Opinions Please

I believe that susie is asking for an opinion about whether a Mistress should stretch a sissy's limits - and not asking for an opinion about whether susie should have pierced nipples. In her own words "So i took the plunge for her and it made us both very happy" clearly indicates that Mistress often knows what is best for sissy.

So - Yes - it is My opinion that some and perhaps, many limits, should be stretched by a caring Mistress. I think even a sissy knows when her own best interest is being guarded by a Mistress - stretching limits is not simply an act of cruelty. In susie's case, her need of femming is quite powerful. Mistress had to use a bit of persuasion but the intent was for the benefit of susie - to aid in her femming.

I think of limits as more of a goal than anything else. Goals do need to be broadened for growth. At the same time - the safety and security of the individual should not be compromised.

As an example - a sissy might have a hard limit to not appear in public dressed in feminine attire. But, her Mistress may realize that the limit is merely a fear factor for the sissy - not a threatening situation. So, to further her sissy's growth, She might encourage the gurl, in small steps, to become a member of society dressed appropriately for her gender. Is that a cruel act?

Some limits are truly meant to be stretched - others not. Do you trust your Mistress?

:smilies_xxx02:

 

stretching limits !

Just my thoughts at this point in my life. Life is very short (things happen in the blink of an eye ) to change your life or somone else's ! so i am willing to try things that at an earlier time were "hard limits", because i personally have found out how fragile life is & how things change. I lived a VERY CONSERVATIVE lifestyle for 30 years!! now i feel like i am finally experiencing things that i NEVER would have! I have been Tatooed! had my nippples pierced (closed up during my recent hospital stay), I will have them done again , i miss that so much ! so yes Mistress's may wish to Stretch limits , but i hope some will read this & reconsider their "hard limits". Believe me life is precious but very short , in the grand scheme. just the thoughts of a seasoned citizen. thank you susie for this very interesting subject, disciplinedpet:confused0068: :anim_37:

 

susie is such a good gurl isn't she?

And disciplined pet, you summed it up quite nicely - growth is good. Life is meant to be experienced.

 

We all change, all the time. Many things that were scary to me years ago, are now mundane. Some things that I'd never consider, now turn me on.

I think limits are a statement of the "here and now". A good Dom/me will come to understand where the future might take you, and help you along. :character0109:

 

Congratulations on your new nipple piercings suzy q! What fun! I had to give mine up because of too many medical procedures etc. It's too bad that the Docs can't work with us a little on the piercing removal. I don't think they realize that nipples heal up so quickly and I don't suppose they really give a damn anyway. Doctors tend to be prudish in general- quite vanilla even when they think they're swingers.

 

I agree with all said as well. if someone had told me 30 years ago that in my mid 50's I'd be dressing like a woman, (24/7 now) performing like a woman, a personal slave to a woman, and a secretary in a lawyers office full of gays and TV's. I'd probably would have took 'em to the booby hatch. (This is a nut house, not some new kinda bra).
Life was short and is getting shorter. Right now I'm happier than I've ever been. Family is even getting used to it. Mom an Dad took me to dinner last week to celebrate my retirement. Mom said the full length black dress I was wearing looked great on me and wanted to know where I got my ear rings.

 

And BTW a question about nipple piercing. Doesn't your bra irritate them?

 

Do they take as long to heal as my ears did? That took 6 weeks before I could change out the starter studs.

 

Please excuse me prying. But Mistress wants this done to me as well. What kind of rings did you get. The full circle kind or the ones with the balls on the ends. I'm leaning toward the full circle kind.
Mistress and work will just have to endure me flat chested for awhile if she wants this done. I think the hooters will have to stay home til all heals!

 

i had my nipples done and two done in the lower. The nips were the tougher of the two and yes the healing time takes about the same time for everything. It's a process but using the saline spray is essential for keeping out any infection - the healing is key. i now only have the one down below. They are removable (here tday and gone tomorrow) and this was what i was a able to negotiate rather than a permanent tat marking (sooooooo glad about this).

As far as stretching limits and growth, what Miss D alludes to, yes all good if done in agreement and with a caring Domme. Thank You Ma'am, for pointing this out. It's the compromise done in the right spirit that makes the relationship work. And besides, the play becomes all the much better with something to hang weights and objects off of. Oh the fun upcoming. Ms. Michelle must be loving this with Her plans for susie - what fun upcoming for Domme and sissy/sub.

