Some questions for males

I dont have a GF so i dont has to watch for what i say, i we are kind of drunk we talk the same way girls do, they talk how big or good we fuck and we talk about how big boobs/ass or firm they are

It will never change because it the way humans are, both genders do and it is nothing bad about it, i like big boobs and they like big cocks or muscles, dont tell me know the lie of a smart/nice guy because i am not a fool, womens want to marry the "smart" guy but they dream about others not so "smart"

 

To complete more the answer i can tell all of you that in my country is a TV show for womans (i doesnt know a single men that watches it) that is about dating but a little spicier, it is called "Mujeres hombres y viceversa", Womans, Mens and viceversa, mens usually call it Womans, Mens and Bicepsversa because all the mens are equal, petry, with muscled, nice smile, you know, models and that kind of stuff, but the same applies to the womans, all are hot and looks really nice, both genders lack brains but it is intended, they want bad boys and bad girls

https://www.cuatro.com/mujeresyhombres/ is the link to the program, it is in Spanish but only with the photos you can guess what it is happening, if you has any doubts you only has to search the name and go to images, even I think that the program must be restricted

You may think that it is something new or a test to see if it has share but no, the program started in 2008, 10 years ago and worst, last year was in the region before eating, now it is on prime time after eating where all the shows for womens are like Drama series which womens love, Soaps operas and junk in general, the stats show that is womens who almost watch it, so it is a success, they like that kind of stuff

And if you think that Spain is [insert whatever] you may be wrong, i used to watch MTV until they closed here and there was even worse shows and more explicit so it is something global, womens like that shows and mens like porn, it is our nature and we has to accept it, the only thing it is that us take it as normal while they hide and try to suppress it, is the same with sex, they wanted X but dont say or worst, if you ask for it she will tell you no even if she really wants only to doesnt loock like some kind of bitch or so they think

 

I we are a crude species and men will talk about women in a derogatory way given enough drink and the lack of women. I think the same is true for women though, given enough drink etc.

Would I ever tell my friends. Not directly no. If I were a drinker then maybe it would be easier. Me personal love is just that.

I think things are improving as we all have to be more careful and thoughtful of what we say.

 

I have had men attempt to engage in this, and I stop it (make it known I won't tolerate)/redirect or leave the conversation, especially if it is about partners/etc. There is an attempt at "camaraderie" through complaining this is pervasive (and cliche), but I don't go that way (never have). I don't delve into my female led relationship, I just terminate the engagement.

I'll note: my partner has experienced it in reverse (women complaining/derogatory)...she does not tolerate either. What is between us/among us is ours, and these attempts we find are typically working to tear down or negatively influence our relationship or others.

 

They all know she is the boss. I dont participate in talk where women are degraded. Women are the greatest gift men have and are lucky to have.
My wife has accepted her roll as the boss and she loves it. I do whatever she says and when she says it. Her opinion matters more than mine.

 

misogyny or its derivatives have no room in our lives.

on the contrary, most in our circle speak highly of women & endeavor to change the pendulum's swing toward the matriarchal.

while we live in 'redneck' country, we are in an enclave of enlightenment - so dont chance upon the uncouth often. we avoid the likely places that nonsense tends to occur.

yes, i pitch FLR regularly (even at work) - when some one asks what that is, I'll tell them to Google it, read about it & then come back to me with questions.

i manage people so am in a position to influence thought & behavior.
i believe that one can be a better professional when they have their personal lives in order first.
i inculcate respect for all people, especially women, in those i hold sway.

the vulgar are everywhere.
many just aren't going to "get it" even if you try to educate them or call them out.
i have learned (the hard way) to be careful picking my battles.

 

I do not drink. Except XMas, Birthday and after doing really a lot of work at the garden ( radler ) a craft beer contains of 50% beer and 50% limonade. But there i don't drink only with boys my wife or other girls are with us.

 

Sometimes.

 

In short, I wouldn’t be friends with men who would talk about women in a derogatory manner. It is actually my litmus test for friendship, I do not tolerate any form of sexism or misogyny, if they use them then I no longer wish to be friends with them.

