The Evolution of Mistress Amante

I had given mistress a foot rub and she was nice enough to return the favor. Afterward she said I had made a mess on her pants(the lotion), I then said I could make an even bigger mess if she was willing... “you wish!” Is what I heard in reply. Her look of are you nuts is still vivid in my mind. It was as if there wasn’t a reason in the world to let me cum...not one that would benefit her anyway.

On a side note, it seems she has grown more accustomed and proud of my role in the home lately. Regularly she fits it in the conversation with others that I do the cleaning and cooking. Out with her friends she said it, and lately on Facebook she replied to everyone “that’s ok, he does all the cleaning anyway” about having less hair in the house now that we have one less dog. She doesn’t exactly mention she’s in charge in the bedroom or what I wear when I’m cleaning but she is certainly not being shy about our roles in the home. I find I am having no small amount of pride that I am brag worthy.

Just the other day she texted that she missed me and that she “needed some Nikki attention”. Interesting to see where that goes, I am not used to dressing with her there, besides stretch running pants and tops anyway. The word Nikki made it sound as if she wanted a more feminine me present. Dressing in front of her is always a double edged sword. On one side I do feel a deep connection, a feeling of submissiveness like no other, and I get to let my guard down and just be me. On the other side, dressing in female attire is something I’ve always done alone and only once(was with her) had any sexual overtones while wearing those clothes. Now it feels somewhat sexualized when I’m around her. Before I would be alone, dress, watch tv and relax. Now I’m chaste, constantly arroused, and it’s new being that way while dressed feminine. I’m adjusting, and the more time around her this way, the better I feel.

 

Yesterday had me on cloud 9. I write sometimes how we text back and forth captioned pics and gifs...we most of the time it’s me texting her and her responding with words. Yesterday was different, not only did she initiate, but it was some pretty hot stuff.

I was at work and was dripping with anticipation for each new text from her. Upon arrival home she had made plans to make supper and after we watched some tv. She asked if i wanted to take a bath with her, of course, and it was a bit cramped, but so nice being next to her soapy body.

She was tired so, there was no further fun and we both got some much needed sleep. This morning surely got us back on track.

I went down and submerged myself in her. I wanted my entire face marked with her scent. I was ravenous for her and brought her very close. She usually doesn’t orgasm this way, but instead of using my fingers in her like usual I grabbed the 9inch dildo and harness and in no time I was looking down and gliding it into her.

I always try to go slow at first, it’s hard to judge resistance when you can’t feel, but it was secured pretty tightly right above my cage so could feel enough. Once I was certain of the ease of resistance, and I wasn’t pushing too deep or to fast, I increased the pace. She moaned with every deep thrust, she rolled her head back and spread her legs wider trying to get every bit of the 9 inches in her. I kept the same pace, which is hard to do when it lasts awhile. I hadn’t lasted more than 30 seconds in a long time.

I increased my pace and she increased her moaning. She then wrapped her legs around me as I was going fast and I quickened again. He had a nice orgasm and I reached over and grabbed the wand. Still slowly pumping the large cock in and out of her I handed her the wand. I went more upright so she could freely use the wand without me in the way, the cock was more than long enough to still reach. I didn’t wait too much longer before increasing the pace and depth of my thrusting, all while watching her large breasts shake with each thrust, and watching her face of pleasure and need. She had another O and I slid the attached member out of her and rested on her chest while we both caught our breath and told me how much she loved me, and how perfect I am.

As we caught our breath I figured she had one more left in her, and handed her the wand again and as she turned it up a few notches I slid a few fingers inside her. She worked the wand as I worked her g spot. So wet and so much room after the pounding I gave her with Johnson. I could hear the sound of her wetness and think she is close to becoming a squirter. She had one last O and could take no more.

I climbed above her, trying to get my cage in her, I can’t tell if I was or not, I felt warm but can’t tell if I was actually in her or just pressed tightly to her. She asked me what I was doing. I said trying to get in you. She said I suppose you’d like your cage off. I quickly said yes, but she didn’t say ok, and she didn’t say no, she just giggled a little...I guess that’s a no. I probably should know better by now, when I use the strapon with Johnson she has never let me uncage. Once she let me in her after but I wasn’t caged at the time. She couldn’t feel me at all so, probably no real incentive.

I sure hope I can please her again tonight, my mind is preoccupied with the thought of her next to me.

I do love her so

 

We had a little tiff the other night, nothing serious but I reacted like I normally do and feel terrible about it.

