Our FLR diary

Funishment
There is very rarely an opportunity in Covid times to be home alone, just with my Wife. Because of remote learning our kids are almost always home and we can hardly ever play some naughty, loud kinky games like spanking. Therefore when we drove home today and there was nobody in we bath quickly thought about the same. My Wife called me to the bedroom and said:
'You were late today for me.'
'Only 3 minutes, Mistress.'
'But you were. And you left dirty dishes in the sink.'
'I was going to tidy them up afternoon.'
'I do not care, you know I hate disorder when I am come home.'
'Yes, Mistress.'
'Take off your pants and lie down on the bed.' - she ordered and asked when I was preparing myself: 'The whip or the cable?'
'The whip, please'
'Well... I will punish you with the cable'.

My Wife was not actually angry with me for my 3 minute delay nor for the dirty dishes. It was just a pretext to seize the occasion when we were alone and give me a corporal punishment for fun. However, hits with a cable of phone charger sting like hell even if it just for 'fun'. Fortunatelly there were not more than 15.
Anyway, I will do my best to be more punctual and dutiful next time .
The final effect you can watch in our gallery here:

Album: Caged | Chastity Mansion

 

Shortage and shrinkage
My Wife has surprised me a bit recently when she suggested that I should try a smaller ring of my cage when I got accustomed to the current one. She has never mentioned before that making whatever shorter turns her on. It was even more surprising when she insisted that I buy a new, smaller model of my cage. I ordered it and last Wednesday it was locked on my cock that you can see here:

https://www.chastitymansion.com/forums/index.php?gallery/albums/caged-and-feminized-for-easter.6609/

The new cage is mych shorter than the previous one - full length 38 mm vs. 52 mm of the older one - but similarly comfortable. It directs my cock downwards that gives an impression as it has gone and makes it almost invisible under panties. But it is not the point of my running post...

This morning my Wife told me to take off my cage and please her with my cock. It was my first full erection since Mar 15. My cock was almost useless. After ab. 10 seconds I had to stop in order not to cum. Fortunatelly my Wife let me touch it when I was fingering her to orgasm. To her orgasm, certainly, I had to put it back into my cage after all without cumming.

It was also first time when we both noticed that my cock get shrinked. Not significantly but visibly.

'Do you like it?' - I asked my Wife.
'I have not considered it. It just happens. I like you caged and obedient.' - she said.
'Do you want to make me a woman?' - I continued.
'A woman? No. I want to make you a queer.' - my Wife answered and added:
'I have thought to fuck you with the strap-on'.
Indeed, our strap-on was used only to please my Wife pussy so far.

The perpective of shrinking my cock always used to make me horny. However, now when it happens I am not sure of I am really happy with that. We agreed that this evening we will measure my cock precisily to observe his changes in the future. I also asked if I could get orgasm tonight, but my Wife said: 'No'.

 

Big steps into permanent (?) chastity

I need to carry out a big change in my professional life and I can not find enough motivation to do it for a long time. I talked about it with my Wife many times and I am still not engaged in it as much as I should. Last week my Wife decided to motivate me in a way I did never not expect. She told me that I should stop thinking about an orgasm as long as I do not do that. My concern is that it may take me 3 months or longer. My last orgasm was on Mar 15, I am all the time aroused these days and I expected a release very soon. Although my Wife decided that after summer vacation I will have no orgasm for one year, I was not prepared for 3 month long chastity right now. Therefore I begged her to give me last orgasm before that break. My Mistress told me that if I would surprise her with something extraordinary she may consider it and MAYBE she would give me that last release. Now I am thinking what really special I could do for her to earn my last orgasm before the break…


My Wife surprised me even more next day. And here the other story starts…


As I already mentioned in my diary my Wife loves PIV sex and she did not give it up so far. But since Mar 15 my Wife unlocked me only once for PIV on Apr 03 and then locked again till now. It is the longest period of time I have been ever permanently locked having one real erection only. Before we had PIV sex at least 1 up to 3 times a week. I asked my Wife today why she did not want to be pleased with my cock recently. My Wife reminded me that last time I could fuck her for 10 seconds and had to stop in order not to cum. She told me that it is not worth to unlock me for such a short action and she prefers my tongue, vibrators or strap-on instead! When I finally asked if and when she was going to unlock me next time she answered:

‘I do not know. Not soon for sure.’

