So I posted in my journal - Titles and limits / ideas - about the difficulty in finding a suitable title for my girlfriend when she is in a dominant / commanding mood. I explained more in the post but basically I like the idea of something along the lines of 'Mistress' or 'Miss' but I think she would maybe like something that sounds a bit prettier but still with a similar authoritative feel to the name. We have looked at some of the other common ones like Goddess and Princess but again those she found didn't feel very natural. Any suggestions? Also how do you try these names out, she is from a vanilla background so may also be a bit shy with trying these so when you were starting out did you find a good way to test the water with these sorts of things?
The point of using a title is to convey respect and acknowledgment of her authority. I don't know if any title is going to be "pretty". Maybe a title in a different language might sound better.
I will show her this thread to get opinion, not sure if Boss will be her favourite but you never know! That's an interesting idea. We have two different first languages so maybe something from her first language or from a language neither of us are familiar with. Something to explore for sure. I also get your point about the meaning of the title and so actually maybe as we go further into this it may not be an issue. Yes that one is quite nice as it is a bit less 'strong' than Mistress but still carries with it respect and authority whilst sounding a bit softer.
Queen. CEO. President. Pick a formal title that suits the two of you as you need to remember that she is the alpha of the relationship. You can also use alpha as it also blends nicely and think about what people will think and say if you refer to her as the alpha. That doesn't mean she can't delegate authority or mean she can't submit to you either. She can state to you tonight I want you to take me and ravish me completely and you are in charge. Prove to me I chose well and your reward can be a repeat of tonight when I choose.
Does she want a title or is this mainly you? If the latter, don't try to force things. I feel like you're guilty of doing some topping from the bottom while your GF is figuring things out. Don't. Let things develop at her pace.
When in pubic we use Ma’am mostly. Like Joey Love says it shows respect and is still Vanilla enough that if we don’t want other to know about our personal life they won’t.
That's a fair point, and certainly something I'm keen to avoid (topping from the bottom). Originally she suggested a title (Goddess) but after trying it we didn't feel it felt right. So she then asked me to work out some other options to try. I think though it is possible none of those will really work as she might not be comfortable in general with anything that has the authoritative overtones yet (or possibly ever, which is fine too). My hope with this thread was to be able to get some options that are more real world and less fantasy and then link her to the thread to see if she wants to try any of them. I definitely don't want to push any onto her, she makes me incredibly happy without a title and it is entirely up to her if she feels she would like to have a title used in some circumstances. Appreciate all the suggestions so far.
The simple title of Mrs Chaste at all times! Well obviously not Mrs Chaste but Mrs (real surname). Our friends find it amusing as in the real world I'm very much my own person and not dominated or humiliated in public.
We use a number of different titles. We started with the formal address of "My Darling HOH" (Head of Household) which gets shortened to My Darling in public. We both know what it refers to. The which we use both in private and in public is "Lady C", which all our friends and family think is because She does have and can use the title Lady. We can also take that one further - a drink for the Lady please etc. Whatever you choose, have fun, [no title, subby] A
I usually say yes Ma'am. When sister-in-law was visiting I often replied to my wife with yes Ma'am. She just smiled.
We came up with mistress Amante (Italian), mostly because I needed to call her something in my blog. She picked it. A month or so later she came up with our commandments (she didn’t like the title of contract), in that she suggested that I call her mistress Amante or mistress when alone or in a non formal setting. To tell you the truth I really only use it when texting her. There just isn’t many times I would need to say her name when we are together alone...it just doesn’t come up, we know who we are talking to. I even tried to purposely make sure I did it, but again, I don’t actually say her name to her. Example: Her: I could sure use a foot rub Me: sure ok I wouldn’t say sure ok Nicole. Her: I’m getting hungry. Me: me too I wouldn’t say, “I am too, Nicole.” So when I text her in her he morning I would text something like “good morning my beautiful mistress” or “good morning mistress Amante” If she wanted to get more into it in a play session, I’m sure it would be natural, but for daily activity and chit chat, we found it impractical.
Thanks again for all the replies, great to get so many different suggestions and perspectives. @Nicoftime - yes I think if we used it at all it would be similar where it would only be in circumstances where it more naturally fits. I can't really imagine it feeling right to use all the time, having said that of course I could be wrong and maybe at some point it would feel naturally right that way.