As to whether I would tell my friends about my Female Led Relationship; it largely depends on the level of friendship. Casual friends who I maybe go out with occasionally, no, close friends whom I love and regard as family absolutely. My best friend knows and while she was a bit weirded out initially she sees how much I adore my wife and how much it adds to our relationship, she gets it.

 

I have been married 29 years and thankfully most of my friends don't talk like that. And my wife prefers that I keep things discreet so I would not say anything about FLR. But my friends know I am a feminist so sticking up for women's rights would come naturally

 

Yes, I have disagreed.
But the honest answer is not always.
Rightly or wrongly, I would try to apply reasonable judgement. If I felt the person genuinely believed and meant the abhorrent things they were saying then I would call them out on it, and have done in the past.
If it was just drink talking or macho bravado, then probably not.

Would I ever? Yes.
It would depend on the friends and the context of the conversation.
I would love to feel at liberty to be completely "out" and open about such things, but in reality would most likely not be brave enough, and would let discretion be the better part of valour.

I think in many cases it's just meaningless macho bravado. But I hope it can change, and would never say never.

 

I think there is a difference between guy talk and crude/degrading talk. Most guys I knew were more of the guy talk kinda people. One friend was quite rude and derogatory with women and I am no longer friends with him because of that type of behavior. He was also not the type of person to have around young children. Sadly he hasn't changed his ways, probably never will. My personally belief is that his type of behavior is learned and most likely from bad parenting. Some of the blame also falls on the females in his life who put up with his behavior.

As for what happens in me and my wife's relationship, I dont think thats anyones business except our own.

 

joker

 

Yes, it's just talk and from experience, women have the same kind of talks. How many times did my wife came home from a girl night out and explained to me how they were talking about package size, or how such or such guy looked like a meathead at the club etc.. Same thing. And as long as it's just talk, i dont mind.

I dont have friends who have the very derogatory comments towards women or anyone really other than corrupt politicians...


I would never tell MY friends about our FLR. My wife has however dropped many hints about it to her friends. Of course she has not told the full extent of it but has dropped some clues like "In my relationship, i dont give head, i get them" or when her friends were talking about plugs, she told me she said that i would enjoy them etc..

 

I have to say the crudest remarks about women I have heard have came from other women.
Sometimes I hear some derogatory comments depending on the situation I do what I think is best.

 

Goddess Lucy i think it's boys being boys and it will never change. I've been out with male friends and when they have a drink they say they are in charge but when you see them out with thier wife's or g/for thier so quiet.

 

I have not hung out with anyone who does that since my schooldays. I never said anything but it did irritate me.

If I was in a FLR I would tell my friends if my partner wanted me to. Otherwise I would keep it private.

For the last question. I make money playing video games. Sexism is still rife in gaming despite improvements. It's amazing how triggered a guy can get when losing to a girl.

 

My male friends and colleagues rarely make any derogatory comments about women. When they do it's usually not generalized misogyny (i.e. not about women as a group) but specific comments about some woman they find unattractive. I do challenge them when it happens.

I also correct them when they call adult women "girls".

 

This is a good question for all of us to think about. I've never been derogatory to women but in the (distant) past I might have made an appreciative comment to a drinking companion (privately) or agreed with one of his comments...….more recently I would just feel it to be disrespectful to the woman.....I know she is much more than a walking collection of body parts. Perhaps we should also think about staring either openly or surreptitiously because I know we men re rarely as good as we think we are at observing un-noticed. I find looking away both more difficult in terms of desire and easier in terms of discomfort from the cage. Putting both these aside I still feel it to be disrespectful. The nice part is that I find the easiest way for me to avoid temptation is to engage the woman in (respectful) conversation. Once a woman begins talking she comes alive for me as a person and I usually end up enjoying the whole experience much more than lurking longingly in the corner. Of course sometimes the cage discomfort persists but that is a small price to pay for meeting an attractive and interesting woman. Usually I get more out of the conversation because the cage tends to keep me attentive and appreciative which in turn encourages women to speak more freely ………. chastity has many benefits but this may be the best...…...all my women friends who mean so much to me.

I have attended events with my first Mistress but have not shared with other friends except one. I did not share a lot of detail but she was very kind. I would not care to share details of my sexuality with anyone except my partners but acknowledging my devotion and deference to a special woman would always be a special pleasure and I would love to be a better example to others.....

