The Big Question-Long Term/Permanent Chastity

Discussion in 'Chastity and orgasm denial' started by wishful4, Jun 22, 2010.

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  1. wishful4
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    wishful4 Member

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    I think every chastised male will confront this question with his keyholder at some point in their journey. When I first started exploring this lifestyle, it was just a distant fantasy I had read about in fictional stories. As I have progressed, it now has a component of reality to it, although still somewhere in the distance. My keyholder has broached the subject of long term chastity in passing, whether intentional or not I don't know. Each time a bit more direct. Maybe just to gauge my reaction. I think the question for me may come before the end of my current lockup. That causes me a bit of anxiety. Why? Because I can see it may be possible to stay locked up in my device for a long time with proper care and cleaning. I barely notice it now except when aroused. The anxiety is, what will my answer be? What should I consider? I see long term and/or permanent chastity as wearing the device continually except for occasional releases as allowed by my keyholder/spouse. But, will that be what she sees or wants? Why do I harden in my device at the mere thought of it? Am I afraid of what my answer will be? What will it be???? I'm thinking, thinking, thinking......................
     
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  2. chaste777
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    chaste777 chaste777

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    My definition of permanent chastity?

    The rules of permanent chastity are as follows. The device stays on 24/7 with no hope of release, unless one of the following stipulations occurs: A - a medical emergency and/or cleaning/hygiene necessitates complete removal of the chastity device, B - the device breaks through wear and tear and needs replacing, or C - a better quality device is purchased and needs fixing into place. Unless one of these three stipulations arises, the male chastity device remains on permanently, with no hope of release.

    In a normal enforced male chastity arrangement, there are releases every few days/weeks/month/months, etc. Whereas in permanent chastity, the device stays on 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365/6 days a year, and the chaste male is not allowed any releases for orgasm and is not allowed any orgasms whatsoever.

    Permanent chastity - NO more orgasms, NO more releases, just endless and merciless enforced chastity and endless and merciless orgasm denial!

    ************

    That's my definition.

    At my own request, I am in a state of permanent male chastity and permanent male orgasm denial. My last ruined orgasm was in August 2009. Since then, I have been wearing a CB-6000 24/7.

    I wear a male chastity device, 24/7, on a permanent basis. I became a permanent chastity slut in mid August 2009, when I had my last ruined orgasm. I decided then that what I really needed is permanent chastity; i.e. indefinite, continuous, perpetual orgasm denial and enforced chastity! Permanent chastity - NO more orgasms, NO more releases, just endless and merciless enforced chastity and endless and merciless orgasm denial. Sex is extremely pleasurable as is orgasm and ejaculation, but what I really love is the feeling of constant sexual frustration and the physical feeling of being locked inside a male chastity device, as well as the finality of permanent male chastity and permanent male orgasm denial.

    As of Friday 4th of June, I am keyholded by Goddess Becca (also known as Miss Becca, Mistress Becca and Mistress Star). Like me, Goddess Becca is also into Permanent Male Chastity and Permanent Male Orgasm Denial. What a sweet, kind and thoughtful lady she is, to permanently deny me so!
     
  3. jeank
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    jeank Member

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    The definitions are always a little difficult. Chaste777's is one which really is permanent, and it clearly works for him, but if by long term/permanent chastity you mean that you wear the device all the time except for the occasions when your KH decides to let you out for Her pleasure, or to let you clean up properly and shave, which reading your post again I think you may, then I have that arrangement and I think you'll find a lot of the folks on here do as well.

    Something to be nervous about? After 8 months, I would be nervous about it being any other way. I have become really used to wearing the device and feel naked without it. Plus it really emphasises the control element in my head, and means that I think about Her all the time.

    I have lost control of my penis, and She only takes it out when She wants to use it, or to have it cleaned, and makes sure it's carefully put away again when She's finished with it. Just like any of Her other treasured possessions. It may get released after 1 week, 3 weeks or.... I never know in advance. And just because it's let out, it doesn't mean it gets to cum.