I feel that I am plunging much more deeper in my chastity...

 

Indeed, things I described in my last post affect my submissive nature intensively! I would not say I feel no longer needed, because my Wife usually gets orgasms when I lick her, finger her, or please her with her toys.

But first of all I feel that my penis becomes more and more useless and it is no longer a penis of a real man. It does not give pleasure neither to me nor to my Wife any more. It becomes an organ of pathetic throbing only, instead of real erections, and a source of endless frustration. It also shrinks and gets degraded. My Wife has recently said: 'Your cock WAS so perfectly adequate to my pussy. What is now?'. I got aware then that my penis is already too small for her and it is just a beginning of that process.

The second submissive feeling has to do with the growing awareness that I may hardly ever (or never) have PIV sex with a woman like a real man. Looking at women or talking with them I have deeper and deeper in my mind that the only organ I could give them a pleasure with is my tongue.

 

Sleeping on the floor

This night I am sleeping on the floor. Yesterday I made my Wife annoyed with some talking back and this morning my Mistress communicated to me that I deserved a punishment and the nearest night I will spend on the floor…
Our relation evolved. Formerly it was more FemDom & BDSM relation and a chastity device was used by my Mistress from time to time as one of many ways how she dominated me. Now we are near to permanent chastity and my Wife focuses on it. That is why many other aspects of BDSM are additions to the current lifestyle applied usually to punish me rather than daily practices. This also concerns sleeping on the floor. My Wife liked to send me to the floor in our bedroom quite often and sometimes a few night in a row. Today it is rare, but the rules are the same.
Sleeping on the floor I must be collared. By the way, formerly I slept in my collar every night. There is a small carpet near our bed in the bedroom and I may lie on it. It is too small for me so I am always partly on the wooden floor. I can be covered with a blanket or a sheet so I am not very cold. But no cushion or other bedding. The biggest discomfort is not from coldness but from floor hardness. It is especially trying because of the cage which brings pain when I try to lie on my belly. It is also so humiliating when I have to go to the floor whereas my Wife is reading her book in our bed nearby. It really shows me my place in our relation.
Well, I expect a hard night tonight and I am going to be sleepy tomorrow…

 

Sleeping on the floor - prolonged punishment

I got out of the habit of sleeping on the floor and the last night was really hard to me. I could not sleep and woke up many times. The carpet irritated my skin and, although I wrote in my previous post that coldness is not major discomfort, I was cold too.

Today arround the noon my Wife came to my desk and told me that she was still not pleased with my behaviour and she had expected bigger improvement so I would spend next night on the floor too. Well, although the first night was a bit exciting, the second one is a real punishment, I really wanted to rest in our bed after the last night on the floor.

Today later on my Wife was visibly provocative. When I asked anything she was harsh to me and seemed to test me if I will respectful or try to talk back again. I am doing my best to be as polite to her I could. I would actually love to come back to the bed tomorrow! I love my Wife so much and how she disciplines me!

 

Our rituals

I did not have an orgasm since Mar 15 and it is my longest period in chastity so far. Moreover, my Wife got used to her vibrator and she does not need my cock to be pleased. If she is bored with her toys she tells me to lick her to orgasm, but I stay locked. Therefore since my last orgasm in the mid of March I was unlocked maybe 3 times or so for PIV sex. I even do not remember when it happened last time, but it must have been about 2 weeks ago. My Wife does not give me a big hope for any release soon. She knows how I crave to stroke my cock so now taking off my cage for some stroking is what I hope to get one day. As my Wife says:
'If you are very obedient puppy'.