I have posted about it on my blog suddenlysubbie in more detail. She is a follower and gets notifications of when I post and does read them. She has said she has given up on checking up on me here, the new site layout, notifications, and disclaimer kinda scared her away. Not a big deal, she really only checked on my status anyway. My Wordpress blog is a bit different, it’s almost exclusively me venting to her(only have 9 followers) and I usually express feelings more there than here.

Anyway, I discussed that after our tiff and she yelled to “get back here right now!” and told me I was gonna get a paddling if I left, and I also discussed that I think I may need that kind of direction to keep me in line. More to the point, I may need that kind of discipline to keep me from ruining our relationship. I have a tendency to shut down and isolate myself. In fact when she yelled at me I was on my way upstairs to sleep on the couch.

No big deal right, every couple have arguments, well I happen to know where these end up going. I shut down, she stays mad, I never know when we are cool again, and I fall back into a funk. Things just go down hill from there, and I don’t want us to ever resent each other.

One thing I do love about domestic discipline, and trying to let her lead, is that you know when it’s over, and when it’s safe. I would prefer her to paddle me to tears and have it be over and done with, than walking around not knowing how to make it right or if it was.

So she has read my plea, we will see what her reaction will be, and if she is willing to take on that mantle. I do not do this without a certain amount of trepidation, when she decides to do something or has a plan, she is all or nothing. I am still willing to accept it, knowing it will prevent me from the self destructive crap I seem to always do that isolates us.

 

Friday I was unlocked for the weekend. We had her friend over for a few drinks and I got a bit sassy. Bedtime rolled around and she said I owed some paddling.

I laughed it off but she said to strip bend over the bed. I did and she gave me a very hard swat with a wooden paddle (the one with holes). I was fairly shocked with how hard and began to laugh. I don’t know why but I laugh when I get paddled. She kept it up very hard, enough where I tried to sit to escape her swats. She asked if I was done laughing now, I said yes, and she gave me the rest.

We went to bed and snuggled and I thanked her. She grabbed my cock which was not hard at all and asked if I was tired. I said I’m not too tired for that! She gave it some more attention with her hand and it grew. Yay!! Had been a bit worried, I hadn’t been getting erections since I unlocked. She didn’t want the wand or for me to go down on her she just told me she wanted me to fuck her.

She got on top of me and I slid in. She rode me, mostly grinding hard until she came. She told me I could cum but I could tell it wasn’t going to happen. Maybe it was the drinks, or maybe some of my hormone issues, but I knew I wasn’t even close so she said,”well I guess you don’t need to cum then” and rolled off me. We went to sleep in each other’s arms.

The next night she wanted the wand and I handed it to her. Still uncaged I tried to put myself in her while she used the wand, but couldn’t reach. So close but so far away, I watched her cum while my cock was touching her her outer lips. She then removed the wand and let me in her with me on top. It felt amazing and I knew whatever issues I had the night before were gone, I was already on the cusp of cumming. She told me to fuck her hard, I did my best, and said I couldn’t hold out much longer, and was instructed to cum. I did, a lot! It seemed to last forever and almost hurt. She didn’t have me clean up this time, and we both fell asleep.

The next morning she told me she should have had me clean up last night, she was leaking cum all night and finally had to go to the bathroom, she slept in a wet spot and said I won’t be getting out of that again!

I had remained uncaged, she never told me to lock up so I didn’t. Then she put the cage from her side of the bed to mine. I still didn’t lock up. This morning she said “you still haven’t locked up, I put your cage where you would see it” I said “well you didn’t tell me”, she said “oh I need to tell you? Ok, put your cage on” and we both kinda laughed. While she was getting ready for work I put the cage on and left the key pendant on her phone. She clipped it on her necklace and kissed me before heading out the door for work.

What a weird happy life we live.

 

After almost 4 weeks of lock up, she thought it was time to play last night.

Unfortunately as I was afraid of, being unlocked did not return erection. Had noticed I wasn’t getting hard in the morning (attempted), or during the day. I had hoped that being out and played with would do the trick, it didn’t.

She played with it, lubed it up, stroked and rubbed, finally got it chubby enough to attempt insertion, but wasn’t hard enough for her to grind on it like she usually does to get off.

Stayed unlocked this morning, and after she left for work did a little experimenting. I told her about it so no one have a fit! I played with it myself to see if I could get hard. It did not. I kept on getting close to cumming and stopped, still without erection. Weird feeling, being so horny,turned on, and on the brink or orgasm, without even being hard.