    I think that's what I wished for, and although the reality is not quite what I expected, I can honestly say I have no regrets.. :rolleyes:
     
  4. Burger_01
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    Burger_01 Chastity Geek

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    Hey Wishful4,

    It's good that you're thinking, but don't get too far ahead of yourself. What's the point in having worked out the answer to all these questions if your partner has no intention of asking them!?

    You already know what your answer will be to permanency.. you just need the confidence to believe in your thoughts.

    Will she see permanent the same way you do? If you want to know, you need to ask..

    Why do you get hard thinking of it? well yes, if you can answer this one let us all know :)

    If you're having thoughts about it because you feel like you want to go longer, or should go longer, then bring those up with your partner.. maybe she's happy as is, maybe she wants to try longer periods too. Don't be afraid to discuss things.. maybe you both want to try longer lock ups on a short term basis; maybe like 6months or a year and then have a "review night" where you will both sit down and talk about how it's been and if you enjoyed it. As JeanK pointed out, after 8 months, he wouldn't have it any other way!
     
  5. kinky6666
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    kinky6666 Junior Member

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    Hi, you say it is not really what you expected?? Reading your experience so far I guess we are in a similar situation, my wife has taken control (struggling a bit at the start) and I only get a release every 2-5 weeks, I never know.
    And yes I still would like to be free - I guess the joy of masturbation is always there in my mind - but at the same time I love this lifestyle.
     
  6. jeank
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    jeank Member

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    Thinking about it, it would be remarkable if the reality was the way I expected. I embarked on the journey with a fantasy of what would happen, but that was MY fantasy.

    In practice, it's about what She wants, not what I want, and the chances of that being the same as my initial fantasy....... :mellow:
     
  7. Sarah
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    Sarah Sarah

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    Well, no. It's actually about what you both agree and consent to. Let's not pretend you don't have a choice here, because you most certainly do.

    Sarah.
     
  8. Celtic Queen
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    Celtic Queen Senior Member

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    My view is that this is all as individual as your own relationship. If you both like the idea of permanent chastity in terms of total orgasm denial then that works for you and that's great. There isn't a cheat sheet for all this, it is absolutely defined by what you both want and need. It's where there is a mismatch / miscommunication that the trouble starts.

    I consider my hub and I to be practicing chastity even though whatever else we do, he knows he will get some form of orgasm every two weeks. That is what currently works for us and in between, he is now on the honour system although I reserve the right to put him back in his device anytime I feel it is necessary. This is most likely to be business trips away and reversion to unwanted behaviours. Through a combination of trial, error and training, we are where we are. It may not work for others but the key is that - to my mind - this is male chastity because I control his orgasms - not him. The two week rule is part of a written agreement between us and some out there would say "well , thats not a proper chastity agreement then" but it works for us. All of this is mutual, subject to review and open for discussion as we see fit.
     
  9. jeank
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    jeank Member

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    Sarah, I think you may have misunderstood what I wrote?

    The overall arangement is most certainly consensual, but the day to day application of that arrangement is very much one way only - when I get released/locked is Her decision only and I have absolutely no input unless asked.

    The point I was trying to make was that before starting on the journey, I had an idea of what prolonged chastity would be like based on a fantasy. The actual experience is different because of my Wife's interpretation of the KH role, which is Her way and not mine, but I am more than happy to go along with Her way anyway.

    In fact as a submissive male Her way is just dandy.....
     
  10. Sarah
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    Sarah Sarah

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    So the device is impossible to remove, then?

    Sarah.
     
  11. jeank
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    jeank Member

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    You've lost me - I really can't see what point you are trying to make, other than that the arrangement is consensual, which of course it is and I can't see where I said anything to the contrary.

    But I have agreed to give my Wife control, and I live with that decision as a matter of honour - it's actually about trust and love and keeping my word to Her.

    And we are having a lot of fun with it....
     
  12. Goddess Jen
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    Goddess Jen Expert in tease and denial

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    That is the key right there. I say this to my husband and Dan all the time. If it's not fun, why are we doing this?? If it's becoming a chore or something I don't want to be bothered with..it's time to take a break. So far, it's still a freaking blast!!

