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Vacation from Chastity

Discussion in 'The Tower' started by PouchPantyLover, May 27, 2017.

  1. So we are leaving on vacation next week. Me, wife and two kids and we're doing a lot of traveling and living out of a shared hotel room. We are also going in and out of places that have a lot of security including metal detectors. After talking it over we came to the agreed conclusion that it wasn't practical for me to try and stay locked up through all this. The result, a 2 week vacation from chastity.

    At first I was pretty bummed about this, but I have started thinking about this idea of a vacation from chastity in terms of other things in my life. For example I enjoy my work, but I'm happy to take a break from that. I love my family, but when I get a chance to go visit some old friend and leave them for a few days, I have a great time. Vacations can give you a break from your routine, but they can also give you a stronger appreciation for what you have.

    So my question to all of you is do you ever take a vacation from chastity? Would you want to? Would it not work for you? While I don't foresee many chances for orgasms there's always a few minutes alone in a shower or late at night. Do I take this "vacation" to bust a nut every chance I get? Or do I stay chaste, just without the device? Will it be a vacation from chastity or just a vacation from a chastity device.
  2. I know of a couple she keeps him locked 24/7 all year and he may more likely will not get an orgasm in that time.

    When they go away on for two weeks every year he is unlocked and their holiday is like 1/2 a honeymoon.
    It works for them and this has always been about each couple does things their own way essentially there is no right or wrong way..
  3. Last year we had a holiday in Greece and travelled with a friend and her teenage children. My Wife decided that I would not take my device with me but I did remain on the honour method for the week. I did enjoy touching my erections but never went as far as masturbating.

    Anyway, Elle noticed a change in my behavior and attitude. It was very subtle and not outwardly too bad, but she didn't like it. Neither of us really understand it but wearing the device does help me be the sub that she has come to love.

    The result is I will no longer go on holiday uncaged. If we travel with other people then I will put my device in my suitcase, but otherwise I will also travel caged if we are in a place which is accepting of such things. This year we had a week in Italy on our own. I flew to Rome caged, spent the entire week locked up and flew home caged.
    Mark Owen likes this.
  4. I think we would stay caged(meaning she may or may not unlock me), mostly because we would need a reason to abandon it. On the other hand, if she wanted a break from the whole works, I could see her taking it off and not even thinking about it for the week.

    I don't think I would spend the vacation jerking it in the shower, I doubt I would even do it without permission once. In fact, if we kept everything as is with me pleasing her and me not cumming, by the end of the week I might be asking to put it back on. I don't need the device to keep me honest...it sure is a lot easier though.
    filltee and Jasmic68 like this.
  5. [QUOTE="...................... by the end of the week I might be asking to put it back on. I don't need the device to keep me honest...it sure is a lot easier though.[/QUOTE]

    On the those rare occassions when I have been allowed to remain unlocked for more than a few hours or maybe before we went to sleep, whether I got to cum or not, I would ask if she wanted me to put it back on yet.
  6. Last year I was on a trip and had to cross the border a few times, we decided I wouldn't wear the cage. We had no set rules about me getting myself off. While I didn't get myself off every day, I had more orgasms in those two weeks then I had for months before. When I returned home she noticed the change in my behavior, after a couple days she had me put the cage back on. There is no doubt it has a major impact on the way I treat her as well as my moods when I can get off at will.

    All and all it was a real eye opening experiment for both of us, it really showed how much of a difference wearing the cage and having my orgasms controlled can make a difference. I think if we were together on a family trip such as yours with the agreement you won't orgasm it should be easy. When alone boys will be boys...lol
  7. My wife and I took a 2 month vacation from chastity last fall. It was nice to pee standing up but ultimately I started masturbating a lot and my wife no longer has having the very intense orgasms she has when I am moaning in sexual frustration after 2 months of orgasm denial. I missed the constant state of sexual arousal. Life is a little boring when I am not getting aroused by every little thing like an exposed shoulder. :)