I texted her about my efforts and the results. She was supportive, I told her we still have Johnson (our strapon) and she was anxious to get my stunt cock to work...maybe tonight! I’m also a little anxious to find out what an orgasm feels like when your not hard...that is if she decides to give me one. Good news, I can wear the strapon cage free without worrying about poking her with anything lol!

 

Spent an hour watching some porn and working on it, managed to get hard...so I just needed some fore play and time lol

 

Disclaimer...this is a graphic description of events.

It had been a few weeks or so, and due to certain circumstances we had not even been intimate for quite awhile (rashes, monthly’s, schedules, kid, work, and just plain tired) and that night was about to be just another one of those nights as we went to bed both a bit tipsy late in the evening.

She casually tapped my cage and asked me how the little guy was doing, I said stuck, and she said good she liked it that way. I immediately plumped up in my cage which she noticed and mentioned she could really use doxi.

For reference “doxi” and “Johnson” are the toys we usually go to, high powered wand and the 9inch dildo.

I handed her doxi and caressed her thighs while she worked the wand. That’s when the dirty talking started that drives me out of my mind. She starts with how much she isn’t going to let me cum, how I’ve not been serving her as I should and my tiny cock doesn’t deserve to be out. That I’m going to be cleaning the house naked, going down on her any time “I fucking feel like it”, and aren’t going to cum in a long time. She continues to work the wand on herself while I start to finger her. She is getting closer and asks me to get Johnson, she needed a big cock.

I quickly grabbed the harness with Johnson attached and knelt above her as I entered missionary. This position is not one I am often in unless using Johnson. I slowly entered her and heard her moan as the first 5 inches slid in. Once I had a few strokes in at that depth and I felt her grabbing me and pulled me in closer, I pushed in the other 4 inches and her guttural moan was right in my ear.

I was giving her a good fucking and more dirty talk ensued:
A: oh my god I needed this, I need a big cock like this, don’t i deserve a big cock like this?
N: uh huh
A: you wish you could fuck me like this don’t you, I wish you could too, I would let you fuck me every day. You can’t fuck me like this with your tiny little dick
N: no I can’t
A: I want a real cock, not Johnson, a real cock that fills me up like this, I want to fuck a real cock, will you get me a real cock
N: uh huh
A: you’ll what?
N: find you a real cock
A: what will you do if I find a real cock
N. Anything you want
A: will you lick my clit while he fucks me
N: uh huh
A: will you suck his cock
N: anything you want
A: will you suck his cock
N: yes
A: will you clean me when he’s done, will eat all his cum out of me
N: yes
A: that will be your job, your my little bitch and you’ll clean out my pussy, you won’t get to cum in me, I’ll keep you locked in your cage forever
N: ok
A: I might let you fuck me with your tiny little dick but you won’t cum

All this while I was fucking her hard and deep with Johnson. She came and said she wanted to feel my little cock in her while she came again with doxi. She unlocked me and I slid back into her, but with me this time. The feeling was amazing, warm wet and it totally enveloped me, and I could feel that Johnson had been their earlier. She let me pump for awhile and used doxi on her clit. I lasted about a minute and told her I had to stop or was going to cum. She rolled me off her and continued with doxi and as I was laying there trying not to cum, 20 seconds later it started to flow out. I rolled back on her and slid in her, cum still on my cock from the ruined orgasm and fucked her while she worked the wand until she came again. She said I will let you cum if you can do it quickly. Between the ruined and the drinking, I was still rock hard but knew orgasm wasn’t going to happen. I gave it a try since it felt so good but after a minute she said time was up “time to put that little thing back in its cage”.

I went to the bathroom and noticed a few abrasions from the bars of my cage(I think from rubbing on dried cum stuck to cage), so stayed unlocked for the night, but was told to lock back up as soon as I healed.

So....what a night. Probably the hottest sex we’ve had, and I didn’t even get to cum. I was in some sort of subspace. When she was talking like that I would have done anything, agreed to anything, I wasn’t even thinking. In fact I had to wait a few days to get it all straight in my mind because I was so zoned out before I could write it all down. I know I missed some of the things she said because I can’t remember exactly when she said them so left them out of the narrative, but she mentioned stuff about always eating my cum and not getting out of it, paddling my ass until she is soaking wet, etc. it was just so crazy and hot that I can’t get it all straight and I was so lost in her I don’t remember the order she said it.