To be honest, I am unlocked 3 times a week, but it has nothing to do with my sexual pleasure. 3 times a week I practice sport. A discipline I practice could be risky if done in the cage. We have some routines connected with my sport activity. Before I go to the sport centre I need to kindly ask my Wife for the key. I am allowed to take off my cage just before my training and put it back on right after. I do it in a toilet at the cloakroom. I am obliged to give the key back to my Wife immediatelly when I am back home. About 2 weeks ago my Wife texted me:
'Today you will go to the gym collared. Send me a photo of you driving in the collar.'
When I sent her a pic she wrote:
'Here is a pupy I like! From now on you will be going to the gym collared.'
Thus, a new routine has been introduced to our relation. Sometimes I drive, but sometimes I use public communication to get the sport centre. Now it is not a problem, because I can hide my collar under my clothes, but I am a bit concerned how I will deal with that in the summer...

Yesterday, after my training, I received a message from my Wife with a photo taken in out kitchen attached and a comment (see this pic below):
'Don't expect a nice evening tonight.'
I am responsible for keeping the kitchen clean and I tried to explain that this mess had been made by the kids after I had already left for the gym. My Wife did not comment my excuses at all. But when I came to bed in the evening she said shortly:
'You are not sleeping in bed tonight'.
I did not dare to object. This night on the floor after a hard training session was especially tough to me. I could not sleep and was waking up many times. Today my body hurts me, partly because of the training, partly because of bad sleep last night. When I complained about this to my Wife she said clearly satisfied:
'Maybe you will remember your duties next time'.
I am sure I will.

 

When cock becomes useless

I have recently realised how much my situation has changed since January when I started writing this diary. In January my Wife told me that I still had a chance of 1 orgasm every 2 weeks. Although even then it did not happen that often (I had 1 orgasm in January, 1 in February and 2 in March) I had PIV sex with my Wife a few times a week and was unlocked for sex regularly. Since Mar 15, the date of my last orgasm, things has changed a lot! When my Wife found out that after a long period of chastity my cock is so badly useless to please her, she more and more used her toys, leaving me locked. Currently she very often prefers masturbation when I am not at her. Sometimes when I ask her to lick her pussy, she says with a sadistic joy something like:

'No, I am not in the mood now, go shopping. I will please myself when you are gone'.

I have to stay frustrated and do my chores bearing in mind that she is supposigly using her toys at the time. As a result my Wife unlocks me very seldom. She took off my cage to fuck her just 3 or 4 times since Mar 15. I have also had no orgasm since then and I have no idea when she is going to give me the next one. Recently, I have started asking her only to unlock me and let me stroke my cock without an orgasm. It was something beyond my mind in January when I was unlocked several times a week and never thought I would crave it so much! Finally, after a week or so of begging her, my Wife agreed and unloked me on Saturday morning.

I was aware that my stamina must be poor after such a long time without orgasm but I really was not expecting what happened. When I had put my cock into her pussy I immediatelly felt that I would cum in a moment, I could do 1 or 2 moves and I had to take it out in order not to ejaculate. My Wife must have understand that my cock is absolutelly useless for her pleasure now. She told me to stroke my cock, but it was a strange spectacle. I did 2 or 3 strokes and had to rest a few following seconds. Then 2 or 3 strokes again and so on. My Wife kept me on the edge for 30 minutes until she told me:

'It is enough, put your cage on again'
'May I lick your pussy, Mistress?' - I asked
'No! I prefer doing it with my vibe when you are in the gym. You can imagine what I am doing here during your training.'

Now I do not expect to be unlocked soon. My Wife says that she likes me caged, she likes me pleading with her to be unlocked, when I am obedient to deserve it and she also can not see any benefit for her to make me unlocked if I can not fuck her even a single minute. My Mistress always preferred PIV to oral sex, so now her toys are more interesting for her than my tongue. Now I can not cum, I can not stroke my cock, I even can not get a real erection, just a pathetic throbbing in a cage locked all the time...

 

Surprises

On Saturday, two months has passed since my last orgasm. My Wife consequently says that she is not willing to let me cum soon, so I have already resigned myself to that I should not count on a sexual pleasure. Nevertheless, in the last week my Wife surprised me twice.

