Too much fantasy

So very true

 

By that standard, you should just get off the internet entirely. Don't let the door hit you on the way out.

 

The issue if sepating fantasy from reality is, as some wise posters said here, an all over the net issue. I enjoy a good erotic fiction piece but am mainly here for the real stuff and to share as I grow in my journey with M.
There are a lot of friendly welcoming people here and they have made it easier to post about real life problems I need help with like ring size issues and chafe and ball creep.

I know it may upset some to see posers posting obviously bogus stories. For me, it is disappointing if not labeled as fiction. However, life is short and I dont want to use my time on CM freting about that. I also hope that the good and helpful people here don't throw the baby out with the bath water.

I have only recently (relative to life) began my chastity journey with my new partner (my Mistress) and was one of those guys who fantasized about being locked and controlled by a strong woman for years. Well now I have one and we have both been through enough of what we dont want in life that we are very honest with each other. We took this step together and I have to say it has been an incredible journey. All is not like it was in my head where it was all sexy and sizzling 24-7. Yet it is gratifying and wonderful.

We have some wild encounters and they involve a lot of living out fantasy and exploring new realities. They make for sizzling hot writing. M requires me to keep a log of our encounters, my infractions and punishments. It includes my rules for everyday life and for our play time (collar rules). It also, very importly, includes mistress promises which I read often when I feel anxious or uncertain. Last Saturday's play time yielded a 5300 word essay. I'm now reluctant to share that for fear of being attacked as a poser. It Is a rare wild night we had between two oceans of vanilla day to day activities.

Yes, a lot of our FLR Chastity DD relationship is vanilla because there is a home, kids, work, hobbies, etc that take up most of the time we have. However, our little rendezvous are hot hot hot.

This lifestyle has been nothing short of incredible for both of us. We both found something we want and it is built on a foundation of deep love and mutual respect for each other. It is an ongoing journey and one that has had its speed bumps.

I am still working through the process of getting my ideal cage for my personal issues which are unique but I will get there. In the meantime, we take it on and off as needed but the removal of my cage is not the removal of my chastity and no touch rules. I honor the rules because they are our agreement and I know from decades of waiting how rare it is to find a woman that really wants to take the time to lead a man like this. Its hard work and I am very fortunate and fully committed.

So in between the laundry, sweeping, child care runs, school sports, grocery shopping, work, cleaning up dog poop and all that other vanilla stuff, we still enjoy play time and M and I keep the fires going with little text messages and innuendos throughout the day. During that 2.5 minutes where the kiddos are not jumping on the bed in the master bedroom, we have some edging and play. A few passionate kisses and talk. She enjoys getting me worked up and saying goodnight.

I absolutely love it and while it takes work it is worth it. What makes this arrangement for me is how much I love my partner. I've never loved this deeply or fully in my life. This special relationship is a gift and this site is helping me work through some of the real world challenges I face. Thank you all who take the time to post not only your real day to day issues but your special play time (that more erotic hot stuff you get to do) . It has given me ideas and opened my mind to possibilities.

Finally, thank you to Lucy and the many folks who manage CM and keep it going for the enjoyment and benefit of the community. Let's focus on how fortunate we are to have CM and come together as a community. Posers that are ignored will go away if they dont get attention.

 

We have been in a female led marriage since early 2013. Why? Because it works for us. True, I am locked up, but have chances for weekly releases and pretty much guaranteed a real orgasm once a month. We do practice PIV sex, just sometimes I have a lot of numbing cream and a couple of condoms to keep me going long and hard. We have never considered a 24/7 total lock-up as even a remote possibility. We enjoy each other too much. That said, I am completely devoted to my queen, have been sissified to her satisfaction and I adore and worship her because she is fulfilling her life as well as mine. I haven't tried my hand at fictional posts, but will let you know if and when.

 

The very subject of chastity doesn't seem very extreme, so is there really much scope for extreme BS? Or are you suggesting that those merely stating they've been locked for a while longer than you are liars?

I can't say I've seem much here that I've questioned, other than wondering how true it is that some people have been permanently locked for years. Having said that, I've just completed a personal best of 14 days and it does get quite intense (seriously thinking of doing Locktober) and I can see how others could get addicted enough to go full time.

