Piggys Last Chance

Discussion in 'Female led relationships' started by BKwife, May 15, 2018.

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  1. BKwife
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    Wow!. So much of what you said is so true and our experience. Our relationship much of the time has been worrying about what he thinks and wants, both our faults, but no more!. I WANT THIS just as much as he does and leaning that he does NOT own the power anymore is something that I'm finally starting to get. I've told him his mantra is "Her needs before his" and I make him recite it often. He wanted sexual attention the other night and to get it I made him endure a good dose of humiliation for my amusement. A good time was had by all Lol!. Thanks so much again for your valuable input
     
  2. Mandynjack
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    Mandynjack Long term member

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    Your successful superiority is my pleasure. Be strong fellow Femme xx
     
  3. Rectrix
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    Rectrix Long term member

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    Love this metaphor, let her do the driving, let her take the wheel.
     
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  4. Rectrix
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    Rectrix Long term member

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    @PouchPantyLover and I have been having this back and forth discussion for a few days on exactly this issue. I disagree that it's about being satiated by orgasm though. For me, the need is to know that I'm not in this alone. I can be satiated by a phrase ("how's he feeling in there?"), a rub, and especially by an order ("please go do the laundry"). Sexual things and discipline-y things are just the cream on top of the sundae. I think the sources of this need are two: (1) being constantly locked means I'm constantly thinking about this whole situation and about here and (2) I, like most other guys, including Gigaman, have been thinking about this and obsessing about this and fantasizing about this for years. This latter part we really need to "just get over it!" I guess the point is that I feel like I need my love to *be involved* with me. I don't mind being ignored on purpose or put on ice or being made to wait. I just don't want to be ignored by accident.
     
  5. Sexy Slave 69
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    Sexy Slave 69 Long term member

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    I think it's a bit like breaking in a wild horse.
    Get the reins on and then get into the saddle. Then ride
    Everyone horse is different and subs do buck but if he's restrained eventually you can tame and direct his horny energy for yr pleasure only
     
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  6. PouchPantyLover
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    PouchPantyLover Long term member

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    Sorry I was typing hastily and with bad grammar. I'm not implying that we need an orgasm to be satiated. What I'm saying is because of our being locked up and denied we live in a constant state of arousal. The only person that can satiate that arousal for most is their key holder. The irony is when they do something big or small we can't wait for the next thing, because ultimately we are still where we started locked up and horny. The irony is that if we were given an orgasm, it would end that repetitive cycle of desire at least during our refractory period. I was mainly trying to answer the OP's question as to why we screw up constantly pushing for things when she is in charge. As with most things with guys, little head is getting in the way of the big head was probably a clearer answer.
     
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  7. BKwife
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    That's always my pigs fear is that he'll be locked up and forgotten. I need to really wrap my head around the power I have and be selfish for once. Personally it's not my nature and that's why the stopping and starting over the years. But I have come to realize this way of life, perfected, would be a fantastic way to live!. All the wise words and support of this site are truly welcome and appreciated. Keep it coming❤
     
  8. Mascara^Snake
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    Mascara^Snake Banned

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    Be more selfish than guilty. Your rules are the only rules. It can take some time to get used to but from what you've written here I think you will find the lifestyle very beneficial once you have it moving in the right direction.
    if handled correctly Chastity can be a great way to get your relationship back into the courthship phase. Where your pleasure becomes his sole pursuit.
    You might (along with some of the other advice here) want to try breaking him. So long as he's adapted to wearing for a reasonable length of time there are no comfort or hygiene issues, it can be a very good way of moving things forward.
     
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  9. BKwife
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    I definitely agree, I need to move his training forward and get him wearing for longer periods of time for sure. Thank you
     
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  10. steviepie
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    steviepie inferior and unworthy male

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    I believe I may understand (and of course agree) with your advice Mistress Amanda but I'm curious how you define "breaking" as I haven't heard you use the term before?
     
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  11. BKwife
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    Well said!. I really hope he listens☺️
     
  12. Mascara^Snake
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    Breaking him means having him wear it for a bit longer than he is comfortable with.
    That way he knows who is holding the reins.
    Of course it's up to you how far you go with it.
    Tell him that any begging to be unlocked will increase his time in there.
    Health and safety first of course.
     
  13. BKwife
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    Hubby was a bad boy last night, I think he's begging for an attitude adjustment
     
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  14. JiL
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    JiL servitude4u

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    Have you decided how to improve his poor attitude yet ?
     
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  15. JiL
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    JiL servitude4u

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    There are so many possible creative punishments. It's really all up to you.
     
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  16. BKwife
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    Not yet. Perhaps a lengthy writing assignment in an uncomfortable position. As this behavior is something I've discussed with him MANY TIMES!. He loathes writing and I loath being challenged and ignored. I'm also hoping for some expert ideas as well.
     
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  17. Bonobo
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    Bonobo Long term member

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    I think the biggest punishment is no punishment. Not partaking in his games will straighten him right up.
     
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  18. Bonobo
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    Bonobo Long term member

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    Writing the same sentence a couple hundred times is one of my wife’s favorites. I feel I must be neat with my writing perhaps you could insist on perfect sentences all lining up like columns. This should take him a few hours.
     
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  19. Rectrix
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    Rectrix Long term member

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    For this couple, with the historical "start and stop" problem, this is probably not the right solution. BK needs NOT to stop, IMHO, and instead raise the stakes and demonstrate her authority and compel his submission to it.
     
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  20. Rectrix
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    Rectrix Long term member

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    Don't put up with it. If Giga is anything like the rest of us, he fears but deeply wants a demonstration of your dominance. After all, this relationship was his idea in the first place.
     
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  21. BKwife
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    I couldn’t agree MORE! My sub keeps telling me he wants to be trained! I’d rather lock his favorite little thing away and enforce my leadership
     
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  22. BKwife
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    Oh he’s EXACTLY like the rest of you
     
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  23. Bonobo
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    Bonobo Long term member

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    He is lucky to have such an understanding Domme. There is a real need for him to feel the power you can project over him. Writing sucks and my Kadira knows this so I try and avoid having to do writing assignments.
     
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  24. BKwife
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    I’m a little TOO understanding thats the problem i have. I need to stop worrying about him so much!
     
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  25. Bonobo
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    Bring it and don’t look back.
     
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