So @jb123 and I were having a deep convo tonight .... and we were talking about how this next generation will not understand what wedding vows or true love is .... some will (I pray) .... but there no true commitment to a relationship..... my generation (millennial) do the same thing .... it’s sad to me .... reason I brought it up .... is because this year my and jb’s vow have been tested and I think we are doing a really job ......
True love still exists. But like anything worthwhile it doesn’t necessarily come easy. The basic rules which have applied forever still do. One needs to be selfless, open and willing to work through the hard times.
Amen to that ...... that’s the problem they don’t want to work at it .... they want it handed to them
I recently read an article that said millinnials are waiting longer to settle down and that there is a lower divorce rate trend starting because of it. Time will tell but I don’t think it will be any worse than the baby boomer generation, by far the highest divorce rate shown. And they are divorcing in their 60’s and 70’s which was never really happening before. According to the article.. I am not quite to five years married so I can’t really say from my wise long marriage. Though, for some reason she keeps putting up with me! My parents were married for 50 years before my mom passed away so I did have good role models.
Coming from parents married 50+ and having no divorce in my family I agree that good role models are a factor but my wife’s family is just the opposite and she’s seen all the problems caused from divorce and that’s her motivating factor to work hard on our marriage. I guess no matter what your background is if both have love and respect for each other than all else is secondary
wedding vows and true love are different things. Longevity of relationships is no indicator of true love. There are a lot of deeply unhappy marriages out there. True love will always exist because it's uncontrollable. It hits you like a train and you can't do anything about it.
While it is true that wedding vows and true love are different and there are many unhappy marriages that stay together it is also true that true love does hit you like a freight train (at least it did for me) but to turn that true love into longevity your wedding vows are a must (or whatever vows you live by). I would love everyday to be a hand in hand walk on the beach as the sun is setting but life’s realities dictate otherwise. Kids, health, bills and all the other ‘small things’ in life we sweat cause us ( and by us I mean my wife and I) to fall back on our vows on a regular basis whether we realize it or not. The flames may not be as high as they were when we were teenagers but the coals are hot and deep!
My grandparents were the perfect example of this. They were the reason I believe in divorce. 60+ years together and they had so much hate and abuse. The barely saw the other as a real person. They were of the generation where you did not get divorced. I would have much rather they did, been happy with their own lives, than the mean soulless abusive broken people they turned each other into. I will truly and in good-faith work on my marriage, provided my safety is not in jeopardy. Society has not done a good job showing people how to work on a marriage. How to compromise. How one side is not always the winner. How some arguments will never be won nor should "win" or "lose" be a concept during a disagreement. Puppy love, that honeymoon rose colored glasses phase, will fade. Real love, true love, comes from what those two people do after that newness dulls and true understanding, communication, empathy, togetherness blossoms.