Post-orgasm behavior

Actually it doesn’t happen quite nearly enough that she tells me to lock it back up. It literally makes it hard to get the cage on when she says to put it in. But it’s rare that she comes out with it to be honest. I would say that between 3-5 days for me to hit my stride of horny after locking up but it can be much quicker if she is engaged and teasing me about it.

On a day like today where I am perfectly content being locked up with no agreed upon release and I can be honest with myself about the effects that full orgasm has on me and that I know I should have as few as possible.

However, as is typical in our life she will eventually want to have sex and then I will “stay out for the night” which can turn out to be just for the night or for the next two months. In the case where it is months things begin to devolve as I take matters in to my own hands so to speak and she finally catches on to why I’ve been so combative. Sometimes she will say to lock up or I will mention it and she will say it’s a good idea and don’t know what you were waiting for.

Its all an in motion learning experience for the both of us and we are starting to zero in more and more on what works for us and how to enhance our love life and relationship at large.

 

1)What do you (or if you're a keyholder, your locked one) experience behaviorally/emotionally just after a full orgasm?

-Usually bliss and I get a bit giddy. I feel at peace and loved. I feel as I am one with my Wife and the Universe. It's like we are connected. We will snuggle close, wrap each other up in our arms and fall asleep.

2) Same question, but after a ruined orgasm?

-I feel frustrated but my behavior stays the same, it's as if I never had an Orgasm.

3a) How long does it take to get back to the behavior/emotions of being chaste?

-About 1-2 Days. Let me explain. After 7 days of no Orgasm, I feel right. Like this is how I am supposed to act/feel. No matter how many more days pass, my behavior stays at the Day 7 stage. My sexual energy has been built up to the level I need to feel like myself.

Now after an Orgasm, I get sent back down to the Day 3 stage. This is the "I need to Screw Something NOW!!!" stage. This is when I need to be the most careful because this is where I am at my weakest with regards to masterbation. The cage helps, so does busy work. I still am attentive to my Wife and her needs, I am just act like a sex depraved idiot. By day 4 my weakness has passed and I am I more control of my emotions and my sexual energy.


3b) What does that look like for you? More snuggly, more attentive, more productive, and/or...??

-I get back to my kind self. I can be quite the Asshole if my emotions are out of wack and my sexual energy is low or depleted. By staying in a constant state of desire, not horneyness but desire, I am a better person. A better Father. A better Husband. I no longer think of getting my just my needs met. No longer thinking about when I will get to Orgasm again. I am solely focused on being a better Dad and Husband. In other words, I stop worrying about myself and being a selfish whining little bitch and I pay attention to what really matters. My Family.

Iso.

 

Time ago I had a msg about hormone ...
It's a copy/paste from another place I've seen it .... Starting fafter -> so:

It's very long but it opens my mind's

So ...

 

https://www.chastitymansion.com/forums/index.php?threads/hormone.38934/

( Here it is )

 

No sorry , its was a personal blog and now forgot who .....
But that about hormone maked me understand a lot - not only about the game in chastery but also our normal life and how were controlled at hormones , and also the difference man/women .... So ...

 

For me, as other members have also said, once I have had a orgasm my desire to be submissive and to serve had almost completely diminished, and my interest is lack lustre at best. So after several months of anal stimulation madam decided penile stimulation was unnecessary and banned it.

 

For my self, 100% quicker and easier the more vocal she is about teasing me right back into it. In fact, her teasing or attention and desire for me to be locked or denied is the major driving factor to my desire to be chaste.

Without her encouragement and wanting it for me I would not be able to do it by myself.

 

Exact same here.

 

There was a detailed post/blog published in reuniting.info that read very much like this one (it was on Karezza but I think he called it "The science behind chastity". Just checked and the site is down.

Did find a great one https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/17137561/
That explains why I can read her mind so much better when denied and teased. I suggest that this "mind reading" ability helps me to pleasure her and helps keep the fun cycle going.

 

We have limited teasing

Indefinitely denied is certainly not something I am seeking. I am torn between wanting to enjoy the headspace of being aroused, not being too overbearing with physical intimacy (do women really want a man humping at their leg on a continual basis?) and still achieving a level of sexual satisfaction / release myself.

