave. That's how it translates for me here.

I see it as woman stepping to exercise some of her power within the agreed limits set. And I don't see anything wrong with that.

Now ofcourse where u take this will determine if it's "good or bad" for the parties involved...

 

That's the antithesis of taking advantage though, taking advantage is crossing the lines that were agreed upon.

Just letting your sub serve as agreed has nothing to do with that and should be expected by the sub imho

 

How is it the anti-thesis?

I envision the people involved here is a willing sub/slave and a Domina. It's a kinky thread and I assume we are talking about kinky adults entering the relationship willingly. Or am I wrong?

For me "taking advantage" and "using their lust to control them" is the same banana here. It's an act of control that both have agreed on and imbalance of power that comes with the kinky relationship.

Ofcourse each couple defines each thing differently and u go do u.

 

I think kinky couples define and do things differently and that's just how it is. What works for the kinky couple is what's important.

 

for me the whole point of chastity is controlling lust........just sayin'

 

I don't think you can answer this as a one-size-fits-all question. The boundary between taking advantage in a good way and taking advantage in a bad way is totally based on the people involved.

I know part of the reason I submit is because I want to be controlled with my lust. I'd be disappointed if a dominant partner *didn't* take advantage of my need in order to get what they want out of me; being used in that way is probably one of my favorite things about BDSM. But I can say that because I'd be sure to negotiate beforehand. That's critical to knowing what they want, and also to establish what I know I will do, what I know I won't do, and what I haven't done but isn't a hard limit. Having someone gleefully use the fact they control my orgasms to get me to try a new, taboo kink we've talked about in passing, or do something that I don't 'like' but deepens my sense of submission and vulnerabilty, is the 'good' kind of taking advantage. Breaking boundaries we have already set is the bad kind of taking advantage and I'd immediately end the dynamic.

I would say that major relationship changes are probably a universally 'bad' thing to do based on lust and power dynamic. If you're going to do something like open a marriage, you should probably pause the dynamic, clear your head, and talk it through on an equal playing field.

 

Beautifully put.

As to the original point of the topic, "taking advantage" may have sexual and general meaning. IMHO, it's perfectly acceptable and maybe even essential in an kinky relationship. Sexual needs of a dominant come first. However, if it seeps too much into other areas, it may cause the relationship to deteriorate.
Of course it takes both parties to achieve compartmentalization.