Thank you for asking Ms Lucy.

 

That's really sweet. I'm not usually brave enough, however, to engage such women in conversation.

 

This is a real issue for this "recovering male." Women are just so darned attractive and I've always been fascinated with their bodies, but it can definitely lead to viewing women in an objectified way and thinking about them that way too. I've definitely been guilty of that and am trying to recover. One example: I'm trying to rewire my brain not to think about the word "tits" and to think instead of her "breasts" whenever I see an attractive woman on the street or in the office. For me, that's becoming a real way to recognize her as a thinking living superior woman and not just a porn fantasy, This is a lot easier when I'm locked in chastity, because I know in my heart that I am no longer and cannot be that type of man, that I cannot even think of fucking. It leaves me open to understand that I am submissive to her and all women and will defer to her, just as I am submissive and defer to my Mistress, and would serve them too if my Mistress required it.

 

Are you in longer term chastity? You may start to see women in a new light that shows charms beyond the physical. Not that you won't still notice physical appearance......you'll just accept that it's not for you

Really enjoyed your thoughts...….you mentioned porn and I think for many of us this is the real culprit...…..I've always enjoyed healthy relationships with women but porn creates it's own "alternate reality". Anything we can do to deprogram these objectifying terms and images from our consciousness seems worthwhile and as you say chastity keeps us mindful. Both my Mistress' have certainly helped with referring to body parts by their proper names and anything else now seems crude or vulgar. As you say, when you consider how beautiful women really are, slang terminology undermines everyones experience. And speaking of proper terminology.....there are beautiful verbs too...….my personal favorite is "suckle"

 

Here at the fire deparment some of the firefighters will talk crap about their wives or make comments about women that they see out on the streets. I never hesitate to let them know that what they are saying is disrespecting their wives and women in general. I never do that to women because its so disrespectful. I never tolerate it, not because my wife has me locked but because its wrong.

 

>> if they start discussing women in a crude derogatory manner do you ever say you disagree? <<

Most men don't do this and it makes us uncomfortable. Guys who talk *shit* are generally insecure and projecting.

>>Would you ever tell your friends about your female led relationship?<<

No.

>> Do you think such talk is just boys being boys and it will never change? <<

Maybe you are referring to younger men in their late teens and early twenties. I imagine this group will continue being immature and boyish. It's the combination of enhanced libido and inaccessibility.

 

i will be totally honest here. As far as friends i made past the age of about 16 (i am 47 years old) i would not be bothered making friends with anyone that makes derogatory remarks against Women, or any group of individuals for merely existing for that matter. i don't care if they mean it as a joke or not, even if meant as a joke people generally find things funny because they find an uncomfortable truth in what is said so that tells me that they actually are revealing their true selves.

Now to contradict myself with the few exceptions in my life:

There are a few friends of mine that i have known since i learned to walk. i hate to say it, but they are not very enlightened and far from rocket scientists but we have been through so much together and i love them like brothers. i do not see them often but when i get together with them they do get to pretty rough talking and make lots of derogatory remarks, which they present as jokes, regarding women / their wives / ex girlfriends / etc... i just generally shake my head and say something stupid like "oh man, you didn't go there." Which actually often backfires because they find it even funnier that they got a rouse out of me. i generally just leave it there with these guys though because 1. i see them maybe 2 or 3 times a year, 2. i know they are not mean spirited in reality they just don't really understand what they are perpetuating and if i explained it to them i'd get blank stares. They actually do love their wives very much and would do anything for them, their communication skills are just at a very base level. i do have a few relatives i am in the same boat with on this one. You don't always get to pick and choose your loved ones, unless they really were horrible people, then i'd kick them right out my life.

i would love to say that i defend my stance in every single situation, and i do outside these few personal exceptions in my life.

As far as FLR's, i have never openly declared this to my family and old friends, but i believe it was quite apparent in my past relationships. i felt no need to disclose this to my family but some of the Women i dated in the past were pretty vocal about it so i might as well been wearing a sign around my neck The Woman who holds the key to my chastity now is a Professional Dominatrix, very active in the lifestyle, and very outspoken and free about everything. i do hope something comes of it. i never met anyone quite like her really so i'm just following her lead and see where it goes.