So I caged up later and still horny as all get out, loving her more every day.

 

Went to a party last night, later that evening one of her friends arrived that just happens to be the only person she told about my device.

She doesn’t really hang out any more and the subject was never brought up again, but last night her friend practically dug in her cleavage to fish out her pendant so she could look at it. It’s not the same one she saw before (that was a mature metal wrench type), it’s the key pendant I made.

Knowing everyone was drinking and lips might get loose, I quickly interrupted and asked about her foofoo drink and whether they were good. She dropped the pendant and engaged in my conversation without discussing the key or asking if she still has me locked.

Whew!!!

 

They could change, but she would never do anything without consulting me, and the last time she discussed things like this in such detail I inquired and she said she would never, she just thinks it’s hot. So for now it is it’s dirty talk.

 

I keep learning more and more about her. Her barricades and defenses down, she opened up some more.

We spent the afternoon out and came home with a little buzz, and had been on vacation at my folks for a week. She was feeling frisky so broke out a truth or dare game she had bought well over a year ago. We kept to mostly truth questions because most of the dares involved action that warranted way more time than we wanted to stay up(massage for hour, oral for hour), and some had positions that are just impossible for me to do. In the truth portion I discovered that some activities turned her on very much. I learned:

1. When asked what activity turns her on the most I was surprised. I thought it would be the spankings, she is always super wet and eager after she does them. But it wasn’t. She said she loved when I was her maid the most. A very big surprise on my end. Although it was her idea at first, I had thought that she enjoyed it only for my attentive behavior and frankly to have everything done for her. I had no idea she thought it was the hottest thing we have done. Especially since we rarely do anything sexual (with me) when I’m the maid.

2. Hotwife cuckolding whatever you want to call it is something that is far more on the table than I had assumed. Her hottest fantasy is me watching and participating while she is with a young hung dominant guy. She had mentioned it many times during sex, but when asked it was just dirty talk. Now the truth is she does want to, but is too nervous about the realities that go with multiple partners...disease, someone finding out, and logistics of actually finding the perfect person for it. I am neither for or against, merely wanting her to be as happy as I am, and receive anything she desires without worrying about my ego or love being crushed.

3. This Question came next. “What haven’t you done but you would like to do?” She mentioned the above scenario but added she would like to see me go down on the guy or have us both do it together. This is somewhat new information. During dirty talk while pleasuring her she has asked if I would do that for her. Again I assumed it was part and parcel to testing my state of being. To see how desperate I was , and get me to admit the limits I was willing to cross for her. I had not imagined the reality of it actually turned her on, or that it’s something she wanted to experience seeing firsthand. Later that night when I was pleasuring her she asked me several times if I would. So have learned it’s not something she is just testing me on or fishing if it’s something I wanted to hear.

It seems no matter how open and honest we are with each other, their are always new barriers that can be discovered and torn down. I truly love her more and more, and so great full she allowed me even further into her labyrinth.

 

Our big day went great, stayed locked throughout the weeks leading up to our wedding night...plus one more night. We were both tired, and told me she would unlock me in the morning.

She did, and it was nothing out of the ordinary, mouth, fingers, toys, then me. Was three weeks so I didn’t last long, but that’s not different either.

I did manage to get a little of our dynamic in my vows...
I promise to love, honor, serve, and respect you. I will calm you when you’re crazy, protect you when you’re vulnerable, and to treat you as special as you truly are. You hold the key to my heart, you make me happy, and I am yours forever.

 

Yesterday was my return to maid service. All went better than expected. It amazes me how much I can enjoy something, or get a sexual charge out of something, just by knowing I am making her happy.

My morning started getting up with her, making her coffee, and seeing her off to work. Then I got ready. Ok, I have gained a few pounds this summer. I wasn’t going to be happy with me in a cotton dress that would cling to my fat, I tried a corset, but that was crazy painful. Bottom ribs in the back were poking me, and after a few hours I had to remove it. Moving on, my dresses are pretty much all the same style, cut, and fabric, just different colors. So I thought lets go big and go pink. I didn’t wear stockings, it’s summer, and I don’t mind showing off my tanned legs lol. I put on my new white and black open toed flats and was ready to start my shift.

