No orgasms or no erections, which is worse?

Depends on what you count for "orgasms"... Prostate orgasms? If you take those away too then the answer is clear. If I can have erections and anal orgasms, life is just fine

 

Being denied orgasms is no big deal.

 

No erections is the killer for me. Not sure why but I really miss them. Once I go a few days without an orgasms it gets a little easier for me not to have one.

 

Sorry I was using BK iPad to post a picture for her and I answered your thread. The post above is from me.

 

Phew. I was getting a bit confused

 

Not being able to erect can be quite frustrating at times. I view denial of orgasm as a gift in comparison.

 

This is a no-brainer question for me. I have some experience with prolonged edging and orgasm denial. At my age, it's even fun to be teased and kept in a horny state for days on end. But being deprived of erections is a whole different story. I'm only willing to consider it now because my prospective keyholder insists that she, also, doesn't intend to be unduly deprived of my erections.

 

No problem . I haven't had a erection since the last time I was allowed to have one. . That was weeks ago. Even when she will give me an release , she uses her majic wand in between the boys and bends me down to the wand and just holds it there. I can not get hard even then.

 

I'm kind of curious on what you mean by going without erection. If you mean just being in a small enough cage that you can't get typical full erections, that's pretty easy to me. To say I prefer struggling against the cage over a free erection would be an understatement.

 

Erections for me. Claustrophobia of being constantly constrained is unrelenting.

 

While you can and do still get erections while caged, even long term, I found them to be significantly less frequent and often required intentionally stimulating to achieve them. That felt really weird at times.

Orgasms are very much an out of sight, out of mind thing. If I'm not actively keeping track of how long it has been since I last had one, I generally don't think or worry about it too much.

 

Not being allowed erections was the most emasculating thing for me in this whole process. For me, the big mind bender was when my keyholder said she allow me any unlocked erections. Just having the willpower not to masturbate wasn't enough now. It had to be locked down full time. To her, and now to me, an erection is no different than sex or masturbation. Once the penis is no longer a sex organ, then everything else follows. In the early days, the penis was a sex organ, and chastity restrained it. Now it just puts it away to be tidy. I do have locked erections, but without the head being stimulated, they are more like a sensitive mound between the legs.

Finding a cage I can sleep in was what did it, and allowed that to happen. I wear a very tiny metal cage that's just a cap really. The entire shaft is up inside the body with those. Mentally, you don't have a shaft or head to the penis anymore with those, and that goes a long way to mentally accepting the no erections rule. I find an erection in a longer cage is much more like an actual erection, but in armour, if that makes sense. My last unlocked erection was with my keyholder, back in mid October, and being a sadist, she proceeded to beat it till it went down. Oddly, that took much longer than either of us expected, but we are kinky folk!!

 

Very interesting thread @KHCouple4517

Not sure on my thoughts on this. I think in general the issue is discomfort from prolonged attempted erections when caged.

I'd say the biggest difficulty for me is prolonged denial of stimulation or penetration. I think without the orgasm for longer is easier as long as there is stimulation fairly frequently.

 

Over weekends, nights and holidays I'm locked up. Over the majority of the working week I'm on the honour system until the evening. It's early stages but I think I prefer being locked up, but I'm also fighting against uncaged temptation where I feel guilty just getting an erection. If I get one, say whilst taking the cage off in the shower on a morning, or whilst putting it back on after work.. I want to play with it, to make it feel even better. To then calm down and get it back locked is difficult. Now, when I'm locked up and they keys are far away I'm much calmer.

 

Great question.
Definitely going without an erection is much more difficult.
I'm currently at 3-1/2 months since my last real orgasm and 9 months being the longest O denial so far; although I intensely crave an orgasm obviously that's part of the magic of chastity as my own internal craving is now transferred and focused on my Wife @n2toys

Saturday night's are our usual play nights where I'm put into some sort of bondage and let out of my cage where I'm allowed to grow and then teased and/or tortured; once in awhile my Mistress will keep me locked over the weekend which occasionally is not too bad as I'm also a masochist and also enjoy the struggle against my cage but I'd hate to never be allowed to grow again.

 

I've written about this before when I've seen this focus on how long it's been since some guy had an orgasm.

There's no question that loss of my erection is the central fact of chastity for me. It makes clear to me that I'm not like other "real" men anymore and that only by serving my wife and loving her will I have the possibility of her permitting me to become firm and hard and erect and fully alpha male. Indeed, erection control is why we started chastity. We had decided a few years ago as part of our FLR that I would no longer cum without permission. But I've been a masturbator my whole life, with all the erectile narcissism and emotional separateness that masturbators have and that we were trying to overcome, but instead of masturbating to orgasm I just became a compulsive edger, masturbating at least twice a day to a dripping edge. That changed nothing of the erectile narcissism I needed to overcome to become the loving, emotionally available, submissive husband our FLR needed.

And so the cage became part of our life. Now, she decides when he may become erect, she decides when that male force may be unleashed. She likes my erection, she likes PIV, and she likes knowing, really *knowing*, that this is a gift she can give to me and that I will crave those moments like no other, that I am not jaded or only half present. Usually, she'll permit him to grow and throb every two or three weeks, and about half the time she'll let him enter and understand the gift only she can give, but she hardly ever let's him spurt. The longest she's ever denied erection was 56 days (and the second longest was 36 days) -- yes, that's what I count.

 

This didn't work for me, I just masturbated in the bathroom or shower at work.

 

To expand on what I said earlier. I view the denial of orgasm totally as a positive thing. I much prefer to float along in my denial than to experience the low that comes with having an orgasm.

The lack of erection can be trying, both physically and psychologically. When you consider the basic function of a penis, it is to become erect and well, penetrate. I believe that this is built into the male animal at a very basic level, and to take that away is fundamentally emasculating.

I have to say also that erection just feels good. At least for growers, there appear to be pressure sensors in the shaft which seem to function only when everything is fully stretched out. Part way efforts don't satisfy at all. For me, it is really only an exercise in frustration.

 

It's not just the denial of an erection for me, it's the denial of touching my own penis while it's erect. Being teased to erection even without edging and then denied drives me crazy but I also crave it at the same time.

 

Before chastity, I would have said orgasm. Now that I have been caged, I know how much I miss erections when they aren't permitted.

 

I dearly love to have my keyholders property erect when allowed, even tho im no longer permitted to see it hard. I crave erections and love the tease of being allowed one and denied orgasm. Couldnt go without erections even if i dont see them anymore