I don’t have an underlying question, just mentioning how my wife and I were perfectly opposite and unlocked each other’s needs. Social norms create a boundary and expectation that we sometimes accept without even knowing our true selves. I have always known my own nature, but understood boys aren’t to act or feel that way. She thought she was submissive for no other reason besides that is how she was supposed to act and had never experienced any other way. She unlocked me from hiding my true self, and when that happened, I unlocked her from blindly following in a path that wasn’t hers to begin with. She was never really submissive. Some of the things that ruined her past relationships was her trying to be submissive and then being demanding. It was inevitable. She likes having her way. She likes being in control, she likes to be served, appreciated, worshipped. Expecting those things in a submissive role was unrealistic, and she wondered what went wrong. I was the same, except I knew what I was but hid it. Partners would fall in love with the shell I showed the world. Dominant, confident, masculine, but would eventually grow weary of me being closed off, depressed, keeping my true nature hidden. Those relationships could never have worked because they didn’t even know the person they were with. It wasn’t until I stopped hiding, expressed my true self to someone, that I was ever capable of receiving their love. When I did that, she experienced a new way of life, one that she actually knew who she was. This was right, she could be dominant, and instead of having one foot in each world, she had two firmly planted in one. We are lucky, we found each other, we both were able to come to terms with our own reality at the same time. I don’t believe in plans or destiny, but a whole lot had to line up for two people that need the same thing to find it together. Think I might just give her some flowers tomorrow, just cause.