    We have stopped for a few days here and there due to a medical issue and even two weeks once due to recovering from minor surgery, but our policy is that I stay locked unless it is not practical or safe, which is rare.
  8. Very interesting topic @PouchPantyLover@PouchPantyLover . This is something my Wife and I discussed quite extensively because we do travel quite a bit.
    When my Wife and I travel by car, I stay locked unless we going to stay with family. No need for the kids to bump into something hard in Papa's pants. :D
    A couple of trips back she unlocked me for our vacation. By the time our week was over she was telling me she couldn't wait to get home so she can get her property securely locked up again. lol So now when we travel she will unlock me but once we are checked in to our room she has me locked up before the room door closes. She tells me she likes me better when caged. As @Vinny@Vinny says unless it is not practical or safe, I'm locked.
  9. T minus 3 days to departure. Due to other activities it is highly likely I will unlock tomorrow night and that's it for the cage until middle of June. I'm freaking out a little bit about that. I've been living locked 95% of the time since March. It feels like something is missing when it's not there. My wife noticed a difference in me when I was out for a couple of days recently and commented on it. I actually hadn't noticed anything, so it wasn't intentional. I guess I'm coming around to the idea that this is a vaction from the device, but not a vacation from the lifestyle. Still two weeks of unrestricted access to my penis, plus the last 5 days of my trip I'm alone at a business conference....
  10. Good luck. You will be fine. The time you have spent wearing the device has already had an affect on you. It won't be easy, but it's only a few weeks.
  11. Taking off tomorrow so this is likely my final posting and visit to CM for the next couple of weeks. I'm actually kind of excited for the vacation from chastity now because my wife has challenged me to a game. I can cum as much as I want, but each orgasm equals one month of lock-up. She has also stated unequivocally that she will be trying to seduce me and make me cum as often as she can. She even laughed and said you're going to be locked for a long time after this trip! I'm going to try to hold the line at 2 orgasms as I'm sure I can do two months. Three is borderline and four scares me. Since it's been almost a month since my last orgasm I asked if I got one freebie and she said that's for me to know and for you to find out. Chills....

    See you in a few weeks CM :cool:
    Sublifter49 and Mark Owen like this.
  12. Ouch!!!! I do not like when my choices indicate consequences. I would rather be denied than given one month per orgasm...I would probably be like a dog with a whole bag a food that is supposed to last a month. I would forget the future and shortsightedness would cause me a lot of time caged. In 14 days vacation I could easily rack up over a year in lockdown that way.
    Sublifter49 likes this.
  13. My Wife regularly makes me go for two months and that is... interesting. I once did five and by the time she let me cum she was able to turn me into a quivering mess with the lightest touch or the merest glance. I couldn't look at Tumblr and had to be careful reading the Mansion!

    Enjoy your break. Your wife sounds like fun!
  14. OK, I'm back from vacation, but I'm really confused. Chastity seems almost like something someone else did and I just read about it. Everything that made me so happy seems to pale besides the ability to have unfettered orgasms again. I've reluctantly agreed to put my device back on in the hopes that all the good things come rushing back, but I'm just not into it. I'm not motivated to do things for my wife the way I was and the idea of going a really long time before cumming again fills me with resentment. I know it's only been two weeks, but it seems like years ago.

    The first part of the trip was good. My wife relented and let me have the first orgasm free of our little wager. Then we had two more together. I really enjoyed the experience of having that much sex in a 6 day window. Probably enjoyed it a little too much. The bigger problem came when my wife and kids returned home and I went on to my conference. I decided one more orgasm would be OK and I would enjoy the challenge of the three month lockdown. So I pulled out the computer, started streaming some porn and rubbed one out. This was my first time doing this since February and I guess I was addicted to it, because I responded like an addict. After 3 orgasms in 2 days I forced myself to stop. I literally could have gone for twice or three times that amount.

    I haven't even been home 24 hours and yet all I can think about is my next orgasm. My wife is trying to get us back on track, but she really isn't naturally dominant and with me being resistive and moody she is struggling with it and not enjoying it. I'm hopeful for some epiphany that turns this all around and my brain clicks back into chastity mode. I'm locked up in my jailbird begrudgingly and maybe the physical lock down will purge me of my orgasm obsession. Here's hoping....
  15. Had to go back and re-read this post because I'm leaving on a trip tomorrow. I'm gone a week and traveling by myself and that's how I got into trouble last time. I've been talking to my wife over the last week and suggesting she come up with a strategy to keep me chaste. I feel like if she wants it bad enough she can be creative and come up with a system, but I don't want to tell her what to do. Instead she's been relying on threats, but that didn't stop me last time. As of now she plans to unlock me tomorrow and send me on my way. I'm not sure I'll make it to the airplane before rubbing the first one out. That's exaggeration, but I don't see myself going a week in a hotel by myself.
  16. I so relate to your entire post @PouchPantyLover@PouchPantyLover. .I have been out a month for PA peircing and it will be probally December..at first I hated being out of the cage now I don't know can love going back in..I don't think lll have a choice as my wife wants me back in but there is always that thought I can do what I want. The problem is I don't think we could go back to vanilla and be happy long term..
    PouchPantyLover likes this.
  17. A lot of people here saying that they need the cage to have a certain attitude towards their partner, and once the cage goes off for a while they revert their behavior and it affects their relationship.
    To me that is absolutely sad and unhealthy. Now, I know for a fact that the cage can nudge you towards this or that behavior, but as adults we should all do the right thing regardless.

