What's your feelings like if you argue.

I don't know if I'm more vulnerable, but I'm less inclined to start arguments. And that's all the time with everyone I interact with. I like to think it's because I'm a happier person. I'm also more humble. Even towards my children. And this is interesting. The only person that knows about my chastity is my key holder. No one else should be in the game so to speak, but they are in a way.

There are situations in my relationship with my kh when I decide not to argue when I could have. I see it as a part of the lifestyle. I'm usually an argumentative person and this change in personality is part of what like about chastity. It's not easy, but I like it.

The only time I feel vulnerable is when I think about things that might make my kh want to stop holding my key. She could use this against me in situations that is inappropriate but she does not. That builds trust in our relationship. I don't fear her choices. Do you fear any choices your kh could make? Is that why you feel vulnerable?

 

I can see where the feelings you are experiencing are coming from being in the same boat so to speak however since my wife finally agreed to being the dominant person in our relationship at last, and we had drawn up our new list of her requirements called house rules she has the final word.............period!. Life is so much easier this way now whether i fully agree that she is correct or that i was wrong makes no difference to the end result and thus i feel no urge to argue the point as i would have before and just accept whatever she decides is needed to rectify the situation. We spent so many nights before we finally came to this agreement where either one of us would sulk or argue sometimes for days afterwards however in the end in order for me to get her to continue playing my fantasy i ended up apologising and conceding blame, now the problems do not arise and any little points that do seem pointless even discussing as the end result would still be "she is right" accept the punishment. Go for it giving up power totally seems such a big thing until you actually do it for real and then you wonder what all the fuss was about.

 

Mistress has snapped at comments I made, some just poorly worded and others blatantly not submissive. There have been a few times I attempted to defend my position, only to be reminder my position is indefensable. I am teh sub, She is my Mistress.. that is all....

I agree with maxp74 adn Stroppy, it's part of "assuming the position" so to speak. Either we submit or we don't..

 

You're onto something with this post.
The biggest trouble we have is when mistress and I argue. This doesn't happen often anymore but when it does it is not near as serious. But usually revolves around an insecurity or something a bit mental. She has been teaching me to help her when she gets into these states and not get mad about it. The trouble with being
a sub slave to her is the family, our children for certain even both her parents come to me for advice and council. Even one of her brothers has talked out his crisis with me. So when you are given a high place one moment and forced to submit the second minute, there are times when for me it gets hard...even tiresome. I just want to be a slave to her and take care of her. But I do love being loved by
my family. OK so now that I have nearly hijacked this with personal stories, let me actually answer the question.
There is only one way mistress deals with arguing and that is with a cane or a whip.
And I am always sorry.

If there is advice to be given or received it is simply this: bend over and take the punishment, learn from it and remember that she is ultimately your superior. Even if you are smarter than her it doesn't make you better than her.

sk

 

Hello All.
Well, with the dynamic changing as it is I am finding that I really do not seem to be arguing as much about anything. When I am stupid enough to "argue" instead of respectfully discussing a differing opinion with my Wife/Mistress/Keyholder I am only hurting myself. I can plan to be isolated and ignored until I come crawling back apologizing for my boorish behavior. Once I submit and humbly approach a differing opinion this way then a discussion may be had. Generally, the thought does cross my mind in the heat of a disagreement that I cannot believe I would be stupid enough to have let myself slip into the role I have but it utterly amazes me how quickly that fades into regret and disappointment in myself for arguing, upsetting my Wife/Mistress/Keyholder and it doesn't take long before I am wanting to beg for forgiveness and stop acting like a selfish child. Before I know it I am trying to make nice with any kinrd of attention I can think of (usually multiple hour head to toe massages of her sexy, smooth body with no contact of her pussy or breasts permitted) going in knowing that my only pleasure will be the emotional fulfillment of being close to her and the physical fulfillment of being buckled into the plug harness with which I have a love-hate relationship because I KNOW at some point I will be hopelessly gyrating my hips and playing with my nipples physically unfulfilled next to her as she drifts off into deep, relaxed slumber.

allaboutHer

 

You are good! I wish my slave paid attention to you, he is not interested in improving his behaviour , i really like your reflection.. Mostly I like what she does to you,

 

I'm really having a bad week and all I've done is moan. Do everything in the home. No consideration at all from him. Leaving things out all the time and being thoughtless, and selfish. Ohh.. Sorry that would be unfair. I get a cuppa tea in the morning! Being locked up means nothing to him and he is not interested in being teased cos he is too tired so I've been angry and moody and all I get is " are you ok baby!" And all I want to do is kill him!! Instead I've gone onto this and tweeter to keep myself busy and fantasy how exciting this could be!
The worse thing is.. As some of you may know is that.. He introduced me to this and has had this fetish for a very long time which apparently he feared telling me.. I'm soooo confused! I think he is playing mental games with me!! So arguing.?? Well that not it exactly!! Just lots of moaning ... The worse thing is that his fetish is to be submissive and humiliated?? Laughable I know.... Help please!!! Thanks

 

I must admit I am slightly confused. you call him a slave and yet from what you say he seems to be 'calling the shots'. I am no expert but for what its worth my advice is you need to re-establish control, be strong, refuse to unlock him next time he requests relief. Instruct him to tidy up, otherwise he will be punished. Maybe consider a Domme/sub Contract.

 

Hello SLM.
If I were a betting man, I would bet the bankroll that your "slave" is toying with you and that he can and is thwarting his device, relieving himself and somehow getting back in without your knowledge. My cb6000s is fit so snugly and my anotomical buildis such that pulling out would likely result in injury. I also do not have any clue where she keeps her key and the spare key is frozen in the center of a gallon jug. I have written up contracts and she has no interest in following "guidelines" I have come up with...she says we are fine following her guidelines...if I am unhappy I may RESPECTFULLY express concerns. If I get mad and belligerent she leaves me locked and ignores me until I approach her with respect. I HATE being ignored...it sucks. I have gotten so mad in the past I have accessed the emergency key (it used to just be in a sealed envelope) and unlocked myself, but I wore that out and was told I needed to come up with another way to store that key that would give me time to think about my childish behavior before accessing the key because the next time I unlock in a fit of temper will be the end of our chastity lifestyle. So what am I saying? First of all, you make sure he is not thwarting the device...get one that WILL be as secure as humanly poss (...all CAN be thwarted, just with different levels of effort, destruction and self injury) and trash the contract but promise him you WILL be open minded IF he approaches you with concerns. Best of luck to you...if the rest of you is as hot as those cheeks in the avatar and he stops getting relief, his boiling balls and throbbing prostate should make him come to his senses...drill his brain and figure out his fetishes and dangle them like a carrot!
Good Luck!
allaboutHer