The Refrigerator Man by dollyanne Refrigerator salesmen at Sears work on commission and Big George, as he was known by the staff there, was working hard to earn his by impressing my wife, Julie. He was a tall bulked-up glib black man in a forest-green polo knit shirt, and while he prattled on about icemakers, water filters, and energy savings, my red-haired wife smiled and made eye contact with him. He talked directly to her as if I wasnt there, and I suppose to some degree I wasnt, since I trailed meekly behind them as he led her smoothly from model to model. He seemed to know instinctively who the decision maker was. Oh, honey, look, she said, running over to a black Kenmore side-by-side. She stroked the door of the refrigerator like it was the back of a Persian cat and smiled up at George. I love black, its so beautiful! Thats our top-of-the-line model, he said. Energy-Star compliant, twenty-two cubic feet. He bent his six-four hulk down and opened the freezer door for her. It made a loud sucking sound. Thats the seals, he said as he opened the door. These babies are air tight. Airtight. HmmmI like that, Julie said. I like that a lot. You can fit a lot of meat in here too, he said gesturing to the freezer section. Seven point four cubic feet of freezer capacity, much bigger than average. I like big hunks of meat, she said, smiling up at him. Especially, bigger than average. George looked at her with a toothy grin. I wondered if he was an ex-football player from the size of him and the athletic way he moved. His large hands barely fit through the refrigerator handles and his build reminded me of one of the refrigeratorsbroad shoulders, thick thighs. He had a protruding paunch, though Im sure Julie didnt mind. She could probably tell that some big meat was dangling inside those pleated khaki pants to make up for it. I stared at the top of a romance novel he had shoved into his back pocket and tried to catch the title. It was something like, Hot Summer, Black something. The rest of the title was hidden and would be hard to read anyway the way he kept moving his big butt around. I hoped he didnt think I was staring at it. Honey, do you think this will fit in my tight space? Julie asked. I jerked my head around. What? Honey, pay attention. Can you measure it for us? George said it was bigger than average. Yes, of course, I said. It does look big. I meant the refrigerator, of course, but if she meant George, I was guessing at least 8 inches, which would be twice as big as me. I took out my Lufkin Ultra Lock tape measure from my pocket and got the width, length, and depth of the refrigerator. Looks plenty big, I said. Dont forget to add a couple of inches for the hoses in the back, George said. And also the handles sticking out in the front. Things do expand a little, once you get in there, you know. It looks snug but I think itll fitbarely, I said. Good, I do like a snug fit, Julie said, looking up at George and smiling. Otherwise, it just has such a sloppy look and feel to it. Dont you think so, Hon? Y-yes, I stammered, wondering if this was going where I thought it was going and whether I was going to end up buying condoms that evening. Julie bent over to slide out the plastic crisper tray on the bottom, presenting her own succulent bottom to us. Romance-novel-reader George flashed his big piano-key teeth as he took it all in. The lace tops of her thigh-highs displayed nicely beneath her short skirt, and her blue silk panties were a hair shy from being visible to the world. A tent was forming in Big Georges pants. Thats a clear humidity-controlled crisper for vegetables, he said. Giant vegetables, from the size of it, she said. I could get some nice long and thick cucumbers and squash in there. Big George just kept smiling, and the tent in his pants got bigger. Im sure that Julie could tell that he wasnt called Big George for nothing. Do you deliver? she asked from her bent over position. Of course, George said. We have a direct in-home delivery and installation service. Its all free of charge. She stood and faced him then touched him on his upper arm, giving his pumped bicep a little squeeze. No, I meant you personally, George, she said. Im concerned about the size of the space and whether the front door is too narrow. Can you come over and measure everything for me before we decide? Well, Im sure we can I mean, you might have to force it through the back door, she said. The front door could be a little tight. Then she added, You might want to try both though. You know, to see what works best. I could have sworn that I saw her wink at him. Youd be amazed at the small spaces Ive gotten into, he said. But, let me check my schedule. Were close by, Julie said with a smile. You could even swing in over your lunch hour if you want. I could fix you something. I spoke up. Hon, you know Ive got that appointment in town tomorrow. I cant Thats all right, dear. I can handle this. You dont need to be there, she said. You dont bite, do you George? George smiled. No, maam. Its settled then, Julie said. Youll be there for lunch tomorrow, George, to check out the front and back doors and to take measurements? Yes, maam, George said. I think I can make it. She gave him our address and her cell phone number to call in case there was any problem. Julie bent over again, this time a bit more, to slide the crisper door back in. She gave us a nice display of bare thigh above her hose tops and a flash of her baby blue panties. I think George was foaming at the mouth. Damn, this door is stuck, she said, trying to slide it back in. Here, let me. He bent over next to her with his bottom in the air too. Their heads were close together as they worked on the crisper tray. I thought I heard her whisper something to him, but I couldnt make it all out. Though the phrases wimp cuckold hubby and need a real man seemed to be in the air, but I wasnt sure. It was probably my active cuckold imagination. I was mesmerized by their two butts swaying rhythmically side by side. Thats when I noticed the romance paperback in his back pocket had slipped out about an inch. I was in shock when I saw the full title peeking out and staring me square in the face: Hot Summer, Black Heat, and White Housewives in the Suburbs. They stood up in unison and he looked directly at her, ignoring me. Dont worry about that drawer, he said. Our satisfaction is guaranteed. Im counting on it, she said. And we have unlimited service calls on covered items. All parts and labor included. I like the labor part, she said. As long as youre the one doing the labor. He laughed. Yes, maam. I always service my customers personally. And, if you buy from me, you get free preventive maintenance and performance checks at your request. Not just the annual checks that Sears offers. UmmmI might request those quite often, she said, smiling. Im sure that can be arranged, he said, with a big grin. He finally looked at me and extended his hand. Youre a lucky man, he said, to have such a beautiful wife. And were going to deliver her a great refrigerator. Shell be satisfied many times over. You wont regret it. I shook his hand, thinking that I was probably going to see a lot of Big George in the next few months. And hear him. And taste him. Many times over. She deserves the best, I said. And shell get it from me. You bet she will, he said. Julie took my arm. Thank you, Hon, youre so sweet. Be a good boy now and give George your credit card and thank him for all the great service hes going to give us. My face felt flush. Yes, maam, I said. Thank you, George. I handed him my Visa and looked down at the floor. He ran the card through and I signed the receipt. Its such a pleasure working with a couple like you. He extended his hand to me but smiled at Julie. He couldnt take her eyes off her. Yes, sir, I said, shaking his hand limply. He squeezed my hand in a vice grip. I hope its a frequent pleasure, Julie added. Big George leaned down and whispered in my ear while crushing my hand tighter. Trojans XL Magnum, he said. I nodded in pain. Yes, sir.