The drop after orgasm affects me as the keyholder, too. I never realized it could have that effect on me. Then when he says he wants a break from chastity, without us talking about it first...wow, that sends me spiraling down pretty bad. How does one recover from the drop and breaks in chastity. Me stepping right back in as his owner doesn't work, as he is turned off to chastity for hours or days.
That's the whole point of chastity... not having the drop. Having a full orgasm means having the drop, so as IB-Chaste says, don't allow the orgasms. How frequently does he have a full orgasm? If it's more often than monthly, then that's far too frequent to really get the full benefits of chastity. Because it takes between one week or three for the male hormones to settle down into the no-orgasm state, having orgams more frequenly than than means you're not really getting or experiencing the full deal. You need to be in chastity long enough that you go past the "I'm frustrated I want an orgasm" phase, and get to the "I'm in bliss, I DON'T WANT an orgasm and the drop" phase.
I don't experience a drop, maybe i'm lucky. I used to when masturbating but since being locked up i have no drop after kh allows me an orgasm.
I don't experience the drop, when I orgasm my wife locks me up, and almost immediately I start the high and get hard right after the key leaves the lock.
I think a lot of it depends on how long the lockup goes. It seems the more time in between orgasms the bigger the drop. A 2x or weekly frequency goes to monthly for one reason or another and release happens and is followed by a bigger drop than usual which triggers the wrong reaction to go even longer and eventually almost never. My wife and I have PIV 1-2x a week and I remain desperate for her. But when I once went 3 weeks and finally got a release I felt like I had a minor cold for a few hours, felt like crap and just wanted more and more O's. Back to a few times a week and all is good.
I'm like @Chaste Bear And @Caged curious . My wife teases me 4-5x / week, I'm never let out between releases for play, and I go right back in after an orgasm. When I go at least 3-4 weeks between releases and have only one full orgasm, I don't become satiated and don't experience a drop. I can occasionally have an orgasm without a drop with only a 1 week lockup if there gave been multiplkelong lockups beforehand. I also don't get ruined orgasms, no pegging, and no milking. Lots of T&D keeps my libido in high gear.
I'd say the key is discipline for both parties. Talk about what you'd like to achieve and then adhere to discipline. If he abruptly wants out make it clear you won't just lock him up again just because he wants to. Make it clear that chastity means you get to be in control and not his whims. I'm very submissive but I also experience a bit of a drop after being granted an orgasm. What keeps me in my place, or puts me back fast is: 1. I'm wearing some permanent restraints that don't come off that remind me of my position (day collar and ankle ring) 2. I am required to eat all cum right afterwards without exception. If I relented on both it would also mean I'm not really my Wife's slave. Since I know I want to live as Her slave I'll easily overcome a drop. For my Owner it means that She knows to enforce my lasting submission by either ordering me to clean up my cum, or by pushing my face in or toward it. This will leave less room for me imagining that I'm free to do as I please. So keep the discipline going, and it'll become a second nature for both.
My Wife (KH) and I hate the "drop". When my Wife allows me an orgasm, she will tease me for a few minutes, get me hard again, bring me back to the edge, then makes me put my cage back on. She didn't like how long it took me to get back into the mood to put my cage back on. This happened when we first started MC. It hasn't been a problem for a while... I haven't had an orgasm since spring of this year.
The drop may be necessary The whole Sub/Dom experience is based on the subs fantasy, and trusting the dom with control of them The drop and break from chastity may be necessary for your subs experience Plus without the salty, the sweet ain't as sweet Everyone is different, but I need an encouraging Dom, I don't do well with a degrading one What I suggest, as it's what works for me, let the drop happen, and after a day or two of freedom, tell them how happy you were when they were locked Make it about the two of you, not just one of you
Some great advice here. You'll find something that works for you. In our WLM, D/s lifestyle, I also had the drop once I was allowed to release. We feel (as males?) once we had our orgasm that we are alpha or something and not what we're supposed to be to our wives, submissive. Once you can snap him out of that mind set, you'll both be much happier IMHO. My wife uses eating my cum to snap me back. Having to eat it once we have had or orgasm is the last thing we want to even think about. The first time is the hardest Once he has no choice but to eat, lick it all up, the submissive part of his brain kicks back in. Cut my sub drop from days to almost nothing. The other trick is, the second he stops pumping his mess, hand him his cage and tell him to put it back on NOW. That is again the last thing we want after we had our orgasm. Snaps him back There's a few things that you can to do to make sure he does as you want. Secure a leg to the bed frame with a lock and let him know he's not going anywhere until he does as he's being told. He'll agree to the locking if he thinks he gets to cum! You can break him of that bad (male) habit! Good luck.
Must admit, sub drop or just the drop can sometimes hit me hard, I probably mask it by trying not to cum as obviously no drop, if I do cum and drop just being reassured and spoken to helps reaffirm things and locking straight back up after works. Plus punishment for poor behaviour usually works (even if it’s just the threat of it lol).
It's the opposite for me Orgasms cause me to want to serve Going to long without causes a drop for me Too long and I lose interest in the person I'm with
Also understand this perspective… too long without orgasm and your blissful period becomes normality. It loses its persuasion.