Total Denial

I don't think total denial would work for us, I may be handing over control of penis but ultimatly I still want to feel loved, appreciated and yes even desired lol.I may not get a release a myself but I do like to be intimate with my partner.

As always though whats important is that it is working you so enjoy lol.

 

Total denial is torture, not fun. I guess if you find it exciting, then have at it. But even my wife likes to tease me and let me touch her from time to time.

 

Maybe I misunderstand your wording. If it is just access to her pussy that is denied, that isn’t quite as bad. My wife has made it clear that I will never penetrate her again, but she still lets me touch her pussy and occasionally lets me bring her to orgasm by clitoral stimulation. I guess there is still plenty of fun to be had even if she won’t let you touch her pussy if she will still allow other playful activities.

 

My wife has mandated total, permanent penetration denial. As I stated, I can still touch and enjoy her pussy, but my penis will never ever go in there again.

Permanent pussy denial is lifestyle and takes some effort. If you want to give her what she wants, you both have to be committed to keeping things fun and interesting. Biology is still biology and your body will still crave pussy. Eventually the desire gets overwhelming and that’s where the rubber meets the road.

My wife is not an orgasm addict. She could honestly go the rest of her life without one and be content. But she is absolutely adamant that she does not ever want me penetrating her again. So allowing me to touch and enjoy her pussy with my fingers is her compromise to keep me happy. She knows that my biology compels me to find her pussy irresistible and allows me the pleasure of touching it to meet my biological need.

 

I could not survive this way. I am obsessed with pussy -- my highest goal in life is to be permitted to worship her holy vagina and sacred clitoris with my tongue and lips. I want this more even than to be erect. And from her point of view this is the second best thing about my chastity (the best thing being her new calm, thoughtful, intimate, respectful, obedient husband).

 

@Shepherdsflock -- I wonder if I could do this, and I think I could, although it's a hypothetical question because my wife still wants the occasional PIV. But the question your situation poses -- could I go forever with no PIV, but with fingers and oral allowed -- is a difficult one. I certainly would miss the prospect, the carrot, the possibility of her highest reward. But if she became a strict keyholder (she's a gentle keyholder now) with a high degree of discipline, and required regular pussy service while forbidding entry, I think I could do it. But to be forbidden to ever touch or worship the holy place again I could not do.

 

@buildup -- you're still reasonably new here, I think it would help us if you provided more background about how you and your wife arrived at chastity. You've suggested elsewhere that this was her idea, and suggested here that she would like permanent denial. Without core context it's hard to fully understand both of your situation.

 

No touching would drive me to insanity. I NEED to be able to at least touch her there. I don’t really know why, but I think it’s common to every straight man. We all crave pussy in such a way that just touching one is a big deal.

 

Second that

 

This is similar to my situation. In a sense.

My wife is unaware of my chastity (itself only 17 days old) but it's been access denied more or less constantly since she became pregnant with our first child in 2007. Obviously, having had two more children, it's not totally constantly, but I can relate because my wife doesn't really like any kind of touching anywhere. It may be down to the fact that I am far from normal (I have ASD, but we didn't know that until December 2017) or not. The point is that, yes, she doesn't like me stood close by either or too long a hug or too much touching - even holding hands is a bit too much.

She certainly doesn't enjoy any touching of me, so no tease at all, let alone denial.

The main difference is that my wife is as vanilla as they come and when we have discussed anything relating to kinks (I was open about my cross-dressing from the beginning, but she refused to listen and opted to ignore it in the hope that it would go away and not be a thing. In 2011, when it became clear what she had done, she told me that I had not been open enough and later relented to she didn't want to know) she has reacted with some frustration, anger and despair.

In short, TL;DR - my wife is not my KH but it's been ACCESS DENIED for almost a decade, with brief interludes. I don't know what I feel about it, nor how I should.

 

Amen, Brother!

 

I am also “pussy free” my wife made it clear after the cuckolding started that I would not penetrate her again, I am allowed occasional edging when I am very well behaved, apart from that it is anal stimulation only for me.

 

We have a different dynamic, being me, my wife and my keyholder. There is hugging and kissing and affection. There's massages given by me. My wife enjoys PIV, but with me wearing a strap-on. Beyond that, there's no erections while unlocked, no PIV with actual dick, no oral, no manual stimulation by them, or me. If I cum, it's locked, with the help of our e-stim. I may very rarely get unlocked for CBT with my keyholder, which is pretty harsh. Neither woman is big into getting oral, so that's again, a once or twice a year at best thing. My wife likes orgasms, my keyholder has no use for them.

I'm enjoying it. It's really tough of course. There's lots of days that are no fun at all. We do a lot of conditioning to not want genital stimulation or use, and that does help. I focus on giving pleasure, and how lucky I am to have both a wife, and a keyholder. Basically, I used to edge for hours, dreaming of hardcore denial, and now that i have it, I can't masturbate to it. But, I can only get maybe 50% turned on, being locked all the time, so that's better than the frustration from edging, or being edged. 8 months into it so far. One day at a time!

 

Thank you. I certainly understand now why your wife wants control of your erections and why she wants to make access to her holy place rare. It sounds like you know, too, that you are becoming a better, more respectful husband. You were seeing her only with the one eye of your little head; she is opening your eyes to see her, and to see yourself, as a whole person. Congratulations.

 

My wife wouldn’t call it total denial, and she avoids making anything definite* but we share some commonality.

I have no entitlements. Everything is off limits unless she directs it. I have shed expectations and learned to be grateful

I realize that today I haven’t been inside her pussy for a record 121 days today. It’s never been longer than 2-3 months before. She’s allowed me to enter her just 17 times in the last two years* I hunger for it. She tells me she keeps me reminded just so I know what I’m missing. So it’s an active denial. Not a passive forgetting. She keeps the hunger alive.

Her first rule in 2014 was no chasing, and no pushing for more, and no whining or begging. If she wanted to tease me, I needed to be happy with what she gave me. She treated my jumping up for attention like a bad puppy. Sex became completely under her direction.

When that’s coupled with my no self-stimulation rule, it makes my denial complete. I am totally dependent on her for sexual stimulation of any kind.

She loves edging and making me spill over and keeping me hard. I get unlocked each day for her teases and ruined orgasms.

You don’t want to become a eunuch. My wife loves keeping my flames roaring. I’m always ready to be touched and extremely reactive. A nipple tweak and ass grab make me squeak and blush. Hearts rise above my head.

She doesn’t focus on denial as much as the teasing. She knows orgasms wipe me out, and so they are more and more rare each year.

Good luck to you. Make sure she’s feeling happy and loved.


*she likes keeping everything indefinite. Except two years ago when she made her clear and simple rule: “all self stimulation is off-limits” permanently, unless she directs it. She took permanent control over all aspects of my self-stimulation in April 2017. That’s certain. I’m not allowed to fondle parts that bring me over the edge. If she ever learns to make me cum from just nipple stimulation alone, she’ll take my permission to idly fondle my nipples away.

 

Interesting, @Peter Rabbit . Being released for teasing each day seems unusual and quite an investment by your wife. The very limited entry, on the other hand, in increasingly the case for me, too.