When we tried chastity first time around, I was released on a weekly basis. After having the device on for 99% of the time between releases, it made the stimulation 1000% better, like the first time experiencing a blow job or PIV sex. It was only after not being released weekly (e.g. if her period arrived and we didn't engage in any sexual activity) that I came to get to that next stage of constant arousal.

I am now happy to go with her schedule, if she wants PIV weekly, thats well and good. If she wants no action or just oral/toys for her, thats good too as I then get to hit other highs that you don't get to without denial.

Whilst chastity (and a chastity device) may not be for everyone, it is something that needs to be experienced to gain different perspective on sex. So often we believe that chasing orgasms is the only path to sexual fulfillment, but it is just one path.

 

Sounds familiar. Starts kicking in around day 3 then builds for a dew days until back in the euphoria and full attentiveness.

 

Dick Marcinko, in his writing about special warfare, has a list of ten specwarfare commandments. The first is "thou hast not to like it: thou hast only to do it."

I believe in this philosophy in all things.

With regard to chastity, orgasms, and so forth, my personal belief is that regardless of the male fantasy, the only opinion that counts is hers. For my wife's end, she doesn't much care about chastity one way or the other, so much of the time, if I'm locked up, I locked it. She's got a key. .

Should she choose to direct it being locked, and regardless of my feelings, it IS her choice, what I think about it is irrelevant. Like it, don't like it, doesn't matter. Whether I'm in a given "headspace" or not has no meaning. It's an abstract concept. My compliance isn't dependent on whether or not I've experienced a sexual release. It isn't dependent on a time limit, or a location.

I choose to be compliant. I choose to do as I'm asked or told. My ability to choose doesn't end with orgasm. It doesn't begin with orgasm, either.

My feelings may change. My feelings may will differ whether I'm aroused, angry, tired, apathetic, jubilant, encouraged, disheartened, or depressed. The question of the thread is behavior, however, and my behavior is not tied to my feelings. It does not change post-orgasm. I'm male. I feel tired. I live in a world in which I cannot afford to operate emotionally; my feelings are entirely irrelevant . Feelings and emotions shouldn't impact behavior, and it would be very disingenuous to act on feelings, rather than fact. if I have agreed to do something or behave a certain way, then how I feel about it does not matter. It shouldn't matter to me, and it certainly shouldn't matter to her. She should have the freedom to expect or ask or demand or tell, as she sees fit, without the constraint of worrying about how I might feel, and the confidence that what she asks or demands, she will get, regardless of what I might think or feel.

 

Sticking in a Rouge Warrior quote.

Nice.

A glass of Doctor Bombay for you.

Iso.

 

Love. Happiness. Snuggliness. Adoration. Conentment. Sleepiness.

But I also know that the chains are gone.

Haven't tried that yet.

That depends. On a lot of things, some of which are not under either of our control.

First, let me say: I truly wish that it were immediate. But it takes 1-3 days if I'm lucky, or 4-5 if I'm not.

Things that help me get there:

• Serving her in any way (which reminds me of the whole thing)
  
• Being told what to do (which reminds me of the whole thing)
• If she gets upset, it triggers it super fast, because now when she is upset, I become absolutely helpless and realize my impending loss of control, and it snowballs in a hurry.
• Obviously, tease and denial work wonders.

Bliss. I fall into sub space I guess. I definitely get more snuggly (and more needy), and much more attentive. Completely obedient. Completely respectful. Completely supportive.

My productivity will vary. Sometimes I can't stop thinking about her, so my productivity can suffer. But I also get super human stamina, and will end up working pretty much non-stop e.g. 100 hours a week including my job plus lots of stuff around the house that she wants done.

And thankful. Very thankful. Appreciative. Feeling fortunate. Lucky. Loved.

I don't really like going without orgasms. But I really like this thing that she does to my brain.

 

exactly same here

 

I think teasing and edging definitely accelerates the process of getting back into the proper frame of mind. It reestablishes the KH’s authority and also gets me to the low level buzz of being horny without relief much quicker.

 

I tend to get cranky right after a full orgasm and that lasts 6-12 hours. For me, it’s the 2nd orgasm after I’ve been denied for a while that’s the good one, so after that 12 hours or so I tend to be even hornier. She knows this and uses it.