It took me 5 years to get into the right circumstances to wear a chastity cage. It ended up in many wrong custom cages, a PA piercing and finally a circumcision. In that time I did play chastity on and off with my ex girlfriend. My record was two weeks of wearing and with that no orgasm (but we took off for cleaning). But in those 5 years I think I didn’t wear a cage for more than 8 weeks total (might be even less). Partly because she was less into the dominating part, but I also fucked up her mood by too much topping from the bottom (big lesson learned here). I restarted chastity play after a breakup with my new girlfriend. She loves me a lot, but is definitely a lot more dominant by nature and strict (if she wants something, she will get it). Of course she wants to be sure I don’t hurt myself, but now she sees I can wear it comfortable for 2.5 weeks and keep myself clean, she is determined keeping me on the idea to not unlock until my flight back (7 weeks total). To set my expectations she let me know that when I am back with her, she will let me maximum a couple hour free on the 19th one time a month. Orgasm will be every two month if I do great, but she thinks 3 months will be ok too. At one point I love it and make me feel so lucky I found her in my life. But it also make me feel scared; I am just 30 and used to masturbate 2-5 times a day (more when alone/long distance). It feel like a big jump which was more like my end goal after years, but it feel a bit like her expectations of me being in chastity are a lot higher. I am not going to complain. I made that mistake before and I truly want to follow her idea here. Someone who can relate? Was it easy to get used to this kind of chastity enforcement?
What is driving her ideas? Her own whish? Or too much information she got on this forum? I assume, she might be telling you what drives you most. In other words, reaality could be a lot different. She might not want to keep you locked for too long. Relax ans look, how it goes. You would get totally new experience. Enjoy. Everything may turns out differently.
Here own wish together with a blog I shared in the beginning. I also told here many times I love to wear it for her. But you are right, now with long distance play it might be more easy for her to be this strict. Can be different wen back together indeed. I hope it will settle down somewhere in the middle.
I introduced chastity to my now wife about 2 months into dating. It would have been sooner, but she was close friends with other friends and I didn’t want to out myself if she ran screaming. Haha. I had played with chastity with my two previous relationships. My longest was two months when the previous ex and I broke up and she didn’t want to give the keys back. It was a month before that. I always had breaks and it was only a semi serious thing. My wife and I had been at it like rabbits when we were first dating, the most sex I’d ever had honestly. But I introduced the cage… She was instantly interested and asked how long I had worn it. I told her my longest and that I had gone a month very often but with breaks between. She left for work the next morning and told me to put the cage on and she would come back that night. We showered together that night and she was shy about the cage but when she saw it on she loved it! She told me she wanted to start at one release a month. That was it, I was allowed out once a month from then until our wedding. Then, one to three times a year after. Come to find out, she was just thinking she had to have all that sex to please me. She wasn’t into piv but thought she had to to keep a guy happy. Long story not so short (sorry), it isn’t easy to adjust but it is so worth it! I wouldn’t go back to being free more often. We have taken short breaks, maybe a couple weeks before I end up locking back up. She is always very happy that I make the choice to lock up. It is all up to her after that. I can’t see you regretting this if she really enjoys it and isn’t just doing it for you. I say just enjoy the ride!
Such a lucky guy My GF jumped right in too. She read some books and blogs, bought a couple of custom steel BAW cages, piercing attached, and a key safe, and once she was confident I could last a couple of weeks without harm etc. she wanted to do an "initial period", which we failed a couple of times due to life circumstances but now well into (70 days since the key was in the lock, and she is adding days so I have 27 days left). It is scary. But I doubt it would be worth the effort without the fear.
It is my understanding that this is true of a lot of women. They only have sex because they have too, to keep their partner from perusing a different partner. Some women love PIV, but when you consider the risk of pregnancy and adverse side effects of birth control, the rewards may quickly exceed the benefits, for the woman. With abortion in its current political/legal state, I have to wonder if an increasing number of primarily young women will say no to PIV, which means no sex in general. (Back when abortion was illegal there was still a lot of extramarital sex happening, even before the pill, society simply tried to hide the fact.)