I started with basic clean up, laundry, clutter put away, and then I noticed the bedroom. She wanted to rearrange our bedroom for awhile, but its a pain in the butt and we never got around to it. So I figured lets get started. Moving around the large furniture in a small room is quite the task, I cleaned as I moved things. We have dogs, so hair and dust seems to find its way everywhere. I put new sheets on and washed the bedding. Then came the sex toys and accessories. We have quite a collection, and punishment implements have grown equally as well…why I keep buying them for her is beyond me lol. I wanted to keep them handy, but not super out in the open. I cleaned out an end table with doors, two wooden paddles went in there. Two leather strap paddles hung on the back of the closet door, which is only seen if the door is closed which it never really is. A bamboo cluster and a diabolical wooden oar/paddle is in the corner only visible if the closet door is closed. There are restraints under the bed that hide themselves, but we also have some rope, I wrapped them around each bedpost and it looks like the natural rustic look of the wooden frame. Then came my side. My two drawer side table has misc toys in the bottom, ones we rarely use such as nipple and clit suction cups, huge dildo, the two dildos that attach to the sex machine, and some scarves. The top drawer hides the doxi wand, 9 inch dildo and harness, 7 inch dildo, 2 butt plugs, and rubber gloves(in case she ever wants to milk my prostate). Lube is out in the open and easy to reach on top of the dresser. The only thing someone can see is my collar and leash that i put out and the sex machine that is on the floor in a spot out of the way. I cleaned off her dressers, added a new lamp, and washed the mirrors so she can actually see herself. By the way, one of the mirrors is next to the bed, looking forward to the show if i take her with the 9inch strapon from behind.

That took alot longer than i had thought it would, and i was really behind. Although during a smoke break outside i noticed my leg was wet. I lifted up the dress and saw that i was leaking. The undies i wore were a bit lacy in that area and didn’t absorb anything, it just dripped right through down my leg. After finishing a task i was physically arroused. I went in and looked at myself in the full length mirror, and although i am no beauty queen, i certainly wasn’t ugly. I’ve been shaving my legs for well over a year and were nicely tanned due to my time in the sun, I’m pretty much hairless everywhere else as well, and although i have put on a few pounds, the dress hid it nicely. My shoulders are a bit too big to be feminine, but my chest is still fairly androdgynous as is my face. All in all not horrible which really helps not feeling ridiculous.

Back to work, i vaccumed, swept, cleaned the bathtub, and started supper. My beautiful wife woke up sick, and knew that she would appreciate some soup, so i made some homemade turkey and bean soup. I swept, changed the laundry out again, and again i noticed my leg was wet. With every task complete, i noticed it. God i wanted to take the cage off, to let it get hard, to feel the pleasure that comes with it being touched. Encased in its steel, there will be no erection, no feeling, no touching. I went to take a smoke break and noticed i was out and wanted to go get some before she arrived from work so i could greet her. I hurried downstairs to change out of my dress, but i was too late, she arrived and i didn’t get to greet her at the door like i had wanted. I told her “you missed the maid, i just changed i need to run to the store” she said that was ok, she needed to go too. We went and returned.

She seemed to love the new arrangment of the bedroom, and i felt so proud…more leaking. I served her soup, we watched tv and relaxed on the couch for awhile. When she was done doing stuff on her computer i told her i would run her bath. I washed and bathed her, scrubbing her back and massaging her shoulders. I washed her hair and massaged her head. In the bath i was soaping and rubbing her feet and i was torn. I desperately wanted to take them in my mouth, to show her how much i wanted to be hers, but i held off, this was for her and not me. I left her to relax in the hot bath with candles burning, my legs now wet from the more constant dripping. After her bath i had set up her massage table along with everything i might need. I asked her if she was in the mood for a massage or if she just wanted to veg out. She said she didn’t want to make me work, but i assured her it was nothing. She layed down on the table and i began.

