Slowly dipping in my toes, Im ready to participate

Discussion in 'Introductions' started by SheMastersMyDomain, Oct 20, 2019.

  1. SheMastersMyDomain
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    SheMastersMyDomain In continuous chastity since 1/1/19

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    Hi CM.
    I stumbled upon CM late in 2018 while researching various cages. I joined in the beginning of 2019 and have been reading the forums regularly ever since. I have been somewhat reluctant to begin posting because it takes me out of my personal comfort zone, but at the same time, there are often threads with which i closely identify that have made me want to begin participating on the site. I also have a couple reviews i want to do and a key project i hope to report on soon. I hope to draw upon my experience in chastity to be a positive contributor to CM.

    About me:
    I have been married to my KH/wife for 18 years. After having two children, in the ensuing several years, our personal relationship was really suffering. We were far less intimate and growing apart. I was masturbating often (I have always masturbated a lot) and was finding that when she was finally ready for intimacy, i was spent from self-pleasuring. I had been fantasizing about various kinks while masturbating, chastity being one of them. About 5 years ago, I wrote her a long letter asking her to try chastity and asked her if she would be my KH, in an attempt to regain some lost intimacy. She agreed to try and over the next several years we played with chastity intermittently for several weeks at a time. Sometimes a few months at a time. I went about collecting a variety of cages purchased online, searching for one that i could comfortable wear continuously (which i have found, i love my cherry keeper). In the first half of 2018, i was in chastity for about 6 months continuously. Then we took a break for the last several months of 2018. On the last day of 2018, i asked her if she would lock me back up as i had just purchased my first cherry keeper cage and had recently received a HT nano that was pretty comfortable. I have been locked since the first day of 2019.

    Over the first several months of 2019, i communicated a bunch with JosieLynn Jewell (cherry keeper maker) and ordered a series of cages, rings, and parts. Each time getting closer to the elusive comfortable fit i was seeking. I have finally settled on a combination of sizes that is very comfortable and confining for me (the good kind of confining). But my point here, is that in a message exchange thanking JosieLynn, JosieLynn replied that they were happy to help me with my kink. This turned out to be sort of a light bulb moment for me. Underneath all my layers, i had been feeling some guilt for liking this chastity thing so much. And this exchange with JosieLynn just made me realize I am a kinky individual and that's OK. In the couple weeks that followed, I felt so much more at peace with my desire to be kept in chastity by my wife. I then approached her with it and shared how much i liked my kink, how much i liked her being my KH, and I doubled down by asking her if she would help me in my kink and to continue indefinitely. In my mind, it was sort of like my coming out moment.

    Our experience has not been without its bumps in the road. Im guilty of topping from the bottom sometimes. I have felt abandoned for long periods of time that were really a drag. But one of the most important things i learned from this website this year, is the importance of communicating honestly and fully with your partner. My wife is not particularly communicative about our relationship, so I have had to work hard to open those lines of communication and keep them going. I really laid my heart and my kink out there. Its a good thing she didn't stomp it out (haha). Seriously, It has worked really well. Although she is still a little more guarded than I, we have been growing in this relationship together and finding what works for us. Its probably a little lighter and less FLR-like than many on here, but the other thing i have learned by reading this site all year, is that there are as many ways to fashion a chastity relationship as there are colors in the rainbow and everyone does it a little different. In one of our conversations she revealed that she needed some help sometimes with the when and what to do to keep me going. We established that its ok for me to sometimes suggest things to help this along with no expectations that she will do them, but to help her with ideas. This seems to be working reasonably well.

    The important part of our chastity relationship, is that i have given her complete control of my erections and she only releases me when she wants PIV, or to tease me. We have settled into a pretty good routine (we are both routing based people, which makes for a good match). I wake her every morning with oral. After working her up to her first orgasm, she usually wants PIV and releases me for that. I bring her to usually several more orgasms. I never get to orgasm this way. Over the last 5 years, she has helped train me to conduct PIV for a long time without orgasm or ejaculation. I do have to stop often to prevent it, but then i can go again and it all works out pretty good (for her). She never allows me to have an orgasm this way. In fact, i have not had what i call a free range orgasm in 2019 (more on that in a minute). After she is done, we head to the shower where i wash her from head to toe. After showering and shaving myself, I then put the cage back on and ask her to lock me up. She wears the key on a long chain on her neck and she reports to me that she likes having the key on her neck. I am currently working on making a nicer key for her - hope to post on that in the next month or so. She likes massages sometimes at night, and i am happy to oblige whenever she requests one. While i have not had a full orgasm in 2019, she has provided me a series of various ruined orgasms. And we have started exploring prostate miking and orgasm in the last several months. I really like it a lot and she teases me that it is the only way i am now allowed to cum (and she knows i like the teasing). It took a few months of trials, but she finally found and can massage my prostate to milk me. She also figured out how to make me have an orgasm this way, which she has given me on several occasions. I had purchased a stainless steel arched wand that turned out to be the elusive but needed tool for her to use on me.

    Wow, this was a lot longer than i thought. But i guess i have been thinking for a while on what i wanted to say. It feels kind of good to get it all out there, like a release of anxiety and the calming that follows. I don't know how much or often i will post, but it feels good to come out of the shadows and be a member of the community.
    Thanks for looking
    SheMastersMyDomain
     
  2. jemima
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    jemima maid for my Mistress

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    coo that is a long one. but welcome to here and I hope you like it here as well now that you dip your toe in. :)
     
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  3. elias
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    elias 7/7 on the TomAllen-Rectrix scale

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    Nice story and looking forward to read more posts!
     
  4. madams-sissysub
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    Hi there and welcome to the mansion!
     
  5. LesterBallard
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    LesterBallard Long term member

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    hello and welcome aboard.
     
  6. Sissy-CJ
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    Sissy-CJ Long term member

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    Welcome to CM, enjoy (0:
     
  7. Ms Maree
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    Verified Female

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    Forget dipping your toes in....jump right in and join us ;-)

    Welcome to CM
     
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  8. HappilyLockedMan
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    HappilyLockedMan Long term member

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    As many others have said, Welcome.

    You mentioned your acceptance of your kinkyness and your wife's acceptance as well. This has been very important for me, the same as for you. It has meant a lot to me to come out of my kink closet and finally be able to be open with my wife about my kinky desires.

    Quite a few of the men posting here seem to have much more actively kinky lives than I do, and I have to admit that I'm jealous. However, when I look at where my wife and I were five years ago and where we are now I feel much better about my (our) situation.

    Welcome again. You have a lot in common with a lot of us here.
     
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  9. Chaste J.
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    Chaste J. Long term member

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    Nothing kinky about male chastity! Leaving penis's free to do as they please! Doesn't make any sense at all! :)
     
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  10. MissyB
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    MissyB Long term member

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    Welcome to our community and good luck on your journey.
     
  11. SheMastersMyDomain
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    SheMastersMyDomain In continuous chastity since 1/1/19

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    YES YES YES! thanks for your comment. It feels like such a big relief to be out of my kink closet
     
  12. SheMastersMyDomain
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    SheMastersMyDomain In continuous chastity since 1/1/19

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    Thanks everyone for the welcome to CM!
     
  13. sissy_christine
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    sissy_christine Long term member

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    very nice story and Welcome to the Community :)
     
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