I would say that there is one regular poster who I do believe is a fantasist as their posts are just plain weird sometimes, but other than that. Maybe I've just not read enough of the forums to have encountered any. Can you provide links to examples?

 

The photoshopped pictures are hilarious... The best response I have gotten to calling out someone's avatar or picture for this was...

"Well that clearly isn't a picture of you either, I guess you are fake too"

 

What scope for fakery is there on a site about chastity? I'm now intrigued. Can you provide a link to an example on here?

 

Talk to LUCY about it lol

 

I'l take that as a "no" to my question then re. providing a link to an example, lol.

 

I can provide a link if you private message me.

 

If you're sending me a link, shouldn't you me messaging me? What's the purpose of me messaging you?!?

 

I'll take that as "your not really that interested".

 

If people want to indulge in fantasy or embellish their part let them, so long as no one gets hurt or they promote anything that could hurt someone, what’s the problem.

I guess I’m less bothered than most lol

 

Not everyone appreciates the dishonesty. And sometimes for good reason.

For example, based on someone's post you might see some commonality of experience and initiate a chat. But only after a while private chatting does it become apparent that ts all fantasy on their part and they've just wasted your time trying to exchange honest views/experiences/tips/issues surrounding their supposed experiences.

I don't mind chatting to wannabees and give advice on things I do and that they want to do. So that's a different scenario to someone pretending their something their not and just using you reciting your own experiences so that they can get off on it.

Admittedly its sad that these people do not have the courage to live their lives as they genuinely want. But that's no excuse to mislead others and waste their time.

 

True I guess I see what you mean and that dishonesty. I think from my part I never truly believe everything I see or hear on here or any other social media

 

Interesting thread but IMHO much ado about nothing. There is no right or wrong way to do chastity. For some chastity is 30 minutes of being locked up during foreplay. For others it is years between orgasms. Some are self locked, some have an internet app like EMLA, some have a wife or girlfriend or boyfriend as a KH.

I didn't even know male chastity was a thing until I was 40 something. When I was 18 I don't think I could have been locked up for more than a few hours. 40 years later my sex drive is only a fraction of what it used to be so Locktober is fairly easy for me to endure.

I don't understand how pictures detect BS. I'm a shy boy. I don't even have an avatar. And I definitely won't be posting Gallery pictures.

Just my 2 cents worth!

 

This is why I get so uppity about unqualified people purporting to know about medical issues. (To be differentiated from people with actual training and experience making well-qualified statements here.) Medical posers want most of the authority and deference of the white lab coat and stethoscope without earning them, a form of dishonesty that could do damage to some unknown person's health. They often couch their comments as "just my experience," and "my doctor told me the truth and here it is." There is only one reason they are crossing the ethical line between a conversation with their doctor about their issue and a post to a community. Call it "social proof" or "internet points" or whatever, but it has huge potential for harm with a pretty pathetic payoff.

I believe that people should be honest and humble with health advice. Share an opinion as an opinion, link to an authoritative and reliable source, or go get a medical degree. And if you have a medical issue, talk to your doctor about it and ignore anything you read on the internet.

No, I'm not sending links. Look in my post history; examples of the topic should be pretty obvious.

 

But would you take medical or advice from someone you don’t know well or have never personally met on social media, certainly without investing more first?
Don’t get me wrong I agree with you and understand people should be honest and more open in safe places like this (well within reason :0)

I guess I’m just very distrustful of faceless people on social media. I don my best to be honest and don’t pretend to be an expert (certainly not in kink, I’m still learning lol)

 

Doesn't matter what I would do because that misses the point.

If someone posts medical advice, they don't get to shift all burden of NOT taking that advice to all readers. They retain the culpability of having spread the advice but are protected from that by on-line anonymity. In posting, they want the emotional boost of giving advice (the reason they post it in the first place) without taking any responsibility (cowering behind anonymity). If they had any interest in helping people, they would not post and take the risk that ONE person would make the mistake of believing them.

You don't have to look far to see the damage that anonymous claims about the world does, the confusion and misinformation and conspiracy nutcasery that has become the norm. I'm just saying that in the medical arena in particular, the line should be sharp and bright.