Massages are my biggest test. Touching her and rubbing her with oil, seeing her just lying there and open and relaxed makes me want to be selfish, to ask for the key, to slide myself in her and feel her luxurious pussy or even just jack my cock off on her while looking at her…but again, it’s not about me today, so i kept it about her. I always start off with a normal massage. Trying to make her feel relaxed, and rubbing in ways that will feel good on your muscles etc., but after that is done, i turn it sexual and test if she would like a happy ending. After rubbing her inner thighs and rubbing her hairless pubic mound with oil i could feel the heat radiating from her. She may be under the weather but she was also turned on. I got the doxi wand out and used it on her legs and thighs before getting to her mound. She was escalating quickly so i backed off a bit. I used my fingers in her for a minute and with doxi i knew it wouldn’t take long so i removed my fingers and thought i would try something new. We have a stainless steel plug that is quite wide, I slowly inserted it in her. It was cold on her at first but soon found its place buried in her. I was jealous. At 3 inches, it is about the same size as me, and there it was buried somewhere i desparately wanted to be. I continued using doxi on her, on her clit and on the plug hoping the vibrations would make it through to the inside. She was not going to take long, and i noticed the plug was starting to be devoured by her, it was dissappearing. I did not want to ruin the moment, but was worried that fishing it out later may not be very fun, so decided plug time was over. I told her to relax and i grabbed the base of the bulbous toy and slowly removed it. I wasn’t out of toys though and grabbed the 9 inch dildo. I slowly inserted the tip inside of her and was waiting for her to adjust to its size. One thing i never tire of is seeing a large cock dissappear inside of her. It was hard to work the wand and the dildo at the same time, and sensing this she took the wand so i could work the cock inside her. Although i have seen that same cock dissappear in her, seen her fuck herself with that cock by rapidly jamming it in her, i never got the chance to do it for her. She had doxi wand on her clit and i had only worked in half of it before she had cum. With a light sheen of oil on her, she looked like a queen lying on that table, and i was so happy i could give her pleasure.

I moved the table, and we watched tv again and relaxed a bit before going to bed. We went to our room, clean from my efforts, and she told me how nice it looked again. We layed next to each other and she thanked me, and told me how special she felt, and i couldn’t have been more proud and more turned on for the serving her.

The next morning we woke up and she had to get up to get ready. She took a minute to rub me through the cage and said “I have my doting devoted boyfriend back”(we’re married but she still says boyfriend lol). I got up with her, dressed in some capris and a cute tank, made her coffee, and started dishes, and finished the last load of laundry. She asked if i was working again… I said only a half day(my son will be home this afternoon) and we both smiled. I showed her the lunch i packed for her and she said it will be fine.

I can’t believe how i have responded to maid service. I really had no intesion of maid service. It was a hard limit, i actually said “i don’t want to be some maid doing chores and running around looking silly”. It’s not like that though. I choose what chores i do, i choose what i wear and it isn’t anything over the top, and i am not in any trouble if something isn’t done. No pressure, and the stuff i do is appreciated. I regret not being dressed for her when she got home and greeting her at the door, but i did need to leave the house. I have come to realize how much i enjoy, and need to be dressed femininly around her, to be accepted and comfortable around someone.

As far as chastity is concerned, we made love the day after we wed, a week later when we returned from vacation, and have remained caged since. One night i really wanted her after going down on her, licking her feet, and devouring her ass. She had already came, and she said maybe next time. I really wanted to cum, but the next day i thanked her for knowing whats best for us and being in control.

I love our life, i love her, i am so grateful to have someone that loves me enough to take charge, to know when i should cum and when i shouldn’t, to punish me when i need it, and is about the sexiest and sweetest person i’ve ever met.





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I think sometimes we (men locked by their wives) forget that they aren’t in the same zone we are in. I know I sometimes do. That’s why every act of affection, every acknowledgement of my state of being, every dirty text, pic, meme, or casual touch means so very much.

Am I a better partner when I am denied erections and orgasms? Probably, but it’s not easy, and it’s always on my mind…always, like I’m thinking of her every second of the day. We sometimes take for granted that they are not thinking about it as much as we are. That is why I am so grateful.

I usually spend a lot of time searching the Internet for pics and memes that describe what I’m thinking or feeling, So anytime she returns these, or mentions something, lightly touches my cage, or informs me of activities she wants to do, it lets me know she hasn’t forgotten I’m locked up, or how much I need her. So for that I am grateful.

It boggles the mind how much my brain goes in different directions. I crave so much but don’t even know what I want:

• I want to cum
• I don’t want lose this subbiespace I’m in
• I want out of my cage to get hard
• I want to stay in to push my limits
• I want to show the world how devoted I am to her
• I don’t want to reveal anything that would embarrass her
• I want her to punish me extremely hard to exert her power over me and push me into complete servitude
• Getting to that is difficult
• I want to cum all over her pussy, breasts, feet, asshole, legs and exert her will over me and to dominate me by ordering me to clean it up
• I don’t want to reset the clock by cumming and it’s not something I can do without her making me even though doing it for her excites me

• Etc etc etc

• My world is awash in conflicting desires so I guess it makes sense I don’t get to decide. I’m just glad she listens to and acknowledges my state of mind even when I know hers isn’t preoccupied with it as mine is.