    Happy Chaste Days, my friends :)
     
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  13. Jabber43
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    Jabber43 Just Another Member

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    I think both Sarah and jeank are right here.

    Of course the chastity is consensual. It has to be, and no device is impossible to remove. But it is also a form of power exchange, where the person in chastity consensually gives up part of his freedom.

    For me it has to do with trust and honesty from both sides in the relationship. Open and honest communication is needed for it to work. And trust has to be built: The keyholder has to trust that the person in chastity does not break out of the device, and the person in chastity has to trust that the keyholder will not keep him locked for (much) longer than he likes.

    For the trust to build, open and honest communication is needed. But the time to do this communication has to be carefully chosen. Doing it at a time of teasing, or when other sexual activities takes place is not good. If the sub tries to do it during a session, it will be seen by the dom as an attempt to dom from the bottom, which is not good.

    A personal example: For the last few months I have had a keyholder in another part of the world. I told her upfront that I wanted short lockup durations, but wanted her to give me permission before unlocking. At an earlier time in this relationship I thought I was being locked in chastity too much so I told her how I felt, and it helped because she let me be free of my chastity device more. But right now I have been locked up for longer than ever before. I could easily break the numbered plastic lock, but she would know. I think she is testing me, trying to build the trust she needs. Being locked for this long is not what I want, but I endure it because I want to show her that I can be trusted. Tonight I was teased really bad but still not allowed to unlock, and I am considering to have another honest and open conversation. But not tonight right after the tease. Maybe tomorrow.
     
  14. Jimi123
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    Jimi123 Senior Member

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    I think Sarah's point is that there are things like hack saws, bolt cutters etc and if the guy locked up really wanted out it would take all of 15 minutes or less to remove it.
     
  15. Mistress Becca
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    Mistress Becca Doyenne of the Mansion!

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    But what's the point of getting out of it without your KH's consent?

    You're in the dog house, your KH is pissed off at you, and could justly say "fuck this, it's not worth it if you're going to piss about" - is it worth it for that fleeting pleasure that is an orgasm?
     
  16. Celtic Queen
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    Celtic Queen Senior Member

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    To sum it up hopefully in a non contentious way - the overarching agreement for chastity is always consensual. The day to day operation is under the control of the KH. There is in reality an pretty equal power balance - the lockee can sometimes cheat and could always escape, the KH can shatter the "illusion" of control and erotic helplessness by simply handing back the keys.
     
  17. elkies
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    elkies Junior Member

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    In my relationship with Kelkel, I have given her control over my penis as a gift. I can always take that gift back and she can always give the gift back. It is a consensual relationship. I suppose you can say I "submit" to her in this aspect even though I am the dominant one in our relationship in all other matters. You could also say that she "submits" to my desire for her to be my keyholder. The key is that we participate in this type of activity because we both receive enjoyment from it. I enjoy not knowing when my device will be removed and not knowing when I will have a ejaculatory orgasm. She enjoys the way I look at her and the extra attention she receives with me being perpetually horny. For all intents and purposes I have given my free choice to use of my penis for sexual purposes to her because it is something I want to do. Can I remove my device? Without a doubt, any device can be removed without a key. Have I tried? Absolutely not. It would destroy the feeling of not having control and it would damage the trust that we have worked so hard to achieve in our relationship.

    Just my two cents,
    Tom
     
  18. Slave_Scott
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    Slave_Scott Owned and Controlled By Mistress Shar

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    I've been reading all the interesting replies and they all have a lot of mert. Now I have only been looked up for three weeks now with both my Mistress and myself in a mutual understanding. The way I have been feeling towards my Mistress is total respect and gratatude for going along with this new life style with me. Staying horny 24 hours a day has made me realize how much I love and care for my wife/Mistress and I just can't do enough for her in my mind. :)
    It'sike we just got married again, now we have been married for 15 years and I have allways loved her dearly but now I want to please her all the time. Mistress actually oferd a release to me last week because she felt I might not be liking it but I asked to please leave me in the device untill she felt I earned the pleasure of making love to her with my cock. I love intercource but I love beeing horny all the time even more. We have lots of toys that I make her happy with nightly and making her happy is now my goal in life.
     
