When he wants a break . . . but She wants to keep going.

omin · Jun 19, 2023

Looking for a thing what turns him on, also in time when he not the mood.

BavarianWoman · Jun 19, 2023

MsPamela said: ↑

It's not easy. When I first started controlling hubby's orgasms, it took me a while to understand that there's a huge difference between "denying" and "ignoring". The former can build excitement, the latter can lead to a very negative spiral. Even so, there's a huge gap between realizing how important it is and putting everything into practice, especially with all of life's other distractions.

You'll have to figure out what works best for you as a couple. In our case, something that worked well was to get in the habit of being intimate (even if just in a small way) almost every day. Sometimes it was just a bit of cuddling, or spending a minute kissing before bed. I didn't have to be "in the mood" because it was completely up to me how far we went. Even in the busiest of days, you should be able to find five minutes to connect. The funny thing is that once that habit was established I started thinking about sex a lot more, and these days it's rare for me to go without my daily orgasm.

Words can also be very powerful. Hubby gets a big charge whenever I mention how much I enjoy him remaining caged, or how long I'm going to make him wait for an orgasm. At first, I felt really awkward saying these things. But over time, especially after seeing such wonderful reactions from hubby, it became a lot more natural.

However, I don't want to completely dismiss the other side of this. Perhaps he really does need a break, and that's ok. I really love keeping hubby in chastity, but if he truly needed a break, then we'd take a break. There's nothing wrong with that. The only wrinkle is that I can't always take what hubby says literally. Sometimes he pushes back against something because we're hitting some hard line. Other times it's just because he needs me to be firmer and stricter and can't really admit that. It can be difficult to tell the difference.
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I agree with you, having an eye on his limits. If you can't take him literally, may I suggest to find ways that allow him to be literally. Might help you to understand him deeper and you might link that with rewards about things you would offer him anyways. You are not cruel to him and might understand him deeper.

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When he wants a break . . . but She wants to keep going.

omin New member

BavarianWoman I rule