Just agree to agree - and make it clear, the reasoning. One can see how Ms. Michelle treats Her subs - so well, by showing them attention and they in turn, respect and oblige Her.

Good thread susie - hoping to read other thoughts.

 

Goddess and i just a talk last night about this on a similar line, but more about expanding limits as people get deeper into the lifestyle. Right now a big topic of conversation at out local dungeon is piss play (yuck!). A lot of people are into this though and an event is being planned for this summer where they will set up a slip and slide outside so the subs can slip down a slid covered in piss! Some people are really into it while Goddess and i have hit a hard limit with it. Most of the people into this event are long time life-stylers, which is kinda the point i was trying to get at... the longer one is in the lifestyle, the further they are likely to go in their play. So while piss play is a very hard limit for us now, who is to say what we will think in 5, 10 or even 20 years!

Boundaries are meant to be pushed and as long as it is consensual and no permanent damage is done... go for it and have fun!

@IMkik4U... this is a bit off topic, but even permanent piercings really aren't permanent. The holes will close up and just leave a tiny scar (if any). Nipple piercings are perhaps on of the most painful piercings to get (although belly button piercings are supposed to be pretty bad too). Not sure about the healing time, but if you search for piercing sites, many of them have great info on healing times and aftercare as well as advice on how to find a GOOD piercer.

 

being a introverted "straight" submissive i have a plethora of "hard limits" which if pushed or broken would surely break my already fragile existence with in the "lifestyle".

it's of course subjective as to what pushing ones limits means from O/one to the O/other, but if it is a "hard limit" for that one it is due to a deep emotional personal reason and must be respected. if an agreed upon and established understanding has been welcomed by the one previous to a "push" i agree it can be a healthy and rewarding growth for B/both.

yes i have my reasons for posting this response and they are personal.

thank Y/you

 

I fully agree. When I first came into the lifestyle over a dozen years ago, there were a ton of limits both hard, and soft that I thought I'd never cross. But as I've gotten involved in the lifestyle, met some incredible folks, dated a few, and now serve someone who is very special, I've now done things that were previous hard limits that no longer bother me.

I think the thing is to try things that you think you'll enjoy. See what you like and don't like and just have fun. Then once you've done somethings, then see what else you might like or try something that might be a little uncomfortable to you but your partner really wants to try (expand a soft limit). After awhile, you'll find that there are so many things to try and do that it makes life very enjoyable. To me, I'd rather live life, try things and if I like them great, and if I don't then don't do them again. But I don't want to be the old bitter guy saying life sucked and wishing I would have done things when I had the chance.

 

I got 'em done.Went out at lunch. Hell of a way to spend lunch huh? Not that bad. Anyone got a Tylenol? Mistress is elated. Promised me a big reward. Not sure what it will be, but she told me to have Toni follow me home from the office. 2+2= cummie.

 

Back to the subject of limits. Everyone needs to have them either firmly stated or understood through your knowledge and trust of your Mistress or master. I agree that they should be tested from time to time. A good Mistress would probably know how to push them and through her testing of the limits, they will surely move over time especially if she is into control and conditioning. She will then have fun reminding her sub of what his limits originally were and asking him how he feels now that he loves getting fucked in the ass say or consuming his own spunk. These then become things she can use to remind him of his humble condition and how he has "lowered" himself to accept her humiliations. Limits are great, but my how they move and change when a dominant woman makes those subtle suggestions when your unsatisfied balls are aching, your cock swinging around in empty air or crushed in some restricting device with no hope of release. Tiny steps made at her direction may lead you into total obedience and absolutely no concern for your original prideful and maybe even prudish limits.
All hail our Mistresses!:licking:

 

i think my favorite part of bdsm in general is when Mistress pushes my limits. it's important to work together to establish Y/your hard and soft limits. Mistress has an uncanny ability to know which areas can be stretched. for me there is nothing more exciting than when She introduces something that is beyond what W/we have discussed.

 

Just one final remark on the nipple piercing issue: When I had mine done I was very optimistic about the healing time. I had read many reports that said a 6 week healing time was about normal. Well, after 6 months I was still not fully healed. After a year I removed the rings and let the holes close up. I was very disappointed (even though I had had a lot of fun admiring my pierced nipples, taking pictures etc.). I don't want to discourage anybody from trying it if they want to- I certainly don't regret it, but don't be too surprised if it doesn't work out. Be prepared for a huge let down if you have to give them up. I was really surprised at how much of a loss I felt. Silly I guess but pretty good proof that I really am a sissy.