 

Warning...graphic description of sex.

Thought I would share some details of a very wonderful experience. I haven’t been sharing much about them lately, but as I counted them out recently, I only had 10 orgasms so far this year, so I better not miss the opportunity to revel in it.

We went and visited a few of her friends and had some drinks, then we went home and some other friends of hers visited the house. After a few drinks I had to call it a night, I work early in the morning. She wanted to go to the local bar a block away with the work friends and left. I woke when she crawled in and in her tipsy state began rubbing my cage.

I was dead tired, a little drunk, and half asleep, but it’s been 21 days since I was uncaged or had an erection so I was game for whatever she wanted. She sat on my face, which woke me up considerably, then slid down and had me finger her while I licked her clit. She needed a bit more so asked me to get the doxi wand. I was fingering her and watching as she grinned the powerful wand into herself and she started talking.

She asked me if I wanted out of my cage, she asked me if I wanted to cum, she asked me if I thought I could make her cum with my little dick. Yes yes and maybe. She said if I let you out and you don’t make me cum with your little dick I may never let you try again. I don’t remember what exactly I said but had agreed. She then told me I have to lock back up right away. I agreed. As soon as the cage was removed I was instantly hard and positioned myself above her. Usually she needs to be on top, that way she can grind herself on me and can feel me. But I was so ready to cum I just wanted to slide in her all the way as deep as I could and feel her sex around me.

I started to slide back and forth, trying to push to the other side of her, as deep as I could go, it felt wonderful. She told me that she didn’t think I was going to make her cum, she could hardly feel me. That I was going to be locked back up for a long time, and that if I cum, I had better get down there and clean it up. She then asked me what I was going to do if I came, I told her. She call me her little dicked cumm after and I lost it. I filled her up, it was glorious and painful and I shuddered and curled into a spring. I was sensitive everywhere and I was flooded with ecstasy.

She then pushed my head down, hands in hair and told me to lick it all up. I instantly obeyed. I surely wasn’t looking forward to the deal brokered but as soon as she spoke I was back in subspace. Instead of being yucky, it was a treat of serving her.

I really did have to get to sleep so I did, but as I recount it all I have been getting hard, and just told her about it and she said...I guess you’ll have to get it back on ASAP. Love that woman, she sure knows which buttons to push.

 

Was hanging out with her relatives, and they were teasing me about how I had better run, talking about marrying into her family. She said “oh no, I got him locked up tight”. I think no she thought I missed it and looked at me closer and said “he is locked up, I don’t have to worry, he’s not going anywhere.”

I smiled and we all laughed, both of us grinning about something else.

 

Had an eventful evening last week...self pleasure!

We went to bed and she said she wanted to get fucked, she wanted to cum, and asked if I could do that. I hee hawed a bit and said well probably not, so she said “then use the other, I want to get fucked hard”. It’s a brand new harness, and one that I can stay caged and wear comfortably, I had it all adjusted and ready, but I hadn’t tried to get the dildo attached yet and it wasn’t going on very easy. I was frantically trying to hook up my stunt cock, and she said “let’s just see what you can do”

She unlocked me and I was in her in a heart beat. She even let me be on top and I was going as hard and deep as I could. I was actually lasting awhile, between the drinks and lack of sleep, I was thinking that orgasm was an impossibility. I kept at it and after awhile she said “I’m going to need doxi(wand)”. I hand her the powerful tool and try to keep fucking her while she grinds it on her clit(hard to reach inside of her when i have to give her room for her toy).

She has a nice orgasm and removes the wand from her sensitive bits, and I continue to try to cum but it is no use. She says “awe, looks like you don’t get to cum after all, you should probably lock up” I was beside myself with need, as she rolled me off of her. I said “what about a hand, I could get there with your hand?” She said “use yours”. I didn’t need her to ask twice. I gave it the ol “ok” grip and with her wetness still on me, I began to rapidly rub. I was too shocked to do the things I used to do when getting myself off, no finger touching anus, no nipple rubbing and pinching, it was strictly trying to reach euphoria. It only took about 30 seconds, and for the first time in almost 3 years I gave myself an orgasm.

Will have to practice getting the harness ready, I hate that she didn’t get the pleasure she wanted because of fiddling with logistics.