1. jdavid
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    jdavid Member

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    I still want that nice girl. I don't expect to meet her here, but who knows. A personal ad is probably not the way to go, either!

    Wish me luck!
     
  2. stealth
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    stealth Senior Member

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    I wouldn't say that a personal ad isn't the way to go. I met my wife via a personal ad. She responded to my ad, although she also had an ad posted at the same time which I hadn't discovered yet.

    About 3-6 months after we started dating, I came clean that I was into BDSM and she happily was interested too, just had no experience with it.

    It can happen.
     
  3. cockislocked
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    cockislocked Senior Member

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    i do wish you luck. i consider my self hugely lucky to have met and married my wife, keyholder and Mistress. Mind you when W/we met none of this was on the table. The idea of female led relationship and chastity came out as at method of problem resolution. It then developed She was resistant at first but the benefits for Her soon became apparent!!!
     
  4. jdavid
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    jdavid Member

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    Thank you for that! It is very encouraging!

    A friend of mine told me something I tend to agree with, that it is better to find someone that you are compatible in every other way and not share the fetish with, than just to find someone who shares the fetish but is otherwise not a good match. But I can hope for both! (I can be very persuasive, heh heh...)
     
  5. PuppyMastersPet
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    The internet can be a good place to find a partner. It may help if you fill your profile out a bit more and put up a nice avatar to make your profile a bit more personal and inviting to potential readers. Don't give up just let people know a little about yourself.

    Join in discussions start one if you have something you want to ask, talk to people and interact. That way you might hit it off with a member. Who knows.
     
  6. cockislocked
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    cockislocked Senior Member

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    BDSM/Kink dating


    just did a quick search on the web for 'kinky' dating, (pretty sure you must have done this??) but came up with a few sites. could be worth a punt? i spent no time on the sites so can't comment but thought it might give you a starting point?? Anyone on here got a view on these sites? i reckon slave kris has a good suggestion in terms of developing your profile more... you never know!

    http://www.bdsmsingles.com/

    www.kinkydating.co.uk

    http://www.fleshnfantasy.com/
     
  7. Mistress Watchful
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    Mistress Watchful Dont believe the hype ;oP

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    Fetlife, Fetlife, Fetlife! :HappyDay:

    I really believe that is the best place to find out about local events... get down to a Munch and start meeting people. It's not scary I promise!
     
  8. gingers_sub
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    gingers_sub Junior Member

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    I agree with Mistress Watchful

    We have been a member of Fetlife from the begining and its a great resource for many things.
     
  9. jdavid
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    jdavid Member

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    ok, I appreciate all the good advice.

    I guess I'm a little shy about going to a "munch." To me, it reminds me of a lot of frat guy jokes about "rugmunching" and I have scary images in my head of guys in leather tank tops with electrified butt plus and purple hair being led around in dog collars, perhaps even so they can "eat forlornly from the dog dish." BUT....I will give it a try...
     
  10. Mistress Watchful
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    Mistress Watchful Dont believe the hype ;oP

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    Munches are the ULTIMATE in vanilla, that's very important to know. In fact, you can get in trouble for wearing subtle things like a collar or a corset. The idea is that no-one else in the pub would know why you are there.

    I was terrified of going to a Munch. I'm a reasonably confident person but was sooooo worried.

    I found two guys with the book "Touring Southern Africa" on the table, dropped off my coat said "hello, I need a drink" and pootled off to the bar. When I returned there was another newbie who had joined them and we just started chatting about work, gardening, the weather.... by the end of the night, there were about 10 of us and we were all saying "add me on Fetlife" and then we found out who was going to which club.

    That made attending a club much easier because I knew there would be people there I would know and we could all hide in a corner together!

    I do think you'll be very surprised at how friendly people are. It's completely changed my life!
     
  11. jdavid
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    jdavid Member

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    Okay, that is very reassuring, and comforting, but then again, you're in England! Maybe they break out the dog dishes with abandon here in so cal? I sure hope not. I'm gonna do it, at least it will give me something to write about and maybe some standup material.
     
  12. stealth
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    stealth Senior Member

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    The munches I've attended have been exactly as MW described, a very outwardly tame gathering of extremely twisted (in a good way) individuals. The only way you'd know anything about the group was if you were sitting at the table(s) and listening to the actual conversation when it would inevitably, quietly veer into BDSMy territory. Granted, I'm on the east coast, but if it's the same in England and DC, it probably isn't too much different on the left coast.
     
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