First time it was when I talked with her trying to find out about her plans for how long I will stay locked and how long she wants to keep me with no orgasm. My Mistress told me once more that she was not going to give me any orgasm in the near future. But additionally she said:

‘Even if it takes place one day do not think that you will do it in front of me. You will go to the bathroom and just will cum. You can not have too much pleasure out of it’

To be honest, I have never expected that my Wife can think out such an idea. That would mean no more orgasm with my lovely Wife… No more my orgasm, of course.

The second time my Wife surprised me on Saturday morning. On Friday I asked her if can be unlocked. My Wife said:

‘But you were stroking your cock last Saturday!’
‘Yes, but it was a week ago, Mistress’
‘And it must be enough for you for a time being’.

But on Saturday morning my Wife gave me a key of my cage and told me:

‘I am going out for an hour. You can stroke your cock when I am out. Of course, you can not cum. I want to see you caged again when I am back.’

It is very first time since I am locked when my Wife left me the key and let me stroke my cock when she is not by me. I got excited immediately like a youngster who first time was going to have sex with a girl. The first thing I have noticed when I got full erection was that my penis is significantly smaller. I took a liner and measured it: 15 cm. It means 2 cm less than in January. We both have realized that it shrunk already in April, but now it is really visible.

I was stroking and texting with my Wife:

‘Thank you, Mistress.’
Wife: ‘Photo’
‘Yes Mistress. It shrunk one centimeter more’
Wife: ‘What for is a big cock for a sissy?’
‘For nothing’
Wife: ‘Exactly. Enjoy until you can’

I had in mind that I must have been caged when my Wife was back, but I did not know when exactly she was going to be home. Therefore I stopped playing after 30 minutes or so and spent next 10 minutes to calm down and put my cock into the cage again.

I have no idea when I am unlocked next time. Recently, my Wife loves surprising me. So it could be both tonight and in a month’s time…

 

What if she is serious?

Last Sunday morning I asked my Mistress if she wanted me to please her sexually. But she informed me that she had just got her period. Then I asked if I could be unlocked to touch myself. She looked at me angry and said:
- What? You are insolent! You deserve to be whipped for that request!
I did not dare to continue the talk. 5 minutes later my Wife... brought me the key and said:
- You can stroke it for 20 minutes.
She went out of our bedroom and left me alone. I could not believed in what happened, but I unlocked my penis quickly and started stroking it. My Wife was back to the bedroom 20 minutes later and said shortly:
- Enough, stop it, put the cage on.
I knew that it denoted the end of my pleasure for that day. But I even did not suppose how distant the next time could be...
The next day, i.e. Monday, I asked my Wife when she was going to unlock me again.
- I do not know. For sure not in the comming months.
I was astonished with the answer and was not sure if she understood my question correctly. Maybe she thought that I had asked about my orgasm? That is why I asked again:
- You do not want to unlock me to let me stroke my cock for a few months?
- Certainly, I will not let you stroke yourself. Maybe one day I will let you fuck me, but I do not know yet.
I immediatelly got as hard as I could with the cage on. Her statement made me really horny, but now I find it incredibly tough. No orgasm, no touching for months? I was not even aware that my Sunday stroking might be my last. I believe my Wife just teases me, but what if she is serious?

 

In the shower

Fortunatelly, my sweet Wife did not keep her word and let me touch my cock and stroke it 2 or 3 times since my last entry in this diary. One of those cases was particularly hot and I would like to tell you that story.

It was two weeks ago when I went out with my wife for a four-day excursion. One day at a hotel I proposed to my Wife that we go for a morning shower together. She agreed and she took the key with herself. My Mistress unlocked me in the shower and told me to fuck her from behind in a standing position. My cock got hard immediatelly and surprisingly I was able to please my Wife with it relatively long in comparison to the last few PIVs. After about 45 or 60 seconds I felt that I was on the edge and had to stop. Then my Wife told me to kneel down and lick her ass hole. After a while she turned to me and pushed her pussy into my mouth.

'You can stroke' - my Wife said.