    If you need a piece of metal on your balls to be respectful and devoted to your wife, then you ARE NOT respectful and devoted. Even a pitbull can be docile if you put a chokehold on it. Being truly devoted means you will do the right thing on your own accord. If you can’t have the proper attitude and behavior towards your partner regardless of incentives, then all your submissive attitude is just fabricated.
    The cage is supposed to complement something that already exists, it cant be the reason why you act the way you act.
  18. I was a loving and devoted husband before chastity. In terms of being involved and helpful to my wife and kids, I'd say I was in the top 25% of "Dad" involvement in our circle of friends. Through out my relationship with my wife I did many loving and devoted things. For you to come in and pass judgement on me and my relationship in this way is based on ignorance, not insight.

    We stumbled into chastity accidentally. What happened for us is it stopped me from masturbating so much. Used to be a 2 - 5 times a week guy. What I didn't realize is how much resentment that created in me towards my wife. Chastity created the right set of circumstances that led us organically into an FLR that has made us both much happier than we were a year ago. The problem as I mentioned in an earlier part of this thread is that I now see my orgasms, especially those achieved through masturbation with porn, as an unhealthy addiction. My trip is the equivalent of giving a gambler $1,000 and a trip to Vegas or sending a drunk to Mardi Gras.

    It freaks me out because I don't want to go back to where I was. Not because I was an ogre, but because I'm better and happier now. Like most people on CM, I'm sharing my story because this is a place to find common problems, solutions and stories. It's mostly a place of support and help. So thanks :rolleyes: for your understanding
    bondinchas likes this.
  19. Look man no offense, I wasn’t even talking about you in particular, but a lot of people here do say things like “I reverted to my old behaviors” or “I became moody and uncooperative” after they remove the cage. And in this case my point stands, a piece of metal cant be the reason why you act the way you act, otherwise it is just fabricated, instead of genuine.

    Now, in your situation it is perfectly understandable when you said “I'm not motivated to do things for my wife the way I was and the idea of going a really long time before cumming again fills me with resentment”. When playing with enforced chastity and FLR you have to be really careful, things can easily go too far and create unhealthy imbalances in the relationship. If this happens it’s only natural to feel resentment, because chastity and FLR are designed to flip off the two essential components in a “normal” relationship:
    - Reciprocity: one party is expected to do all the work and provide all the pleasure, while the other is expected to just receive and never give back.
    - Autonomy: one party is expected to lose basic autonomy over his body, and be controlled by a partner without any expectation of reciprocity.

    To me these are the main reasons why chastity will always be just a roleplay for me, and nothing more. I could never make it a “normal” component in my relationships because I know for a fact that losing autonomy and not having reciprocity WILL make me resentful of my partner. You can rationalize it the way you want, but a relationship without these two IS objectively unhealthy. So if you want to go there you have to be 100% sure, otherwise it will lead to these bad feelings.
  20. So I made it, I'm quite proud of myself. I went 1 whole week without a cage, on the road, in a hotel room, access to the internet and did not have a single orgasm. Last time I was in this position I had 3 orgasms in 2 days from masturbation. I got home yesterday afternoon and went out for dinner with my wife and kids. After bedtime routines the kids went to sleep and my wife and I watched a TV show while I rubbed her feet and legs. I was out of my mind horny. Historically some of the best sex we have had has always been post trip reunion sex. After the show we went upstairs and got into bed and started fooling around. After about 5 minutes of foreplay she said "go get my toy". After retrieving the magic wand and bringing it to her she told me "you don't get to f**k me and you don't get to cum, now get to work pleasing me". It was a wild multi-orgasmic experience for her and a highly frustrating and arousing one for me. She left me unlocked and told me to go to sleep. I kept hoping she was going to roll over and get on top of me, but that never happened. This morning after I brought her coffee in bed she began stroking me and teasing me and then said, "time to lock up". I've never been a leaker, but I can't stop dripping. Love that woman.
  21. Awesome posts @PouchPantyLover@PouchPantyLover. I relate to a lot of that. A lot of folks seem to get confused when locked guys talk about changes in demeanor when locked vs unlocked. As if we become two different people. You, like me, seem like a loving, attentive partner. But what comes over a person after a good amount of time in the cage can’t be duplicated without it. That’s the whole point. That’s what the KHs love about it. But that doesn’t mean that when that extra attentiveness fades we turn into total A-Holes. Not sure why that is so difficult to understand.

    And kudos going the week without letting one fly. I was never a frequent masturbator, but especially after being caged, there’s no chance I’d be good for a whole week alone. If She’s around its easier - She tends to make sure I’m drained by her own hand if I have to be uncaged, so I don’t have the desire to do so myself. As a result, other than two instances in which I cheated, once uncaged, once caged, I haven’t masturbated in two years. Crazy to think about.
    PouchPantyLover and Jasmic68 like this.