I don’t think it is my understanding that women don’t like PIV. That was the biggest off putting factor for my wife… in the beginning… she’s got used to it so much now that she doesn’t miss it. But penetration causes far more orgasms than without. She still takes her birth control pill, her reasoning is that she only has her period once every 3 months. like you I asked for this so do my best not to complain about the negatives aspects. The huge benefit is of how we interact together. I do wonder how chastity benefits a long distance relationship, when you’re together it will show just how greater things can be without sex. For now just use this time to get used to the idea that you don’t orgasm anymore.
Feeling great for you that you maintain your desire for chastity for both your previous and current relationship. Even greater that none of your gf’s is adverse to such a kink brought up by a man who by all usual circumstances would like to engage in all forms of sex in the beginning of a young relationship. A man who is not only not demanding sex but also keeping himself chaste for the longest time possible. Shouldnt this be the new criteria for all women looking for in a relationship.? I dont think you are moving too fast.. seems to me she is receptive towards such arrangement that sex, at least for the man, is not a pre-requisite for a healthy relationship. Sex comes in various forms and it should not be penile centric as currently being focused mainly. It is too never too young to engage a life of celibracy and tilt a relationship to be female centered. If i had my way, chastity should begin with boys at puberty and the key of consent, literally, should be shouldered by females from guardians/mothers to future respective life partners and male chastity be made a module in sex education. I will find the time to read your blog.
Interesting observation. So is the silver lining to Dobbs women taking more control and more men ending up locked up?
You could be right. Many women may prefer shopping, looking pretty than engaging in messy sex to feel good. If women can dictate, they would prefer sex to stop at foreplay stage.. the stage where they feel their most sensual self, appreciated and comfortable. Penetrative sex and ejaculation is perceived to be a male satisfaction. Yes, wives agree to sex with husbands to keep them in, satisfied and not wandering off. But it is not entirely true that men wander off because their wives could not fulfill their desires. I have a fair share of male friends looking for prostitutes al though to me, they have such wonderful and beautiful wives. On the other hand, women seeking partners out of marriage usually stemmed from their husbands unable to satisfy them sexually rather than just seeking pure thrill like men.
Even when it was just denial with chastity at night, my first period stretched out to 150+ days. In hindsight, the only thing holding my wife back was technical limitations. Once I had a device I could wear indefinitely, she had me wear it indefinitely. I think this is quite common with dominant women, especially if they aren't greatly into PIV. From the point of sustainability, the correct pace for all this is whatever the keyholder wants.
Nope. My wife can and does dictate. And she likes riding my cock. There are some women that don't like sex; I've known a few. But most women like sex; I've known a lot.
I'm confused but potentially intrigued. Did you break up with your new girlfriend but started chastity after and got back together with her? Or did you have a breakup with a different girl, start chastity, and then find your new and current gf? If the the former, how did that happen?
You are hell of a lucky man.. you get your dick locked and unlock for regular sex… some gotten theirs locked but sex is with some one else..
@MrDoubleyou please it is very very hard for some men to be lock up for ages and ages cos they want to have orgasm a lot and like to be hard and them ones dont be lock up for long times. So really it up to if you can not be hard for a long time and some can do that better than other ones.
Ah.. maybe you should keep some feel good feelings to yourself.. women are such devilish sirens that will launch a tirade of sufferings to you once they learn of your slight joy.. and relegate you to a pussy licker only and be caged permanently.. or maybe that was your wish..
I would gladly please her physically any way she could imagine, but she's so vanilla that Readers' Digest would probably seem like erotic fiction. The good news is that she likes to fuck, and she likes attention, and she really seems to enjoy the way I completely swoon over her now, and I'm up for all of that. I do not desire to be permanently caged ... I'm quite happy to follow her lead on that topic, and I almost never even have to wear it at night, and this summer haven't worn it most days either. Should she insist on me wearing it for some long period of time, my answer would be the same as any other request that she give me ... I am pretty well trained at this point, and very proud and happy for that condition.