I immediatelly began doing it, but I had to stop every moment to avoid the oncomming orgasm.
Then my Wife opened a bottle of shampoo, put the shampoo on my head and started massaging it. It was so sexy feeling her fingers in my hair when my tongue tried to please her wet pussy. As she rinsed my head she put her foot on my shoulder and started shaving her leg when I was still licking her passionately. After my Mistress shaved both her legs using me as a footrest she pushed my head back a little and said:

'Now I want to pee on my slave.'

I did not stop licking me Wife when her piss was running down my mouth, over my chest into my pathetic cock, which I was still touching. After that she finally let me lick her to orgasm.

'Enough!' - my Wife said angry and slapped my face hard seeing that I was still stroking. - 'Put your cage on now!'

It was the last time when I got unlocked during our trip.

--------------------------------

Three days ago it has been already three months since I had my last orgasm. I have no prospect of getting any in the near future. Soon I will write a bit more about my impressions and feelings.

 

100 days

This morning I have realised that tomorrow will be the 100th day of having NO orgasm. The funny thing is that I do not even remember what the last orgasm looked like. I searched my diary for its description, but apparently did not described it. When I was cumming the last time I did not think that it is so important, I expected the next one in 2 weeks and it even did not occur to me that I would not have the next one for so long.

I wondered how I would feel after a long time without a release. Would my sexual excitement rise or desent? I can say now that I am horny all the time, but it waves. There are a few days when I can not stop thinking about cumming and the next few when I am on a reletively low level of excitement. It also seems to me that my urge is lower than after first 2 - 3 weeks without an orgasm. An important aspect is that my Wife gives me no chance for orgasm in the near future. Therefore I do not expect it and I have made up my mind to stay without release. I am sure it calms me down and eases my frustration.

Also night erections do not wake me up every night. They happen less often and usually cause discomfort rather than pain so I can fall asleep again without going to the toilet. I am coming to a conclusion that my night erections must be much rarer and weaker. In the meantime I changed my 46 mm ring into 43 mm. Originally the smaller one seemed to be very restrictive and tight. Over time I got used to it and now it seems more and more too small. I consider changing it into the smallest one (38 mm).

Although I have not had an orgasm since the mid of March, I am still unlocked from time to time. So I have a real erection (out of the cage) every week or two. My penis has shrunk a bit, but not much (1 - 2 cm) but it got curved downward noticeably. Stroking is extremely frustrating anyway. First of all because I am aware that it is useless, I get excited on but after a while I have to calm down and get caged again. Second, I usually get close to the edge and have to stop before my cock is fully erected. Then I can stroke it for 2 - 3 seconds and need a longer break in order not to cum.

I also realised that chastity becomes harder in the summer when caged males can see all those sexy woman showing off their half-naked bodies in the streets. The awareness that I am unable to have sex with either of them, even if they want to, is so frustrating. Especially since my cock can only pathetically throb in its cage without any hope of getting orgasm even with my own Wife.

 

Still locked

Yesterday my Wife asked me:

- Do you think that your cock has shrunk?
- I do not know... - I replied, surprised
- Should we measure it? - she teased me
- Yes, of course - I answered immediatelly and my cock got hard and started throbbing in my cage.

All afernoon I was incredibly excited wating for my cock to be taken out of the cage and I could feel a REAL FULL erection. My last out-of-the-cage erection was in early June, over a month ago.

When we were in bed in the evening I asked:
- Do you want to make sex, Mistress?
- I do not want to make sex with you, slave. But I want you to please me.

I started kissing and caressing my Wife. I reminded her:
- Should we measure my cock, Mistress?
- No, not today.
- But you said we would do it tonight.
- I have changed my mind, slave.
- Please, Mistress, I crave an erection so much - I started whining
- Shut up and lick my pussy or you will sleep on the floor this night.

Eventually my Wife told me that I could ask her to unlock my cock on Friday, but emphasized that it did not mean she would agree. It depends on her mood that day and my behaviour.

My frustration was extreme. I was so much hoping to be unlocked that day. I tried to calm down and focus on licking my Wife's sweet pussy, but frustration was so high anyway. But I was doing my best to make her as much pleasure as my tongue could. She got a big O and fell asleep next to me when I had to calm down and come to terms with my frustration.