To repeat:
Share an opinion as an opinion, link to an authoritative and reliable source, or go get a medical degree.

 

I can’t believe I’ve missed this thread until now. It touches on some things I’ve been thinking about lately—mostly around another recent thread where the original poster was accused of posting a fantasy as reality. I didn’t want to add more to that argument, but I had an observation, really just a theory, that I’ll add here:

High protocol -> High bullshit probability

Consider: Every morning I get up at precisely 6:05 to draw Mistress’ bath water and lay out the pedicure implements while she clicks off demerits on her hand counter for my mid-morning punishment session. After her two hour bath and my punishment, it’s time for me to clean the house naked until my afternoon punishment. Then it’s lockup time for me until 5:00, when I’m let out for my evening punishment. Next I mix the cocktails for the nightly soirée, when Mistress’ friends all come over and fill every orifice in my body with whatever fluids they feel like. After a 7 gallon enema and my nighttime punishment, I’m tethered to the foot of Mistress’ bed until 6:05 the next morning, when …

Versus: Most nights I cook the dinner and clean the kitchen, and then get the coffee made so it can be poured over ice the next morning. Sometimes if there aren’t too many dishes, and I’m tired, I skip doing them. But if I forget to have the coffee ready, or if there’s no ice in the morning, it makes her day worse — and neither of us wants that. So I try not to forget that but sometimes I do and when I do she says I’m a bad subbie.

Living the reality of the second story is exhausting all by itself. If my Wife and I tried to live out the first one, neither of us would be able to keep up. Not to mention all the real life things that have to be dealt with, both alone and together.

Maybe I’m just old, maybe I’m just lazy, but I just don’t think many people can keep that kind of thing up. It can be super hot and sexy to read or fantasize about, but to live that even for a few days would take so much commitment from both parties that it’s hard to imagine finding time to do things like, say, posting on a chastity forum. Not that there aren’t real people living that way (or trying to), but they are few and far between, and they’re probably way too busy to post here.

Just my two cents worth.

 

If it sounds too good to be true, it's too good to be true.
Life is exhausting, and chastity is just a thing that happens in life. There are friends, engagements, early nights, colds. COVID, sore muscles, sadness, deaths, and that is life.
The world is not 24/7 sex.
Besides, doing things naked gets to be boring. Being naked is boring. It's about respect and understanding one's place in the relationship if that is your thing. And there are vanilla people who come over and they sure as heck wouldn't be impressed to see all this erotic (to you) nonsense going on.
There is some tremendously good advice from some good people on forums, but yes you must be very careful and verify everything. i'm very thankful for this forum but i don't get into this fantasy nonsense.
Please don't take me as being angry, as i am not. For some, they aren't even in chastity, it's just a fantasy and nothing more. It's a hard life and i do my very best not to judge.
Apologies for those whom i may offend with this viewpoint. After all, it's just an opinion and the world is full of them.

 

Some things are hard to verify. After all, this is a forum, words written by people who might not 'exist' in real life.
On the other hand if two like-minded people meet, some fantasies can come true.
What I want to say is that if it sounds too good to be true, can be too good to be true. But it just might be real...
20 years ago I would have never imagined that it is possible to be locked for extended periods of time. Yet I survived 1 year. And now I'm going through something I still can't believe it is true...

 

I may have a flair for the dramatic and this account may be new but, everything I have written is true.

To me there is nothing more off-putting than an obviously fake story. Real accounts are far more enthralling than fantasy.

I intend to keep my writing captivating and evocative around the subjects that are discussed here. I desire to write more about my experiences, but won’t make up stories for the sake of internet points.

Jessica xXxX

 

I’ve seen this with blogs sometimes, too. I’ve seen a blog that I thought might be real suddenly veer off into penthouse forum storytelling, which is pretty disappointing.

Fiction is great for stimulation and ideas, but I find trying to pass it off as real either pathetically attention seeking or money grubbing (the latter in the case of blogs).

 

I wish everyone was like that. Sadly some are in a fantasy world and don’t do things for real. So those of us who have had some amazing fun are questioned as it can sound fake.

As I’ve said before, I only share when it’s relative to a discussion. But I’m glad you share when you feel you can.