So you've been at it for a while now! Cage choice, check! Subservience, check! Oral pleasures on demand, check! Rationed release programme, check! All is well! Maybe.... He winges occasionally because he feels neglected, some days he's not as obedient as promised, you start to feel less confident, marginally reticent about expressing your dominance, things starting to unravel. A tipping point has occurred, an inflection point, possibly? We've all been there and those who have, will be at some stage. What to do? May be the answer to that question lies in what you have learned about the relationship leading up to that point. What do you now know about him during this period of containment and deference, what do you now know about what he really wants? What have you discovered about yourself, your limits, your desires, needs, triggers? The inflection point is the position of change. Potential to achieve new levels of commitment from him and dominance from you, but also the potential to revert back to full vanilla. One may require more extreme measures, breaking new boundaries, discovering darker deeds. The other may leave an empty space, a memory of what could have been. The inflection point is a big revealer, a tell, and you never know what that is until you reach it. Sometimes you'll see it coming, others, it mugs you. So when and i really do believe when it arrives, embrace it, look it square in the eyes and own it! It doesn't define you, it provides new opportunities, choose well, it could be the real you moment.
Very well written and to the point as usual Mandyand I always enjoy your thoughts and observations! You really do have a very clear vision for the components needed to succeed and enjoy this lifestyle.
Well stated. Early on (at the suggestion of an older couple, long time in the lifestyle who were mentoring us) suggested keeping a journal and sharing the journal and sharing entries with each other. During some of the bigger bumps along the way we also set up a day and time to have a good sit down conversation. While we were very open and honest even back in the dating days some topics...you know...sometimes a tad awkward to bring up at the "right" time to discuss. It's worked for us and it does help tremendously in helping you break barriers and reach new levels. Or some might say new depths
I wrote a story for my wife with the title where do we go from here. The story took place three years in the future with me reflecting on how our lives had changed since starting chastity. The first part of the story was all true and based on what has changed in the last year plus. From there I improvised drawing on things that I thought would appeal to her. I followed a logical potential evolution. I didn't just write it so all of a sudden she was doing crazy stuff she'd never consider. I gave it to her with a note that essentially said, this isn't a script I'm asking for, it's a story to get you thinking about where you might like to take this relationship. I included a care package with a shirt that said I love my husband...locked, a pair of panties that said hot wife and a few temporary tattoos with a variety of personal messages marking me as her property. She thanked me for the gift, but said she's real happy where things are now and has no interest in changing them. She has worn the panties a few times and hiked up her dress to show me in very arousing settings. The shirt and the tattoos are still in the box. While I would love to see her embrace some of the things I wrote about or you talk about @Mandynjack I'm also coming to peace with following her lead.