  19. wishful4
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    wishful4 Member

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    All of you are right. It is a consensual agreement. However, I have a hard time saying no to my KH when really she wants something. We bought a very expensive bathtub for our new house because I love her and knew she wanted it and would enjoy it. If she desires permanent chastity, and I consent, I want to be able to commit completely to this arrangement, whatever it is. The question has still not come up due to the realities of everyday life. Many speak of 24/7 chastity. Man, I think reality is 24/7, and chastity is a small part of that, whether you are locked, or not. We operate as equals, sharing the decision making. However, where I am somewhat of an impulse person, she thinks things over thoroughly and given all the facts, tends to make better day to day life decisions than I do. She handles all the day to day finances and I generally make investment decisions with our retirement nest egg(sometimes impulse decisions)which incur her wrath. Our relationship is evolving all the time. Some times I think it is a rudderless ship. Anyway, thanks for all the replies to my original question. My friends at CM will be the first to know if and when the question is asked and what the answer is including the details. Stay tuned!!
     
  20. slaveasa
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    slaveasa New member

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    Several people have pointed out that all devices are removable...TRUE, at some level all chastity is about trust and has to be enjoyable for the partners. If you want long term chastity there are several devices that are secured by piercings, and these are much, not absolute but much, more secure. PA piercings are the most common...not terribly inconvenient, or painful... and easiest to wear, keep clean, and pass thru airport security. check PA 5000. And , yes this is the system my wife/Mistress and I are implementing, she requested the piercing, I have been piercied for about 2 months and am preparing to stretch the 10ga up in order to fit the device
     
  21. muzzledman
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    muzzledman muzzledman

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    hi wishful4,were all creatures of habit & us here in thi lifestyle overindulgers.i want more of everything i like. its ever expanding-evolving.you know your going to say yes.i say yes to life.ive only had to drop one thing in life. i believe all of us in this wont let go of chastity unless we have to. enjoy the journey.mm
     
  22. filltee
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    filltee Junior Member

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    Im very much in tune with Tom on this. In a sense its more like enforced tantric sex.

    Initially my periods of being locked and denied were very short, but over time became gradually longer but always with a 'target' date. My partner let me know that she would like us to have longer periods of me being locked so she could enjoy herself more by not revealing a target date or indeed a date for anything, unless she wanted to, though she may not keep them. After a little thought I asked her if she meant that she would like me to be locked 24/7/365 and for her to have full contol of when I got out , whether or not we'd have intercourse or of course whether or not I'd get to cum. She said she did, I agreed to it and she was instantly ecstatic, giddy and horny as hell. I loved being locked and denied for and by her. I would not have consented to me being completely chaste nor would she have ever wanted that, and we both knew that about each other. We also did both want and agreed to a fixed review date, fixed so neither of us would have to bring it up.

    We had discussed and mutually agreed every way-stage and that for me is without doubt the key to it all.
     
  23. cagemeplease
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    cagemeplease Guest

    777-In the matter of chastity, you and i are almost mirror images. Not necessarily the 'rules', rules are negotiable, but on what I desire & what she has promised to give me-total 24/7/365 permanent, no release chastity. I'm currently on day 50. At 64 she's finally acknowledged her desire for sex is nil. A couple days ago I asked her directly 'Today, right this very moment--Do You really not desire me sexually any more? Or just want me to never orgasm again?' & she admitted 'Good question. Both are huge factors.' She tells me she has thought a lot over the last 6 weeks I've been gone & has much to tell me while I'm home from the oil fields this week. I'll keep this updated as we discuss things. Oh, and I also agree any type of chastity is mutual. I could cut off this Jailbird, but I begged for this. Why ruin a perfectly good marital aid?
     
  24. jemima
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    jemima maid for my Mistress

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  25. cagemeplease
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    cagemeplease Guest

    Well, it wasn't simply a reply as much as it was reviving a thread that really applied to me. And it wasn't until after I replied that this blind old man noticed he hadn't been on for 3 years. No harm, no foul.
     
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